reply to post by Lunette
I want something cosmic and beautiful.
Don't we all,
Well, I really like the idea of something special.
Change what something special means to you.
get a job, get married, have kids/no kids, and die.
Getting a job is special, you find a place in the community where you contribute in some sort of way.
You find a way getting income for the work you do and don't wait for hand outs that way.
Getting married is extremely special,having kids even more so.
You seem to have a negative outlook and find what many would hope experience as merely normal.
there is no normal when it come to the diversity of life.
I want to be able to walk around in public and feel that there is a rift between me and the rest of the average/predictable world.
You are a part of it,
If you want to separate from what you are a part of for selfish reasons (your wants) you might be hurting yourself and those influenced by your
I never shout out loud, I'm very shy and reserved. I can be a chatter box of course when others talk to me, but I don't actively seek out social
situations, I'm sort of an introvert.
I am very introverted, I don't seek out social interaction, Joining ATS was one but it is anonymous and you really are not meeting people,
This vague description of your social stance is almost identical to mine.
When I said to shout, I meant at yourself and your thoughts, like if they upset you and you cannot control them, try interacting with your feelings by
voicing them to yourself, if you upset about feeling a certain put a firm tone in your voice and tell yourself, be gone with you vile thoughts
poisoning my mind, find a way you communicate with your feelings so to be able to debate with them and if you can find reason why you should be in
control you should be able to sweep these thoughts away as though they were nothing but dust on a window making it harder to see whats outside.
I try and block these thoughts away by forcing new images, or apologizing to myself in some way.
try to block them, if that is not working maybe look to try understand those feeling deeper then.
Don't feel sorry for yourself, you create your own happiness and sorrow.
The more sorrow you feel for yourself the more helpless you will be, then to use force to apply new images if it works will only cover what still
lurking behind will it not?
with deeper understanding of these feelings we get we can overpower how much attention our minds give to them.
they (our dark and evil thoughts)will always be with us as we look at things through the dualistic principle,
understanding these thoughts and the necessity of these concepts to bring balance will eventually help you overcome any hurdle before you.
Sorry, if this is all nonsense, I don't seem to explain things very well.
None whatsoever, look up at the nonsense that I have just posted, if you can make something of it and it maybe helps you well then I might not be
that lost after all. You see, I can tell my dark thoughts to leave but I feel just as lost as any other person on this journey of life.
I have a strange connecting feeling to what you are saying here in this thread and felt obligated to reply with my own personal view of what I am
interpreting you saying and feeling and offer some solutions, not really solutions but ideas if you have not tried or thought of them.
Its a hard subject to discuss where all in the discussion will be on the same page,
we are all individual spirits/souls that have that spark or connection to each other and the source of everything, so we all have our own
I believe I understood your stance and you explained well enough, even though it is fairly vague, I just seemed to connect to what you wrote.