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I have a problem, a moral dilemma that is pinging my consciousness constantly.
A friend of mine, left for a week to see her mother on the East coast with her son. I shall call her Leah, it's not her real name. Leah's boyfriend, the father of her son, stayed back here in MI while she went to visit her mother.
While they were gone, my friend's boyfriend, was seen around town with a different girl. I did not see him with this other woman. I heard about it from a mutual friend of my husband's and Leah's boyfriend, who mentioned he'd showed up at his house with this new girl. When my husband's friend was over, the story he relayed, was alarming. They were touchy feeling and acting as though they were on a date. When he asked the boyfriend where was Leah, the boyfriend said, "She went to her mothers. I don't know if she is coming back, and we may have broke up."
When Leah get's home, she tells me how at her job (she works at a dept. store in the mall, her boyfriend also works as a manager of a different store in the mall) these women are treating her strangely. People she doesn't even know. She mentioned that they will go to her boyfriend and talk smack about her, to her boyfriend! She mentioned how she all found it very odd, as she wasn't having this problem before.
I asked her if her and her boyfriend broke up during the time she left on vacation to see her mother. She said, "No, of course not, I'd already had this trip planned for months. It had nothing to do with my boyfriend and he's known for weeks I'm going and had no problem with me going". She then asked me why I asked, and I bit my tongue.
I don't know anything other than hear-say. I don't know if her boyfriend was running around on her. All I know is what I heard from a mutual friend of my husbands, who knows her boyfriend.
Should I mention it to her or keep my big trap shut? There are too many scary diseases out in the world a promiscuous person can give their partner if they are not faithful. If I was being cheated on, I'd want somebody to let me know. The risk involved to one's health is great. But I don't know if he was actually cheating on her. All I know, is what I heard. That he was hanging around with a woman while his girl was off visiting her mom.
My husband say's I need to mind my own business because all I know - is nothing. Squat. It's not my business to cause problems in their relationship. They have a child together. I'm listening to him, and not saying anything. But I feel as though I'm betraying her by not mentioning it. Particularly when she tells me of these new problems she is having with strangers, women she's never met, immediately after returning home from vacation at her job.
What do you all think? Is my husband right? Mum's the word, or should I spill the beans?
Thanks to everyone for the replies and advice.
I've a lot to think about and meditate on with this issue. Everyone has good points from differing points of view and it helps me adjust my thinking and reaction to said matter.
I think, ultimately, opening my mouth will cause pain, division, and I just don't know if I can handle the situation correctly. Best to withdraw and let them be. Let it be.