It looks like you're using an Ad Blocker.

Please white-list or disable AboveTopSecret.com in your ad-blocking tool.

Thank you.

 

Some features of ATS will be disabled while you continue to use an ad-blocker.

 

Are you having a "I hate my job" day? Easy way to get over it!

page: 1
13

log in

join
share:

posted on Nov, 8 2013 @ 09:26 AM
link   
When you have an 'I Hate My Job day'
[Even if you're retired, you sometimes have those days]
Try this out:
On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy
and go to the thermometer section and
purchase a rectal thermometer made
by Johnson & Johnson.

Be very sure you get this brand.
When you get home, lock your doors,
draw the curtains and disconnect the phone
so you will not be disturbed.

Change into very comfortable clothing and sit in your favourite chair.
Open the package and remove the thermometer.
Now, carefully place it on a table or a surface so that it will not become chipped or broken.
Now the fun part begins.
Take out the literature from the box and read it carefully.
You will notice that, in small print, there is a statement:


''Every Rectal Thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson is Personally Tested and then sanitized''.

Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times,' I am so glad I do not work in the thermometer quality control department at
Johnson & Johnson.'

HAVE A NICE DAY; AND REMEMBER, THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE WITH A JOB THAT IS MORE OF A PAIN IN THE ARSE THAN YOURS!
...Remember, if you haven't got a smile on your face and laughter in your heart....

Maybe you should go and work for Johnson & Johnson!!!!!




posted on Nov, 8 2013 @ 09:30 AM
link   
I know some guys who would enjoy this job



posted on Nov, 8 2013 @ 09:31 AM
link   
reply to post by Teye22
 


I think you read my mind.

Bend over I need laugh

*Snaps on gloves*

Cody



posted on Nov, 8 2013 @ 09:44 AM
link   
reply to post by Teye22
 


You deserved a star and flag for making me lol.
You also deserve a reprimand for waking my wife and the mess of coffee on my keyboard.
Shame on you!



posted on Nov, 8 2013 @ 10:11 AM
link   

g146541
reply to post by Teye22
 


You deserved a star and flag for making me lol.
You also deserve a reprimand for waking my wife and the mess of coffee on my keyboard.
Shame on you!


MOUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Everytime I read it I start laughing again! I am buying one just to read it for real. lol



posted on Nov, 8 2013 @ 10:16 AM
link   
Just want to add another job, most people wouldn't want.

Do you know at zoos there are people that relieve the animals, sexually. Yep, have fun with that Tiger, he is about to become your best friend.



posted on Nov, 8 2013 @ 10:20 AM
link   

kmb08753
Just want to add another job, most people wouldn't want.

Do you know at zoos there are people that relieve the animals, sexually. Yep, have fun with that Tiger, he is about to become your best friend.



Never mind the Tiger, I wouldn't want to handle the Elephant.....get outa the way when he's done....woa!!!!!

this is just discusting I must say!

Another duh Job from way back.....

The guy holding the Drums on a battle field, what the hell did he do to deserve the drum?!?



posted on Nov, 8 2013 @ 11:06 AM
link   
I used to hate my job. Now I`m my own boss and I`m loving it



posted on Nov, 8 2013 @ 08:08 PM
link   
reply to post by Teye22
 





The guy holding the Drums on a battle field, what the hell did he do to deserve the drum?!?


Sorry but that made me rofl. I've always wondered that too.



posted on Nov, 8 2013 @ 09:37 PM
link   
I got my husband to read it because he had one of those days.

Flaw in the plan.

He is actually a quality control guy.

His response -

"They were probably testing them on dogs."

Sometimes, he's no fun at all.



posted on Nov, 8 2013 @ 10:49 PM
link   
Actually, I work as an arborist, (otherwhise known as a tree surgeon,) on a, not quite daily basis I get, either whipped across the face by a branch as its moved, or have a limb as big or bigger than a baseball bat suddenly swing whilst going into the chipper and knock me stumbling. If a thermometer is that scary, then you have really experienced a small, very small window of reality. Thought I must admit, I really hope I never have to see someone pull out one of those thermos, cause it can't be pleasant.



posted on Nov, 9 2013 @ 12:26 AM
link   
Hahaha that is just great, you made me chuckle ever-so-slightly, or even somewhat moderately

No suppos's unless im backed up for a whole month, thermometers, or anything rectally of-the-like inserterd, oh wait, i'm not 80 so nevermind! LOL


Exit only Mo Fo's



posted on Nov, 12 2013 @ 10:39 AM
link   

ketsuko
I got my husband to read it because he had one of those days.

Flaw in the plan.

He is actually a quality control guy.

His response -

"They were probably testing them on dogs."

Sometimes, he's no fun at all.


lol.....I mean OMG poor dogs! What are the odds that a quality control person would read this post...lolll

Priceless!



posted on Nov, 13 2013 @ 01:08 AM
link   
reply to post by Teye22
 


That's a #ty job, but to make this more terrible it was usually children who played those drums. Boys that were too young to enlist were often old enough to join as a drummer, and yes they marched right into gun fire often being the targets as drummers were used to signal the troops of various movements.



posted on Nov, 13 2013 @ 04:18 PM
link   
reply to post by Teye22
 


Priceless!
Thanks for the laugh!
I would also hate to be the person responsible for clearing a dogs anal glands. It the grossest thing that I have ever encountered, and I've been pooped on, puked on and peed on.



new topics

top topics



 
13

log in

join