Above All [NOV2013]

Above All [NOV2013]
BY: [Writer] Ldyserenity

I guess I should start at the beginning; even though I have left plenty of texts to anybody who’d care to read it. Maybe it wasn't too clear though, and besides it’s been translated and incorrectly interpreted too many times to count, that I think it could use some clarification. Before me I know not what was, or would be, I knew nothing but darkness and awareness. I just wanted more than anything not to be alone, but alone is what I was. From nothing, I had a thought to light the darkness and it was. Whatever I thought would or could possibly be, was just like that, and it’s how I kept myself sane, and how I could possibly discover what I was and why I existed. Was there any thought behind me becoming? And if so where was the origin of this thought? Was it so distant from me that I could not see it? Was I the only? It’s still very much a mystery to me. And for that I am sorry.



What I do know is that like any being that first realizes that they are aware, I sought an answer. But more importantly, I didn’t want to be alone, and what else does a being want, but love and adoration, so I began my work, selfishly creating beings made of light that were entirely made to worship and adore me. What would you have done? Of course you’d do the same. Isn’t that all that any being with awareness wants most? Unfortunately, this was not as satisfying as is too painfully obvious when other beings have no other choice but to love you. You know it’s because you have created them only to serve that purpose alone. It’s especially a bland flavor of love. None of them would ever dare go against me or question my authority ever. They couldn’t possibly, you see, they did all that I wanted them to do. Was I angered when one of them did question me? Of course not, I was angry because that is exactly what I wanted that being to do. I couldn’t exactly destroy that being, now could I? I mean the being only was there to please me. Even though I didn’t exactly know what it was I was looking for at that time. So what did I do? I cast the being into whatever darkness remained, where the light never touched. It wasn’t because I was angry, but it was more that the being was a reminder at how I failed myself. I mean there is absolutely no chance of learning anything of value if everything that you created just adores you and obeys you mindlessly. That was what I learned right off the bat. Don’t worry about the being that was cast to the darkness. That being is just alone as I was but still loves me very much, it could do nothing less, as it was created specifically for that purpose. I sent that being out because the being’s love for me was the strongest, and I know that being is somewhere else creating it’s own beautiful creation, learning same as I did what it’s purpose is. You see, now that being has it’s own kingdom. And only that being could have done it.


After that I knew there had to be someone that I could give free reign to, to give choice to, to give freewill to, because without that how can one learn to be loving and caring? First you must be loved without force, is that not true of any being? So I thought of a place where the new beings could reside, with their freedom of choice, and the place was made and the beings placed there with other beautiful creatures with no thought, just instinct. These beings never lived in some paradise having been handed everything in life. What kind of parent gives their children everything they want? A unknowing one. No, life was tough, especially tough in those days. But I spoke to these beings at night to let them know that it would be alright, that they were learning, just as I was. They were becoming something better. They would grow and expand to heights that I had wished for them. They were, after all just infants in the world. They were new to this, and they had an advantage. They could not just conjure up beings to love them they had to find someone who would without force, they had to bring other beings into existence in their union to each other, and their species all depended on it. Not just instinct alone like the lower creations, but through connections and bonds and unity. But lately I’ve grown so weary because they have not learned from their mistakes, it’s been a very long time and they still haven’t changed much from the first generation. They are still petty, and violent, and destructive. Which leads me to question whether I should scrap the first draft and start anew? With my beings of light, I couldn't possibly have done that, because they have never done anything wrong. They do what they’re made to do. The other beings with the freewill however have been left instructions on how they could be but instead they remain awful like a rebellious child. Some think that I have abandoned them. This is not true. I could never abandon my children. I just stopped talking when they stopped listening. So here is where I am at right now. I think that I learned all I need to know, that there is no answer as to how I came to be or why. I simply am and always will be. And all my creations are not real, they are shadows on the wall of my mind, and the only thing that I can possibly ever learn from them is that no matter how things work out, I will always be alone. So why am I here? It’s not a simple thing to answer. Maybe it was a horrible accident, nothing more than a misfired proton in a dark endless unfeeling void, somehow making me aware without any other thing aware to even notice. Now what do I do with that? I’ve seen life for my creations end so many ways, yet I will never know how to end my own awareness. That means if I destroy all I’ve created, I will have nothing once again. Oh sure I could create much better things I’m sure. But I’d much rather see what my beings create. Someday if I’m lucky, they’ll create something better than I could have ever imagined.

Well done! That may be the saddest story I've read here. Maybe the All That Is should have made himself/herself a sibling, since they could make whatever they imagined. Great concept........ what if God has no imagination. Good story!

reply to post by ldyserenity


Nice. But I hate you! Kidding! I jest!

I was working a rough draft with the same basic premise. It was tentatively titled "The God complex."

Oh well...The early bird gets the worm. Back to the drawing board. Curses! Foiled again.

reply to post by TDawgRex

Go ahead do your own take on it, I'd like to read that!!
I think just because someone else uses the idea, doesn't mean you should scrap it.

reply to post by ldyserenity


Your story was to close to mine or visa-versa. I have some other ideas though. It was a good read. But if I may, please break it up a little bit into paragraphs. My old eyes were straining.

reply to post by TDawgRex


yeah I typed it in word and I have no idea why they don't keep that spacing it's annoying. :/ I'll fix it up back to what it was in word.

reply to post by ldyserenity


I quite liked it but if you meant it as an exploration of deity, God, in the Judaeo-Christian view was always in community with Himself and so would never be lonely.

And humankind was a creation borne of joy and sharing, not out of loneliness.

None the less, I like your writing style, expression, and emotive speculation (wish I were half as good).

TDawgRex
reply to post by ldyserenity

 

Your story was to close to mine or visa-versa. I have some other ideas though. It was a good read. But if I may, please break it up a little bit into paragraphs. My old eyes were straining.

And Creepy it's like that story wrote itself for me, so, ummm...spooky maybe it's a sign? Or just a coincidence?

And I fixed the spacing.

chr0naut
reply to post by ldyserenity

 

I quite liked it but if you meant it as an exploration of deity, God, in the Judaeo-Christian view was always in community with Himself and so would never be lonely.

And humankind was a creation borne of joy and sharing, not out of loneliness.

None the less, I like your writing style, expression, and emotive speculation (wish I were half as good).

It was not based on Judeo Christian more of my own perspective of how an Observer alone in the Universe may feel/express and create.