Escape from Christian Fundamentalism - the Kids Who Flee Abusive, Isolated Christian Homes

reply to post by scolai

It breaks my heart to know that a child of any home, religious or otherwise, has to go through abuse from the people that they should be able to trust more than anyone else ... especially if it's for some roundabout sociopathic logic that somehow it would make them a better person.

I'm sorry that it was painful for you to read. It should be painful for EVERYONE...in my opinion.
It's all too 'real', and it breaks my heart as well.

You are brave to speak up, and I appreciate it.

ketsuko
Dear Lord! I must abusive without even realizing it.

I am Christian.

I am seriously considering homeschooling.

Why? Because I no longer trust the public schools to actually teach a child to think logically or critically. Instead, they indoctrinate. Many kids coming out public school can barely read and write, let alone do basic math. I just can't understand why any parent would want their child in that sort of education system.

But of course, you know better. I just want to abuse my child. Thanks for clearing that up.

Are you washing your hands of the responsibility as a parent to ensure your children are getting the education your taxes are paying for?

Just because a child goes to ANY school, regardless of whether it's a Public or Private school, doesn't absolve the parent from any accountability regarding the education of their child.

If you don't keep your children interested in the education on offer in public school and cover grounds you don't think are being covered adequately enough in the education they're currently getting, it's a sure sign they'll certainly miss out and lose on any number X other concentrations in education in homeschooling if you're NOT HELPING THEM NOW.

School doesn't start and stop at the curb.
Critical thinking, and other tools for learning need carry over into the home.

If it's that important, pulling the children out of Public School isn't going to help if they're not already getting it at home.

If anything, pulling children out of Public School often marginalizes them in retarding their social development; a developmental necessity when it comes to future success in interacting with their peers in whichever/whatever career they find themselves.
Further, social development and exposure helps them in making all the ordinary social mistakes in such areas as good friends, bad friends, terrible dating decisions, trust and betrayal scenarios when they don't really count as opposed to making/experiencing those mistakes/social landmarks as an Adult when and where the consequences can be much more dire and all the more devestating.

reply to post by wildtimes


Klassified said it best when he labeled it as "extreme fundamentalism". There is a difference. Adhering to the Bible is fundamental. Using it to control every aspect of someone else's life, other than your own, is extreme.

reply to post by AliceBleachWhite

Further, social development and exposure helps them in making all the ordinary social mistakes in such areas as good friends, bad friends, terrible dating decisions, trust and betrayal scenarios when they don't really count as opposed to making/experiencing those mistakes/social landmarks as an Adult when and where the consequences can be much more dire and all the more devestating.

This ^^^ bears repeating.

Deetermined
reply to post by sweetstuff

 

Mental illness breeds mental illness, not fundamentalism. I bet if you did a little research on your past experiences growing up, you'd find all kinds mental dysfunction within the people you were surrounded by that made you feel less than worthy of being human. I bet you would have had a different experience inside of a different "congregation" of people.

The black and white thinking from man made religion breeds hate and fundamentalism is the cornerstone of dualistic approach to understanding "what is" including god. Do you really think Jesus would be hateful to two gay people who where in love? Who do you think Jesus would side with when a child is screwed over by religious dogma and will forever hate the religion he was bought up with?

Fundamentalism is pushing people away from unity with god/Jesus/spirituality (on the Christian and Muslim path) because of the dogma. Thank god (in a praising way toward Jehovah/"the existing One") that there are other views that can bring those souls home without the need of the man made fundamentalistic views.

Namaste

reply to post by Deetermined


Forcing a child to adhere to the bible is abuse because they are not granted the right to choose for themselves.

reply to post by Deetermined

Adhering to the Bible is fundamental. Using it to control every aspect of someone else's life, other than your own, is extreme.

Agreed.

How old do you think the Earth is, Dee?
Do you believe the Adam and Eve story is literal?

Do you believe in "original sin"?

reply to post by wildtimes


What if parents choose NOT to install religion in their children? Let them grow up and learn empathy for other living things instead. Maybe you've heard of the golden rule? If they want, they can choose a religion on their own. The religious doctrine has compelling value and should stand on its own --right?

I think religious parents should carefully consider that question. If you have to manipulate and force the kids your ideas are flawed, inconsistent and cruel from the standpoint of the human. Kids inherently understand that.

So, tell me about the religion that kids naturally gravitate to on their own. Maybe that's the one that will change my mind?

reply to post by InverseLookingGlass

What if parents choose NOT to install religion in their children? Let them grow up and learn empathy for other living things instead.

That's what I did with mine.

Maybe you've heard of the golden rule? If they want, they can choose a religion on their own. The religious doctrine has compelling value and should stand on its own --right?

Right. Why are you thinking I haven't heard of The Golden Rule?

I think religious parents should carefully consider that question. If you have to manipulate and force the kids your ideas are flawed, inconsistent and cruel from the standpoint of the human. Kids inherently understand that.

Correct.

So, tell me about the religion that kids naturally gravitate to on their own. Maybe that's the one that will change my mind?

Change your mind about what?

My two kids (now in their early/mid twenties) were raised with the Golden Rule, and we gardened, had animals, took care of our small acreage, etc......

CHILDREN do not have the capacity to choose a "religion" until they are AT LEAST in their teens...
and even then, their brains are physically not 'fully developed'.

reply to post by sweetstuff

Forcing a child to adhere to the bible is abuse because they are not granted the right to choose for themselves.

I hope teaching a child to live by the ten commandments isn't considered abuse.

reply to post by Deetermined


Dee, have you even looked at the sources I posted? This is real whether or not you want to admit it.

Of course it isn't abuse to teach children "THE GOLDEN RULE" (which is what the 10 commandments are all about - and, btw, they aren't original to 'the Bible').

Would you kindly answer the questions I asked in my last to you?

Christopher Hitchens can express how I feel much better than myself.

Just listen to this.



He is so right.

reply to post by Deetermined


it's not... but it's far worse to let the state parent a child.



There is unrest in the forest,
There is trouble with the trees,
For the maples want more sunlight
And the oaks ignore their pleas.
And the trees are all kept equal. by hatchet, axe, and saw...

reply to post by boymonkey74


atheism just can not express how they feel period... atheist like Hitchens always need someone to do it for them.

the answers are not in science, it's the wrong hemisphere, one can not use arithmetic to determine morality.

reply to post by SisyphusRide


Sorry didn't read...All I heard was Blah blah blah. (take a hint eh?)

Back to the OP

Iam glad people are coming forward telling us their personal stories, very brave and noble of you all.
I hope that this thread will put a thought in religious peoples heads with kids, they are individuals yes you can teach them about religion but at least teach them about all religion not just the one you follow.
Otherwise you may regret it when they rebel against you.

reply to post by SisyphusRide

one can not use arithmetic to determine morality.

Nor can they use 'the Bible' for it, unless they selectively overlook the barbaric acts of the "God" therein described.

Didn't you have a post or thread about something you were working on, and ask for your readers to be patient? Better get back to it!

reply to post by wildtimes


that's not entirely correct... the Truth is in the bible.

some just do not have the gift to understand it... others are not good with things like grammar.

reply to post by boymonkey74

I hope that this thread will put a thought in religious peoples heads with kids, they are individuals yes you can teach them about religion but at least teach them about all religion not just the one you follow.
Otherwise you may regret it when they rebel against you.

I hope so, too.

Teach them about ALL religions. If homeschooling, use sites like www.patheos.com... and www.religionfacts.com...

SisyphusRide
reply to post by boymonkey74

 

atheism just can not express how they feel period... atheist like Hitchens always need someone to do it for them.

the answers are not in science, it's the wrong hemisphere, one can not use arithmetic to determine morality.

I, as an Atheist, disagree with your position and say so on my own, for myself, by myself, without any help or assistance from anyone.

As to Morality, and how such is quantified; It's pretty evident, arithmetic or no, whatever these Fundamentalist Religious homeschoolers are using to tally such is more akin to ABUSE than anything even remotely resembling anything such as might could be even remotely defined as "Morality".

reply to post by wildtimes


Here in the UK we used to have RE lessons in high school and they were all about Christianity, I complained saying I wanted to learn about other religions Buddhism, Shintoism etc My RE teacher sent me out of class, I went home told my Dad and he came into school and kicked off.
I never had to do RE lessons again but luckly the Library had plenty of books I could read about those religions.
Any religious teaching to kids should include as many as possible, then the Child can make up his/her own mind.
Great thread Wild as usual