Cat Just Died ;(

I am feeling I need to write something, simply because I am so in shock and numb about what just happened.

We own several cats for years ranging anywhere in numbers from 6 to at times 10.

One of our cats, Seabees, was always a bit sickly and scrawny in appearance and didn't really eat well, but we never considered it a serious condition. It was just how he was.

Today, the cat started vomiting/choking badly in the same way as one of our other cats did a few months ago. (A few months ago, the other cat was also in a terrible shape and started having spasms. We rushed (literally RUSHED) him to the emergency vet at 5am in the morning. He gave her an IV and a shot and it recovered literally within the hour).

So today, one of our other cats started acting like this but not as bad like the one we saved with the vet....for example he was not lying on his side breathing heavily and looking like he was about to die .....so we at first didn't think too much about it. This cat had some problems all the time with sudden choking which we thought was possibly a problem with his teeth. So the occasional choking was something we were used to.

But today it was different. He within a few hours literally "wasted away" and looked terrible. He had that absent look in his eyes like he was just extremely miserable...staring but not really making eye contact.

I WISHED I HAD LEARNED ABOUT CAT CRF (Cat Chronic Kidney Disease) earlier...there was a site where they described the exact same symptoms when a cat is in what they call "meatloaf position" and has this absent stare. But I didn't know about this up until two hours ago...so we still didn't consider it an emergency.

So he looked like he was simply resting/sleeping and very miserable....but what was actually what the site called "crashing" I think, a severe sign of dehydration which would need immediate attention from the vet.

Later on he actually got up and to our surprise he actually drank some water. We KNEW that he needed to drink badly and that he was dehydrated. Then he came back on the couch.

We were certain that he is getting better and assumed he possibly only ate an onion or something so his stomach was upset....pretty sure he will recover, especially since we saw him drinking. And also thinking it's a good sign when they are resting/sleeping.

I went to bed....and my wife fell asleep on the couch. Cat seeming to rest/sleep and we didn't see a sense of emergency.

Wife wakes up at 2:00am rushing into the bedroom telling me Seabees (I still don't even know how his name was spelled, wife came up with the name) is dying.

I though "ARE YOU SERIOUS!?!?!" since we were both confident it was just something minor and temporary.

Get up and he lies on his side, basically in his last breaths, without doubt dying.

Petted him, him with this terrible blank stare in his eyes and he literally died within a few minutes.

JUST PLAIN AWFUL ;(

I feel so terrible and above all NUMB..not being able to being really sad or to cry, still in shock.

This comes about one month after one of our other cats, my favorite cats of all of them who LOVED ME LIKE A GOD vanished without a trace (we suspect another stray cat might have gotten him). We're not even completely over that loss yet ;(

Again I wished I had read about "Feline Chronic Kidney Disease" earlier since it describes all the symptoms and I am pretty sure that's what he had....if I had known all this we wold have rushed him to the vet but we didn't know.

I still cannot believe he died just like that. One day everything's fine, you love them, you feed them, you pet them, you play with them..all happiness ...the next day within hours something happens and he's gone, just a memory is left.

Sometimes I don't UNDERSTAND this universe, I simply don't.

Of course now I/we feel guilty not having gotten to the vet (it was also a money issue) but as said this time at first it didn't look like a real emergency otherwise we would've gone without a question, regardless.

I just feel awful.


RIP Seabees I am so sorry ;(((

Thank you for reading my incoherent writings.

I'm sorry for your loss.

I said prayer for your cat, I hope you don't mind.

Thank you!!

Doesn't sound like you take very good care of your cats. Perhaps you should try 1-2 instead of 6-10. RIP Seabees.

reply to post by goochball


thats not very fair imo. i cant tell you how many times ive rushed a cat to vet only to find out $200 later it was perfectly healthy and i misread what i thought were symptoms. on the other hand a cat can seem perfectly fine, just a little tired, and be dead by morning.. you rush cats to the vet for no reason and they treat u like a hysterical parent. its a VERY hard line to walk knowing what should really worry you and what you should accept as just a phaze or a personality quirk etc.

gal

reply to post by NoRulesAllowed


so sorry to hear of your loss, my thoughts are with your family, human and feline, who im sure are all mourning

gal

sorry to hear ... loosing a pet is the WORST ... put my dog down this summer ... totally stinks. In a weird way, it's worse than dealing with human death because you can't explain to the animal what's happening and why they're in pain or not feeling well.

so sad.. BUT... each day get's a little better, and you'll never forget the memories your furry friend gave you and those are the things to cherish!

Curiousgal
reply to post by goochball

 

thats not very fair imo. i cant tell you how many times ive rushed a cat to vet only to find out $200 later it was perfectly healthy and i misread what i thought were symptoms. on the other hand a cat can seem perfectly fine, just a little tired, and be dead by morning.. you rush cats to the vet for no reason and they treat u like a hysterical parent. its a VERY hard line to walk knowing what should really worry you and what you should accept as just a phaze or a personality quirk etc.

gal

Yes it's difficult. Now I wish I would know more about such conditions like CRF so you *know* when an emergency comes up ;( Our vet is VERY good, as said the last time when he literally saved the other cat from dying, I was 100% convinced he wouldn't make it when I saw him laying and panting in his carrier. He lay on his side breathing like his last breaths. He got some shots and an IV and staid the entire day at the vet's for observation..basically from the second he got the shots he got better. It was amazing.

Even with that being an emergency (we had to call the vet at 5am) and him staying there the entire day, it all just costs €80.

We care for our cats (basically we have four now and one which only comes in at night to eat/sleep)...we care for them ABOVE and before ourselves! We just joked yesterday that our cats don't even know what "hunger" is, I would spend my last penny on cat-food or cat-care before ourselves, I kid you not.

I lost my last cat a month ago and still feel the pain of that loss. I have lost many precious animals through the years and know exactly what you are going through. I am so very sorry your beloved kitty is gone. I believe Seabee is now pain free and running beneath the golden sun and tall trees just waiting until you meet again. RIP sweet Seabee.

reply to post by NoRulesAllowed


Take comfort in the fact that he had the best life he could ever have had in this lifetime with your family.
People(parents) that loved and cared for him like no other, and brothers and sisters in the same house.

Blessings, not losses.

I have put humans in body bags after passing and I can deal with humans, for most part.

Dogs and Cats...intelligent animals as pets and even not so intelligent.....
I am a wreck! It is the utmost gutwrenching emotional (I don't have the other words to explain)
thing.
They are dependent on us to protect them and take care of them. THEIR LOVE IS UNCONDITIONAL!

I don't want to make this too long because I can. I can understand what you may be going through, but I have no idea what you are feeling nor does anyone else know!

I will pray for your family and you and your best friend is now at peace, and so grateful for you.

It's no one's fault and I am sorry for your loss. We had a dog do almost the same thing and when we thought she had recovered, she went downhill super fast. That's how it happens sometimes. It's like having a baby in the way that they can not tell you where they hurt, what symptoms they are having, etc. You have to guess and they do get sick often times like people. One day they are fine, the next day they are sick, in 24 more hours it's like they were never sick at all.

Anybody that has ever had a pet that they loved has experienced the great feeling of loss when they are gone. The only comfort you can take away is knowing that you gave them the best life you could and they gave you the best love they could.

Again... I am sorry for your loss. It is always hard and don't let anybody make you think it's silly to grieve over an animal. I see that too often. What you are feeling is normal and you did what you thought was best. It's all any of us can do in any situation.

reply to post by PRS395


Animal love is something special and I guess it's hard to explain for anyone who doesn't like animals. There ARE people who have no respect for them, it's the most awful thing.

It's so very difficult to explain to people who don't have pets I think.

Just two days ago I read somewhere, below a picture of a dog:

"FOR YOU, HE MAY ONLY BE A SMALL PART OF YOUR LIFE. FOR HIM, YOU ARE HIS ALL AND HIS EVERYTHING."

This is so true.

The one cat which is missing for a month now, he spend literally hours every day head-butting me, standing right in front of me on my desk, staring at me like a god when I am on the computer. I have NEVER EVER experienced such unconditional love from a being.

There is something "empowering" and good about giving love and respect to an animal.

I read a bunch of spiritual books not too long ago, in one even it was claimed that love towards animals is especially highly regarded in "the afterlife" - regardless what your or my view/religion/belief may be.

The realization that the pets depend so much on us and are entirely on our mercy...and it's our choice to love them and to be respectful to them.

I'm very sorry. It's such a kick in the teeth - we had it 6 months ago with our first dog - he had lymphoma his last few months and had the stare on and off for a month or so, I kind of got used to it after a while. But I have never gotten used to the horrible separation.

I find a lot of comfort for this in songs. You said "just a memory is left". I don't know if you know this song; it's Neil Young, the song is "It's a Dream". I like these words from it -

It's a dream
Only a dream
And it's fading now
Fading away
It's only a dream
Just a memory without anywhere to stay

The last line says it so well for me - I have this wonderful memory of him that just kind of doesn't have a home now - nowhere for it to stay. When you said that, my heart felt sad for you (and me) and though I rarely post anymore, I told myself I would send you this link:

www.youtube.com...

My dog, Charlie, was my best friend. This last 6 months has been like a dream. Since this just happened and you are grieving heavily now, please know that there is at least one person who feels your pain.

Eric D.
Seattle

So sorry for your loss!
I just lost my all time favorite cat less than two months ago.
Had him for 15 years, he was a stray.
Smartest cat I ever knew!
Very in tune with what kind of day I was having too.
A lot like the one of yours that went missing.

It's so very hard to lose them.
It's so empty around here without him!
We have another young one,
but she doesn't interact with us much,
or want to cuddle like the other one did!

Try not too feel too guilty about not knowing.
Just because the other one recovered,
doesn't mean that this one would have too.

What gave me some consolation when mine died,
was that I was with him when he went.
What if you had taken him to the vet,
& he died during the night, all alone,
scared & wondering where you were!

To me, that would have been a lot worse to live with!
Try to think of the good life he had with you!
There's nothing as priceless as the unconditional love of a pet!
WOQ

I want to add something, also in memoriam for Seabees.

Ever since we got cats we had a problem with some of the males at some time disappearing or running away. I talked to a vet one day about it and he said that it's actually pretty normal for some males to disappear, he jokingly said it like "when they find an attractive female" somewhere else.

So several years later, we had the same problem and we're still wondering WHERE they go..why they disappear...whether someone is taking them or doing bad things to them. We simply do not know. For example, we also do not know where some of the cats go during the day, like the one who only comes home at night. He is VERY well fed and looks very clean. I already spent countless hours during the day to look for where the cats are hiding or going but I never figured out where they are. It's still a mystery to me. This is a very tiny town with lots of empty homes/apartments.

I do however know that in this small town there are MANY stray cats and some of them I know for several years already. They live "out on the streets" but they are fine, some people feed them even. So I know that this little town is "cat safe" when stray cats can be around for so long and are doing fine.

Now...Seabees and Gabriel(s) were amongst two cats which about three years ago simply "disappeared". Again, no idea where to or why. Gabriels we never saw again.

I think about an entire year went by, and at that time we still had a bunch of cats anyway. Basically, we have really given up or forgotten about Seabees and Gabriels.

One day, one year after, I am sitting there and look at the Window (we have this small Window where cats go in and out all the time)...and couldn't believe my eyes....there was Seabees!

He looked very thin, basically a skeleton with some fur (awful...) and wasted and we had a very hard time to even recognize him again. But of course we fed him and he got better and from thereon he never left again. So to remember him, that he was already gone once for a long time and "magically" appeared again and totally stunned us when he all of a sudden came back from wherever he went....

My other cat, pretty much same thing, the cat we're missing now for about a month.

When he was still very young, one day he simply disappeared. Obviously we searched around and made-up scenarios but we never could explain why he would simply leave.

A neighbor of ours came over one day and claimed he had seen him. We were kind of hesitant to believe it since some cats look very similar, so we went to a home where he *thought* he saw him, but it was not him.

About 6 months later...my wife comes home from grocery shopping...with the cat in her hands!! He spent 6 months out on the streets and we found him near a dumpster looking for food 1/4 of a mile away. He is/was a very fragile and tiny cat and we're still stunned he made it out there for many months on its own. He too then never left again for 2 years. So obviously now we still have a tiny shimmer of hope that he MIGHT still be out there after he is gone now for about a month. On the other hand we have one VERY evil stray cat which makes our cat's life hell. This cat comes into the apt complex and starts attacking ours....often even it climbs up to the window. So my suspicion is that something happened especially since my wife reported one day before he was missing having seen the evil stray cat fighting him. Obviously I do not want to ask neighbors since I am not keen on the idea that someone did indeed find him...and I want to keep the shimmer of hope alive that he might still be out there somewhere.

wasobservingquietly

What gave me some consolation when mine died,
was that I was with him when he went.
What if you had taken him to the vet,
& he died during the night, all alone,
scared & wondering where you were!

To me, that would have been a lot worse to live with!
Try to think of the good life he had with you!
There's nothing as priceless as the unconditional love of a pet!
WOQ

You are so right! The idea is horrible since I know we would have to leave him at the vet keeping him there for observation, like we did with the other cat. Of course I petted him and talked to him in his last moments but he was really very out of it, but of course I HOPE i was able to give him at least some comfort, somehow. But you are right, the idea of him dying away at the vet is even worse ;(

I'm so sorry for your loss. This spring I had to put my 17yr old cat to sleep. He declined more gradually and was in and out of the vet his last month. I had to give him medicine, purée his food with water, and clean up his messes. I had a 3 week old baby and I feel guilty because I just couldn't take care of him anymore with a newborn. For days I would glance in his usual spots then remember he wouldn't be there. Losing a pet is losing a loved one, losing a family member.

Just know that his suffering was brief. He was home with you and not on a cold metal table.

reply to post by PeachyDoodle


I cannot even imagine the loss for people who have cats for so long although my ex-in-laws had one I think for 20+ years and we once had a dog also for a VERY long time.

Our cats, the female (she's ironically a rather tiny black one), the mom of all of the other cats, I guess she is seven. The others are far younger, anywhere from 3-4 years.

This makes this even more "mystical" to think about it that, say, four years ago..seabees and the others didn't even exist yet. But of course it doesn't make the loss or grief "easier", I actually cried today the first time in, what, decades. (I must be getting old....)

All of them, without an exception, have a VERY, VERY specific and unique character and persona.

I wonder whether non-pet people even realize that. But they are so different in their behaviour, sometimes it's even almost funny.

Seabees was a cat who always looked pi**sed, he had this unique look on his face and often spent his day just sitting on the kitchen counter...with this (apparent) look on his face "OMG, I hate you all" watching whatever went on in the home Of course we know this was just how he appeared to look...but I will miss that a lot. He was also CRAZY for milk! Of course giving milk to cats is a bad thing (shouldn't be done at all actually) but he often barely touched his food...often....he literally took out single tiny pieces of Friskies from the bowl, one after the other, took one piece out and ate it...then grabbed another one WITH HIS PAWS to take it out first...ate it etc. But he was crazy for milk so I always gave him very, very little of milk and he went totally gaga over it.

I am still amazed how the cats are so different and unique in their behaviour which really makes them unique "persona" in a sense. I am pretty sure this is also one reason why the shock is so big when something happens all-of-a-sudden..it's simply IMPOSSIBLE to see a pet as "just an animal"...they really become part of your family, whether they are with you 2 years, 10 years or 20. A joy/blessing which makes life so much more rich.


Also..sorry for your loss of course - and all the others who posted who lost pets!

Sorry for your loss, I too have lost animals I loved in the past. Sorry for your loss I know the feeling. Peace

I feel ya, my friend. I lost both my cats this year -- one to renal failure (Ranger, 7) in January, and one to a coyote (Nikka, 3) in July. Said coyote is no longer with us either [a-hem!].

In any case, it does leave a hole...