Confusing shy girl

Okay, I have never been in relationship with girl. But now I think I'm infatuated to girl who looks me all the time.

First time I noticed her in our university cafeteria. She sit down to table next to table I was sitting, so that she was directly looking at me. She looked me few times as she was eating and when she noticed I was looking her too, she started to look elsewhere.

Now 2 days ago she was on computer with friend. I sit some rows behind her and suddenly she logged out from her computer and she tried to come sit next to me, only to notice that someone had locked it. So she went to computer that was front of me. I saw that she wasn't really doing anything, just looking her past Facebook discussions. The computer next to her was then freed and I was wondering should I sit next to her, but I couldn't bring myself to it. She left and I went to cafeteria to have some tea, to calm down a little. Then I went to look for her, until I saw her sitting alone. I gathered my courage and went to talk to her. I asked "how are you doing?" and she seemingly was very happy and we talked about some stuff. Our discussion ended when some other people came to sit there too. She went to class and I left home. But I forgot to ask her name! (I know it already, but I don't want to seem like stalker, I could easily ask her as friend in Facebook but she might become suspicious). And I don't want to scare her either.

On next day I saw her on computer where she tried to print something. It seemed that her document didn't print and I said that she should check is it right printer. She said that the printer didn't have any paper and she left to search for another space where she could print it. When she left the room, she smiled and looked at me and I looked her back. I went after her but I didn't find her anywhere.

Today I saw her with her friend on computer so I sit down on another computer nearby. She seemed to be ignoring me totally, I tried to get eye contact but it didn't work at all. They talked about something, it almost sounded they were talking about me. She and her friend left the room and she didn't even look at me.

Now I have longest weekend ever. I'm really confused about this whole situation. She is very shy, as I'm too. I know her name, but I just can't ask her to be my friend in Facebook (she would wonder how I got her name). I have to just wait for next week and try to get contact to her without scaring her.

Ladies, why are you so complicated

reply to post by Thebel


Just ask her out....Using speech.
It is really simple If she says "Yes" Hooray If she says "No" move on.

Sometimes you got to stand up and be a man, just do it!

That is so cute . Enjoy the flirting and chase and butterflies. I some days which I was back at that stage of my life. It's a confusing but wonderful part of life & learning. If you are keen for her, be confident in what you want but not in an arrogant way. It's obvious she's got the hots for you from what you say. So do continue to make conversation with her, FB friending her is not the way to really get to know someone. Wait till next week, Good luck!

boymonkey74
reply to post by Thebel

 

Just ask her out....Using speech.
It is really simple If she says "Yes" Hooray If she says "No" move on.

This would be the key.
It really is that simple. Say hello, ask her out for coffee, problem solved.

reply to post by Thebel


What I do is just keep myself open, make sure you maximise the possibility of conversation starting, not in a stalkery way but try and be at the same place she is at at the same time. Then, once you have a bit of conversation going, ask her out somewhere.

Also, just some tips for conversation, ask questions, and only tell her things if she asks you a question. Everyone loves to talk about themselves, give her lots of opportunity to do so, then once you know enough about her you can have some proper chats. But seriously, just. ask. questions.

Also make sure you smell good (more important than you would think), you don't look too scruffy (not that important if you can hold a good conversation) and make sure you brush your teeth and have some gum! You never know if the opportunity would arise for a kiss and the last thing you want is her to think (I am never kissing this person again...).

Good luck, don't over think it, all you need to keep in mind is ASK QUESTIONS.

edit: Don't chew the gum while your with her, she might think you're trying to look like a badass and failing, just thought I would mention to make sure haha

second edit: Also, not to be rude, but if you send her a text message, or chat on facebook, remember the existence of the word 'the', 'a' and 'an' you missed them religiously in your post!

reply to post by Thebel


May I offer you a little morsel of advice?

Conversation is a more effective form of communication, than observation. You can shake your plumage at one another like birds, for as long as you like, but until you converse with one another, on topics of interest, and you get to know one another a little bit, you will STILL be confused!

There is a certain pleasure to be derived from this uncertainty, do not get me wrong. But if you wish to be less confused than you are, then you may have to bite the bullet, and actually communicate a little more

I wish you the very best of luck!

Meh.. grow a pair.. talk to her and ask her out .. worst can happen is she says no ..

reply to post by Thebel


Unfortunately you must take the lead.

If you leave it too long; you'll come across as weird ...

I'm with them ^^^^^^^^



( Let us know how it goes )

The right answer ... vvvvv

Thank you for your advice. Its a bit awkward to know her name, though I haven't asked it. She is finnish, but on english course, so her friends are english. She said that she likes challenge in that

reply to post by Thebel


Just ask her for her name.....Go up to her and say "Hello Iam *insert name here* what's your name?".
Honestly it is this simple.

reply to post by boymonkey74


Or accidentally crash into her in a food line or some such ... and buy her lunch ... whilst introducing yourself.

Or, as I always said before my motto was patented. " Just Do It ! " To extrapolate ... don't spend too much time thinking.

JUST DO IT !!

reply to post by boymonkey74


Don't hide behind the compute r . The next time you see her do something sweet give a flower you can even pick it instead of buying it entice her the build is so much fun :

reply to post by PrincessOfPhilosophy


Thebel would have been a better directive ...

reply to post by Thebel


I don't give advice anymore. The last time I did, I said to a 19 year old Canadian, go ahead and do drinking and drag racing and illegal drugs! You're a star, no-one will bust you!

So all I can say is follow your heart.

reply to post by PrincessOfPhilosophy


Yeah good idea that, op don't make a collage of many pics of her and send it her as a gift

Thebel, she's doing what is known in English as "playing hard to get". She's trying to get you to talk to her, which you did, but then later when she was with her friend she ignored you.

You MUST, as all the other posters have said, approach her and ask her out. She's expecting it. If she didn't find you attractive, she wouldn't have continually put herself in your path so that you could look at her.

It's a game we females play. If we're too direct with men, they often get the wrong idea. Look at her as a flower, and yourself as the bee.

If she rejects you, then she's a game-player and you do not want to waste your time thinking about her any longer. Move on to the next flower.

I can tell you a lot of things that don't work well. Seems like I was always using the wrong strategies on the girls I wanted to go out with when I was young. Women are all different, I just was awkward with choosing the right style for the right girl when I was younger.

Just ask her if she wants to go for coffee or some other refreshments some evening. Caffeine gets people gabbing, so does moderate drinking. Getting drunk doesn't work well most times......except with some girls.

Don't take advice from me, I messed up a lot when I was young but did get married a couple of times, the last one lasting lasting twenty nine years so far. Always remember to allow the one your going with to have a little room later on, if you see each other too much it never seems to work well. We are individuals that come together, being around each other too much can make us get on each others nerves. Spend quality time together when you are together.

If women don't keep you confused, I think there may be something wrong with them. It is in their job description.

reply to post by Thebel


I hate to say it man, but she doesn't sound shy to me. I think you may be misinterpreting something here. How ever I could be wrong.

The best thing you can probably do is be right up front and ask her out. She either thinks you're cute, or she doesn't and don't take it harshly if she doesn't want to go out. University is filled with tons of girls, and you have to understand some of them aren't interested in meeting people. They could want to focus on their studies, have boyfriends(or girlfriends I suppose), be married, or simply not looking for anyone.

Don't let the young ladies reactions get you down. You have a 50/50 shot. Yes or a no, just be casual ask her to coffee or to join you for lunch or something. You may get a date, a friend or it will go no where and then you can look for another cute girl you haven't noticed yet.