Real Estate Agents are Da Debbil!!!

So, We have decided to sell our super cool restored historic home and move to a crappy little house on a ton of land. Or something like that. Our plan is to list this coming Spring.
We have a RE agent out last month to see what we need to do to make it more appealing in this crap market. SHe claims that a house like ours always has a market, but gives us little hints on "staging" the house. So I have been doing those things.... and its killing me. I collect things.. I have a very eclectic collection of junk Ive accumulated over the years. She claims that my collection may "scare off potential buyers". My junk is awesome... you devil woman! I had to pack my pickled punk, my 2 headed mouse in a dome, my gaff of a glory hand... I even had to pack my stinkin memento mori pic collection!! I mean, who DOESNT like collecting dead people?!
SO she came out this morning to give me some brochures on these historic colors from a few companies. I need to repaint a few things that I had painted garish colors in the 2 youngest kids' rooms. The one room is a hot pink nightmare. Anyway, she walks in and smiles at my BARE living room. My BARE dining room. My BARE bathroom. My BARE receiving room. My oldests' BARE bedroom. My BARE kitchen. This devil bitch looks at my ONE curio cabinet I have not put in storage and smiles.. just a few medical collectibles and middle of the road crap. My builti in only has tea pots in it now! I cry.. she smiles. Evil. She asked about the reworking of the psychomanteum and I took her upstairs to show her.. and she gave me this disapproving look my grandmother used to give me. People dont like dead animals on the wall she says. I say theyre professionally done mounts.. NOT merely dead animals. I already packed the dead animals.. you real estate harridan. She says potential buyers may not like to see hunting trophies.. aka dead animals.. on the wall. dammit. She didnt mention the coffin blanket in the antique baby buggy though. Its unused so maybe that threw her off. Ill never tell. I have 5 bedrooms here.. full of wonderful treasures. Well, I DID anyway.

....so this devil person is basically making me HATE living in my own home and Im here for months. I didnt take her in the basement to the fam room though. MUHAHAHA!!!


Whats wrong with you potential buyers? You DONT know people live in these houses youre looking at to buy?! Freakin norms... vanilla typicals... stick to your new construction McMansions!

Whew.. rant over. I feel better. ATS and its free therapy.. gotta love it.

reply to post by Advantage


Throw in the collection and ill make an offer.

Also.. I don't trust re agents or land appraisers. A friend had some land appraised and they guy said 54, 000 max and my friend set his own price and has people making serious offers at the 90, 000. Never trust someone that could be paid to do theur job poorly by someone else.

reply to post by Advantage


Seeing other people's stuff is the nature of the beast in that business.
I understand trying to appeal to others but on the other side of it...I try to never worry about what people think.....people don't think often enough for me to take seriously.

Get a less pretentious real estate agent and give this one the boot or just tell her to be quiet and do her job and sell the house.
She is getting paid to sell the house...not run her mouth.

I deal with real estate agents fairly often and the amount of times i have said the words "eff off or eff you" is too many times to count but it shuts them down.

Also,if you are paying someone to give you "the look" your grandmother used to give you,you are paying someone to look down their nose at you.
Thats unacceptable.

GogoVicMorrow
reply to post by Advantage

 

Throw in the collection and ill make an offer.

Also.. I don't trust re agents or land appraisers. A friend had some land appraised and they guy said 54, 000 max and my friend set his own price and has people making serious offers at the 90, 000. Never trust someone that could be paid to do theur job poorly by someone else.

I dont trust them either, to tell you the truth! We had been mulling over FSBO since we have an atty friend for the paperwork. Problem is for a historic home that we have successfully blocked historic designation ( thread for another day) we DO need the exposure by specialty RE companies.

Or we can take a hit and get the hell out of the city on time.

DrumsRfun
reply to post by Advantage

 

Seeing other people's stuff is the nature of the beast in that business.
I understand trying to appeal to others but on the other side of it...I try to never worry about what people think.....people don't think often enough for me to take seriously.

Get a less pretentious real estate agent and give this one the boot or just tell her to be quiet and do her job and sell the house.
She is getting paid to sell the house...not run her mouth.

I deal with real estate agents fairly often and the amount of times i have said the words "eff off or eff you" is too many times to count but it shuts them down.

Also,if you are paying someone to give you "the look" your grandmother used to give you,you are paying someone to look down their nose at you.
Thats unacceptable.

I agree. I was making a funny rant, but it severely pissed me off. I had thought we NEEDED the specialty RE co.. but Im rethinking that position as we speak here.
Now I do agree with my more fringe stuff though. Id hate to freak a kid out or something. I started collecting carnival gaffs yrs ago and some are pretty gnarly! LOL!

reply to post by Advantage


When "she" comes back, make sure you have a display of body parts labeled, "Previous Real Estate Agents" in a curio cabinet and maybe she'll get the hint.

My sympathies for your beautiful collection.

beezzer
reply to post by Advantage

 

When "she" comes back, make sure you have a display of body parts labeled, "Previous Real Estate Agents" in a curio cabinet and maybe she'll get the hint.

My sympathies for your beautiful collection.

BWHAHA!!!

Oh man.. and it IS halloween!! You shouldnt give me ideas Beez... bad boy!

reply to post by Advantage


The realtor tried to do me the same way when I sold my last house, and I told him I wasn't changing crap and to just do his stinking job! My house sold in two weeks, and I didn't change a thing. Stupid realtor!

littled16
reply to post by Advantage

 

The realtor tried to do me the same way when I sold my last house, and I told him I wasn't changing crap and to just do his stinking job! My house sold in two weeks, and I didn't change a thing. Stupid realtor!

LOL! Good for you. I just got off the phone with the husband.. we're just going to redo the historic colors and say screw it.
It really pissed me off.. ugh. Im temperamental about my junk I guess.

clean up your house if you're gonna sell it, that's the number 1 rule. And put away most all of the stuff. All there should be is a few pictures a few pieces of furniture. Just enough for you to get by on. And very clean, and use some sented candles to make it smell good, and flowers. Put all your sheat in boxes and put it in the garage, shed or basement nicely put away.

People who are about to spend 100k or more, get in debt for possibly as long as 40years and Assume a huge interest cost above the normal price of the house they are buying tend to be picky...


Shame on the smart buyer who demands a certain quality for The huge debt they are about to take on, they should just shut up and bend over because you have a house to sell...

Anything to do with sales is about convincing the buyer, you have the product it's in your best interest to present it to the buyer as best you can.

spartacus699
clean up your house if you're gonna sell it, that's the number 1 rule. And put away most all of the stuff. All there should be is a few pictures a few pieces of furniture. Just enough for you to get by on. And very clean, and use some sented candles to make it smell good, and flowers. Put all your sheat in boxes and put it in the garage, shed or basement nicely put away.

ROFL!! Clean it? Its a never ending story.. cleaning 3K sq feet is a nightmare in a century old home because there are nooks and crannies EVERYWHERE. I have help cleaning.. specially since I wrecked this ACL.

Thats what she was getting at. Taking down and packing everything that makes this house MINE. Im not agreeing with this.. or at least the severity she is suggesting. Flowers? I have a florida room.. they want flowers they can walk in there.

After I get these floors redone next week Ill post some pics of the bareness that is my entry rooms. We have the original hemlock floors.. so they need extra care when refinishing them. Who ever heard of hemlock floors?!

ANd if the US implodes, at the very least I will have a newly painted and spruced up house to fight the zombies off of.

Too many people are just ridiculous! When I went to look at our house, the people had pathways out of boxes everywhere. You couldn't even see the couch!
I was more interested in the basics. How many bedrooms, decent size kitchen, and out in the country with land!

Heck, I would love to walk through your place, WITH all your cool stuff out!!!!

Wonder what people would think of mine? My whole house is pretty much witch themed, all year round!!

benrl
People who are about to spend 100k or more, get in debt for possibly as long as 40years and Assume a huge interest cost above the normal price of the house they are buying tend to be picky...


Shame on the smart buyer who demands a certain quality for The huge debt they are about to take on, they should just shut up and bend over because you have a house to sell...

Anything to do with sales is about convincing the buyer, you have the product it's in your best interest to present it to the buyer as best you can.

AHh yes, thats what I said.. shut up and bend over cause I have a house to sell. Thats why Im spending thousands to have the floors refinished this coming week and choosing 70 bucks a gallon historic paint for the potential buyer... to paint a total of 3K square feet of house. ... thats after updating 2 bathrooms and totally gutting the garage and redoing it. Yeah, bend over buyers... Im really screwing you cause I wanted my pics up and curios in a curio cabinet.

chiefsmom
Too many people are just ridiculous! When I went to look at our house, the people had pathways out of boxes everywhere. You couldn't even see the couch!
I was more interested in the basics. How many bedrooms, decent size kitchen, and out in the country with land!

Heck, I would love to walk through your place, WITH all your cool stuff out!!!!

Wonder what people would think of mine? My whole house is pretty much witch themed, all year round!!

Same when we bought this place. Good thing we bought it for its potential and not its state when we viewed it.
Well, normal people would see your witchy stuff and think WOW.. thats cool!! Then do what normal folks do and envision how they would set their own goodies in the house. I would anyway.

reply to post by Advantage


Lol. Sounds like you have a good realtor. Some of the replies here... The real estate agent and the seller have the same goal, to make money. Why would you not do simple things that make you money?
No one wants to see your house, they wanna see their house. Home purchase is one of the biggest financial decisions you can make. The Realtors job is to sell the house, which actually means help homebuyers overcome their objections to make a huge purchase. Maybe 1% of the time the home is exactly what the person wants in their head the other 99% the agent is needed to bring people out of their head an into reality. This is just sales 101.

SasquatchHunter
reply to post by Advantage

 

Lol. Sounds like you have a good realtor. Some of the replies here... The real estate agent and the seller have the same goal, to make money. Why would you not do simple things that make you money?
No one wants to see your house, they wanna see their house. Home purchase is one of the biggest financial decisions you can make. The Realtors job is to sell the house, which actually means help homebuyers overcome their objections to make a huge purchase. Maybe 1% of the time the home is exactly what the person wants in their head the other 99% the agent is needed to bring people out of their head an into reality. This is just sales 101.

ANd we are doing those things.
However, when I have professionally framed gravestone rubbings of certain authors and etc going down one hall on my 2nd floor.. and she says they need to go.. why?? I LIVE here. Im not listing it until this coming spring and they werent gaudy or horrible.. they cost more than the car she drives for Gods sake. THAT is what Im griping about.. what I said in my OP.

reply to post by Advantage


This could all be avoided if the real estate agent used a few simple words.

"Use your imagination"
"picture it empty to see the layout"

It sounds like she is compensating for a lack of skills.

I rent apartments and its almost always the first thing I say if someone lives there.
Other people's stuff is the nature of the beast.

DrumsRfun
reply to post by Advantage

 

This could all be avoided if the real estate agent used a few simple words.

"Use your imagination"
"picture it empty to see the layout"

It sounds like she is compensating for a lack of skills.

I rent apartments and its almost always the first thing I say if someone lives there.
Other people's stuff is the nature of the beast.

Thats what the husband and I think.. lack of skills. SHe gave certain suggestions that didnt make sense to us as far as something as simple as the color for the receiving room. We had to point out the age of the house and the correct time period colors.. AGAIN. Its like she wanted us to decorate according to HER tastes or something. Its a reputable RE co that specializes in historic homes and things of that nature, but dang.. maybe we got the dud realtor. LOL!!

reply to post by Advantage


Interesting. So you are heeding the advice of this devil and lambasting them as you do. You have every choice not to do what you are doing - you yourself have chosen this path. Why get so upset? Instead of getting angry at someone who makes suggestions (that is all they are) why not disagree and move on? Sell it yourself and see if your way is better than theirs. Pretty simple.

CJ