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False Beauty in the media

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posted on Dec, 30 2013 @ 05:51 AM
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ParasuvO
reply to post by Akragon
 


I am calling BS, the girls and women I see in my area are mostly finding it quite easy to be BETTER looking, more fit, and more healthy mentally than anyone in the movies.

I find the media's idea of hot, not as hot and amazing as SOOOO many females all around.

I thank GOD these women are so magnificent, sure of themselves, and ready to better themselves some MORE.


Where do you live, if you don't mind my asking? And I do agree to some extent that there is finally a large enough movement out there that seems to be bringing some more common sense into the public arena regarding our view of physical beauty.

Just yesterday, after participating in this thread, I saw a news story on my Bing homepage about a plus sized Barbie being in the works. Not sure if it has been cast mass distribution, but the photos I've seen are interesting.

I believe this is the actual "concept" doll, which at first I thought was Skipper (Barbie's sister).


Then there's this one which seems to dominate the "images" page for plus-sized Barbie.


Then it seems to take an offensive turn.


And just to be fair to body image issues, someone made this "Barbie" and it's scary!




posted on Dec, 31 2013 @ 10:58 PM
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If we really get down to the bottom of these, it's not just skinny women...


It's really the "Caucasian Beauty" or "European Beauty". That the race is overly represented not only in world mass media but in product promotion as well. A distant second are the fair-skinned Asians.

In countries where Asians, Africans, Aborigines and Latinos are the majority, their respective entertainment/performing arts industry they have heavy preference towards light-skinned applicants and those with most Caucasian features and light skinned to represent beauty.


To think that "we no longer discriminate people by skin color" or by race is still quite alive and kicking in the mass media.

Perhaps its the fact that light-skinned and/or Caucasian-featured people generated the most money in entertainment industry due to the "forced image" of beauty they have done in the first place... ...They are not ready to lose profits even if temporarily for the sake of change so they stuck with racism in entertainment industry.



posted on Jan, 1 2014 @ 11:10 AM
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bigfatfurrytexan


These statues are found literally everywhere. If not this specific one, a variation on it (you may see some with dozens of breasts hanging off....a true fertility goddess).

This is what ancient man saw as beautiful. This is what modern man secretly desires. There are multiple papers, articles, and dissertations on the above shape as a sexual and nurturing archetype.

Men may follow fashion and fad, and take a scrawny woman out in public. But at home.....he wants his Venus.


Whoa good thing I didn't live in those times....I'm 113lbs with a 32A cup. I would've been down right disgusting to men!


But I agree. All this false beauty BS is ridiculous...it's not gonna matter when you're dead.



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 06:00 AM
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bigfatfurrytexan


These statues are found literally everywhere. If not this specific one, a variation on it (you may see some with dozens of breasts hanging off....a true fertility goddess).

This is what ancient man saw as beautiful. This is what modern man secretly desires. There are multiple papers, articles, and dissertations on the above shape as a sexual and nurturing archetype.

Men may follow fashion and fad, and take a scrawny woman out in public. But at home.....he wants his Venus.


I'm sure there are some men who find that desirable, but I wouldn't generalize modern man. I'm not interested in that at all. I don't judge it, but it doesn't do it for me. To me that specific body looks like a body I associate with older women, and I don't check out older women. I don't find the idea of fertility goddess's all that desirable either. A fertility goddess has too many kids by to many different guys. Screw that, I'll take my chances somewhere else.

I'm more of a in between type of guy. All I need is a cute face and nice personality that doesn't have a bunch of kids by a bunch of guys.

I wont make generalizations about what women want in a man either. I'm a big hairy guy with a beard, some very beautiful women find me repulsive, others can't keep their hands off me. Study's show that when women are ready for the babies they go for my type, but I see plenty of pretty boy fathers. There aren't a lot of men like me in porn, I'm not bothered by it though, cause I wouldn't want to see me boning either. Give me the muscular stud any day.
edit on 2-1-2014 by mahatche because: (no reason given)
edit on 2-1-2014 by mahatche because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 08:04 AM
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reply to post by mahatche
 


THere was a study a couple of years ago that indicated that search terms like "bbw" and "chubby" were among the most popular porn search terms.

You and I may take a different meaning on the word "generalize", as I am meaning it in a purely statistical manner rather than the "broad brush" concept.

Research Finds That Straight Men Like Looking At Big Women and Penises

Since we all assign so much of "who we are" to sex, it isn't something that we really feel comfortable discussing openly. But it is an interesting subject even if uncomfortable.



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 09:07 AM
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Rhoswen
reply to post by CranialSponge
 

But aging as woman is this society is no fun. You become invisible.


This is so true and a fascinating thing as well because it's true even for very beautiful older women. Age is everything in a youth driven culture.



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 02:57 PM
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bigfatfurrytexan
reply to post by mahatche
 


THere was a study a couple of years ago that indicated that search terms like "bbw" and "chubby" were among the most popular porn search terms.

You and I may take a different meaning on the word "generalize", as I am meaning it in a purely statistical manner rather than the "broad brush" concept.

Research Finds That Straight Men Like Looking At Big Women and Penises

Since we all assign so much of "who we are" to sex, it isn't something that we really feel comfortable discussing openly. But it is an interesting subject even if uncomfortable.


I don't know how reliable that is. it says there was 3 times as many search results for big girls than skinny girls, but you really don't have to search for specific phrase "skinny girls" to find skinny girls in porn, it's just what the majority of them are. Big women are a specific search. So if it's a study based solely off search words it could have that flaw.

If you go to any porn site and click their most viewed video tab, it'srare that you see videos of big women among the most popular. The do seem more prevalent on amateur porn sites though. Maybe there is something to that. There is more of them on sites with "real" women.
edit on 2-1-2014 by mahatche because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 03:37 PM
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Since it's a pet peeve of mine, I just want to point out, that I think skinny women are also real women. it's like "real americans" in politics. It's nice that you feel good about yourself, but we're all real. Just love yourself and be happy.

Women have real women's syndrome coming at them from every direction. Everything from weight to armpit hair is made into a real woman issue.

I can't blame people for what they like though. Even though we are only conditioned for it, I got pretty used to a life time of seeing shaved legs. The first time I came across a girl with hairy legs It was a shock to the system. It's natural and real, but it felt like I was looking at a mythical creature for the first time, or contact with aliens. You'd think I'd be naturally attracted tot he natural form, but sometimes I'm just not. Big eyebrows too, they are natural, but it's weird seeing them.

The point is, we are all real. YEA!
edit on 2-1-2014 by mahatche because: (no reason given)
edit on 2-1-2014 by mahatche because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 04:27 PM
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reply to post by mahatche
 


I would be interested in some real research on the topic. The hidden gems of the psyche....that kind of stuff interests me.



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 05:13 PM
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In truth, the Villendorfer Venus and her ilk were probably meant as aids in child-birth; the danger to mothers has always been greatest at the moment of delivery---and the size of the child's head is the most problematic issue for passing through the birth canal. Primal folks may have thought that larger women had an easier time passing a kid. Not the same thing as who they wanted to do the horizontal rumba with.



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 05:19 PM
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reply to post by tovenar
 


That may be true.

It could also be the "mother figure" concept, as well (touching on the Freudian).

Or, perhaps it is a vanity feature. Women who were more rotund were seen as more affluent? In latin culture, having skin that is lighter colored is a thing of beauty due to it being a sign that you don't have to work in the sun all day. It distinguishes you as affluent enough to not have to work the fields. THen there is the "brown paper bag" test seen in some african american cultures (which has been picked up by some latins along the way).



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 06:08 PM
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bigfatfurrytexan
reply to post by mahatche
 


THere was a study a couple of years ago that indicated that search terms like "bbw" and "chubby" were among the most popular porn search terms.

You and I may take a different meaning on the word "generalize", as I am meaning it in a purely statistical manner rather than the "broad brush" concept.

Research Finds That Straight Men Like Looking At Big Women and Penises

Since we all assign so much of "who we are" to sex, it isn't something that we really feel comfortable discussing openly. But it is an interesting subject even if uncomfortable.


This is very interesting to me. I guess I never really thought about delving too deeply into the area of our self image as it relates to our sexuality, but your post got me thinking. This could quickly turn into a "rabbit hole" topic because our self image resonates on so many levels within, which in turn influences many decisions made outside our selves. Kind of along the same lines of as above, so below; as within, so 'without'.

My self esteem was molded very early on, being the poor kid in a wealthy school district. We were on welfare, I had to wear thick, heavy glasses and Goodwill hand-me-downs. That's hard on a girl in this culture. Then add to that my single mother had/has the lowest self esteem of any woman I have ever known. She did very little to build my sister and I up, in her mind; what was the point? We were of course doomed to live the same type of life, it's the only cycle she had even seen. As another poster said, I was invisible. I felt invisible and of course had no courage to do anything to change that... so I remained invisible.

My story is far from unique, poor self image is created during childhood and then compounded by our culture's obsession with pushing the Hollywood-ized ideals of beauty and abundance. The "rabbit hole" part of this topic is this: who is it that pushes these ideals onto us? TPTB, period. They have created a world wide epidemic of not good enough! They have done this so stealthily and steadily that we didn't see it coming. Even the beautiful people feel that they aren't abundant enough, those who may have abundance don't feel attractive enough. In the end, you are left with almost an entire world who will do anything, spend anything in order to obtain the ultimate false image. Now here we are, a bunch of sheeple being led around by our mirrors!

ETA: Sex sells in Hollywood and around the world, if we don't have the looks, we usually aquire the abundance in place of them in order to attract mates (we're animals after all, basic instinct). If we have the beauty, we will use that in order to attract a mate. It all stems from a very basic "pack" instinct, the knowledge of the fact that we won't survive on our own. We will do anything to be accepted by the pack. This applies to women as well as men, however it is far more prevelent amongst women simply because we have spent millenia being suppressed.

Sorry, was making dinner and trailed off my original thought process lol!
edit on 2-1-2014 by IrishCream because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 06:36 PM
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reply to post by IrishCream
 


now you understand why i am lingering around this topic.

Ill be back after supper to add further comment.



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 06:55 PM
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bigfatfurrytexan
reply to post by IrishCream
 


now you understand why i am lingering around this topic.

Ill be back after supper to add further comment.


Thanks for the bread crumbs my friend!



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 08:08 PM
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reply to post by IrishCream
 


Supper done, my thoughts.....

....I have a fairly unique viewpoint. Part of it is that I have always been bigger/stronger than everyone around me. So in the world of male alpha mentalities, i was able to "opt out". THe mindset that caused me to not take part in the typical alpha male interactions of pubescent boys is the same mindset that had me evaluate other actions done by myself and others. My parents always told me i had a unique outlook. I don't think it is unique...just not common.

That said, i understand the growing up poor thing. West Texas during the oil bust years of the 80's was nothing to brag about. Either you had or you didn't. We didn't, either. And how the concepts of image can affect a young kid. This is why my "opt out" mentality came into play. I thought it was dumb that I had to fall into societal rules that demanded I possess certain things. I didn't like the game, and chose to not play. No one really had anything to say about it....because I was a 6'2", 300lb 6th grader.

The downside of this mentality is that I am now socially awkward. My wife of 20 years asked me out, and she proposed to me. I am too socially awkward to handle such things, and she knew that. I guess that is why we are perfect together...she understands me enough to overcome my weakness.

But social awkwardness has had its toll on the sexual exploits of a young man. And i have had ample opportunity to think about such matters. It seems to me that modern "beauty" is consumer driven. It isn't about what you got, but about what you can make. Those video's of middle aged korean men that dress up and pass for teen asian girls....that told me what I needed to know about the true superficial nature of beauty. I mean, a middle aged man that passes (in makeup) for a teen? Yeah...unnerving to say the least. You get a nanometer beneath the paint, and the real appearance isn't really there

My wife has to struggle to understand why I worship her "lumps", stretchmarks, and scars. And why I really dislike hair color and makeup. She is twice as beautiful as models when she isn't in her warpaint. And THAT is what I like to appreciate. A real person.



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 08:49 PM
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reply to post by bigfatfurrytexan
 



My wife has to struggle to understand why I worship her "lumps", stretchmarks, and scars. And why I really dislike hair color and makeup. She is twice as beautiful as models when she isn't in her warpaint. And THAT is what I like to appreciate. A real person.


I completely understand this... I prefer a girl that looks amazing without makeup as well...

I can't deal with "fake"

Fake nails, fake hair...fake... body parts... Makeup (war paint
)

Can't stand any of it




posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 08:56 PM
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While I completely agree that society is being fed unrealistic standards of beauty, I think there is this perception out there that women are predominantly the victims of this effort. While it's certainly true that women are practically force fed unrealistic ideas of ideal body image from the time they are little girls (and that is concerning to me as the father of a little girl), People don't often talk about the flipside of the coin. Society does this to men too.




posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 09:21 PM
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reply to post by bigfatfurrytexan
 


Thank you so very much for your unabashed candor, I respect that. In turn I will share because I think our personal experiences go a long way in making sense of this "False Beauty" phenomenon.

I only had 2 boyfriends while I was in school, one when I was in 8th grade who was in 9th, on the wrestling team and never once admitted to a soul that he even knew who I was. If it weren't for complete nievety in the area of sexual mechanics, I would have lost my virginity to him at the age of 14. The 2nd was a year later and I was the one who denied knowing him. I have carried a lot of shame for that because, well obviously because it was a shameful thing to do. After many years of reflection it finally made sense that I did that because I simply thought, with my ego or reptilian brain, that was the way it was done.

With my low self esteem I made the choice to lose my virginity to my cousin's ex-boyfriend who was in competition with his friend to collect virginities. It doesn't get much more ridiculous than that, I was just so tired of being the only girl I knew who was a virgin at age 17 (sad really when I look back at it). There were a few guys in between, every last one of them older than me by at least 5 years, and then I got pregnant to my manager at work who was 16 years older than me and 3 years younger than my mom (my mother could be a "topic" all on her own *sigh*). I had my 1st son at 19 and lived the next 5 years of my life firmly under the thumb of my then husband, had another child and only ever worked when we needed to make ends meet. Even then I only worked where ever he worked. I was told on a regular basis that I was all used up and no one else would ever want me, so I might as well make the best of it... after all, it could be worse.

It wasn't until that relationship was over and I met my 2nd husband that I realized I was actually attractive. While we were dating my 2nd husband bought me contact lenses and clothes that fit me well. We went out on real dates, in public where there were other people. Men would look at me and even hit on me. Instead of being angry, my husband was proud and would tell me I was beautiful. Like you, texan, he seemed to almost worship my stretch marks and baby pouch as he called it. He built me up in ways that I didn't think were even possible. Marriage isn't easy and we have faced more challenges than most, severe financial mostly and then we have a lot of issues with my middle son (2nd hubby adopted my oldest 2 and we have one together). We have seperated a few times and during those seperations I have been less than, eh hem, ladylike if you will.

That is behind me, but it is also something I have carried shame about. But here's the rub, I tried really hard to turn each of those encounters into a relationship. It was like I was obsessed with finding the next best thing, always looking for something better, something grander, the ultimate upgrade if you will. It's simply because I, we, all of us are bombarded with images of the same, something better, grander, the ultimate upgrade or we're just not happy. How could we be happy if we don't have a good looking mate, a beautiful home with all the accessories, a brand new car and of course let's not forget, we can't truly be happy and whole if we're fat and ugly!



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 09:35 PM
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DeadSeraph
While I completely agree that society is being fed unrealistic standards of beauty, I think there is this perception out there that women are predominantly the victims of this effort. While it's certainly true that women are practically force fed unrealistic ideas of ideal body image from the time they are little girls (and that is concerning to me as the father of a little girl), People don't often talk about the flipside of the coin. Society does this to men too.



I abolutely agree with this!!! I am the mothher of 3 sons and I see it every day. My oldest is 18 and a little chunky, he talks about working out on a daily basis, he won't eat a lot of the foods I make because of their calorie or carb content. My middle son is almost 16 and he spends more time in the mirror than I ever have. His hair has to be just so, his clothes have to fit a certain way and he's obsessed with grooming his virtually non-existant facial hair. My husband is balding and wears a baseball cap everywhere he goes except work because he's not allowed. He has put on some weight, just like I have and lately we've been joking about the fact that growing old together must include growing wide together too.

GQ wrote an online article entitled 20% of Anorexics Are Men (other sources quote 5-15%). Men are the largest percentage of steroid, as well as protein and weight gain shake users in order to build muscle mass. Let's not forget all the grooming products out on the market for men today. It's a cultural phenomenon as I have stated. It still affects a much larger percentage of women vs men, but for how much longer given the direction it is sprinting in?!



posted on Jan, 2 2014 @ 11:42 PM
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reply to post by IrishCream
 


With many years together, it would be expected that mates would tend to move towards each other in general outlook. A calibration, or alignment, if you will. This has happened with my wife and I. From her I have learned much about social graces, among other things. From me she has learned to let go and be happy where she is right this minute. I spent a decade telling her, "You don't have it as bad as the ladies in Iraq do with Al Qaida". That whole "As long as we have each other, everything else is just fluff".

Not that either of us is perfect at it, and we always strive to acheive more. But that isn't always about monetary gain.

I guess part of my problem is that in business it IS about money. And I enjoy "keeping score" with the bottom line. An interesting juxtaposition, I guess. I think about that quite a bit....but not deep enough to really disillusion me. I still need to be able to make a living.






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