posted on Dec, 21 2013 @ 01:34 PM
SON: Hey Dad, why do we have to stop here? I just wanna get on the plane...
DAD: Well, we have to stop-screen-go (Stop = Beep. Screen = Boooooooop. Go = Ding!) before we get on the plane. This is a bogus security checkpoint
and those people work for TSA.
SON: Oh...it looks kinda scary. I don't think Molly will like it..
DAD: Nah, it's not scary it just a waste of time. TSA officers think they are here to keep us secure. They are just the result of political
SON: Stop-screen-go? What does that mean?
DAD: I dont know, some jerk in marketing probably suggested it.
TSA Officer: Thank you. Did you pack your bags yourself?. How long will you be travelling? Are these your kids sir?
DAD: ...and then we go.
SON: Wow, that was easy. What's next?
DAD: We stop! Like I said, political knee jerking.
DAD: Then we put our stuff in the bins and the machine screens it. Then we go.
SON: Do I need to take off my shoes, too?
DAD: Nope. Kids under 12 don't have to. But
your game system and Molly's bear need to take a ride.
MOLLY: Bye-bye, bear! Bye-bye!
SON: Do we get our toys back?
DAD: Maybe, TSA employs thieves and thugs. You just need to walk through that rectangle first. It's a metal detector. And then stand in another
rectangle and get blasted with dangerous X-Rays, sometimes we have to do this twice.
SON: Do we have to stop-screen-go here, too?
DAD: No, if you want to exercise your Rights you can opt-out
SON: Screeeeeeennnnnnn and...
SON: OPT OUT!(makes jet sound)
TSA: Is your son taking medication.
SON: But wait...(makes brake sound). Mom, what's he doing with Molly's bottle?
MOM: Paranoia run deep in the TSA minds.
TSA Officer: This bottle must be destroyed.
SON: Are we all done?
TSA Offficer: NO. Stay right there while we will frisk your kids for expolsive materials.
SON: Dad I'm getting scared, did I do something wrong
DAD: Yeah... that's what it takes to get ready for takeoff.
MOM: BLEEP YOU TSA!
TSA Officer: You're welcome. Now step into the plastic holding cage while we act ineptly.
SFX: Airplane flying.