Let's write an ATS joke before 5/3 goes live. Old school for the fun of it

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posted on Sep, 6 2013 @ 03:40 AM
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A conspiracy theorist, a religious fanatic, an alien, a politician, Sceptic Overlord, a brit, a yank, an aussie, several ATS subject matter experts and a dwarf walk into a bar ...........................



...... You'd think one of them would have seen it !!!





posted on Sep, 6 2013 @ 04:23 AM
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Okay, one more ATS joke:

Narrator: Phage walks into a bar.
Phage: Actually it was a pub.
Narrator: Phage walks into a pub, to get a drink.
Phage: No. I went in to use the phone.
Narrator: Phage walks into a pub to use the phone...to report a ufo.
Phage: That's ridiculous. It was a plane.
Narrator: Why would you need the phone if it was just a plane?
Phage: Because it was off course.
Narrator: How do you know it was off course?
Phage: I know everything.
Narrator: But this is supposed to be a joke.
Phage: It's not funny. Technically, a joke is meant to be amusing.
Narrator: Hey, this is MY joke.
Phage: What is your source?
Narrator: I'm just making it up.
Phage: Pics or it didn't happen.
Narrator: *sigh* A conspiracy theorist, a religious fanatic, an alien, a politician, Sceptic Overlord, a brit, a yank, an aussie, several ATS subject matter experts and a dwarf walk into a bar .......
Phage: It's still a pub.
Narrator: I give up.
Phage: Troll.

jacygirl
(P.S. No hard feelings Phage...it's a joke, lol)



posted on Sep, 6 2013 @ 04:32 AM
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You guys crack me up

Thanks ........I'll post one later when I have more time

Cody



posted on Sep, 6 2013 @ 05:46 AM
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An ATSer walked into a public library and circumspectly approached the desk. He lowered his voice. 'Have you any books on Conspiracy Theories?'

The librarian leaned forward and murmured into his ear: 'They're behind you'.

I'll let myself out

Cody



posted on Sep, 6 2013 @ 07:38 AM
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An alien walks into an English tea shop and asks for a chocolate cake and a cup of tea...

The lady behind the counter asks the alien if he wants a saucer...

"No thanks," says the alien, "I have one already parked in the car park."



posted on Sep, 6 2013 @ 08:23 AM
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reply to post by cody599
 


Bloke's driving through desert country ...
See's a strange outline ( tall outline against the flat horizon ), rising from the heat shimmer.

He slows for a better take on the situation and what he witnesses - takes him aback !!

It has human form; though - this ... has - 3 eyes, no arms and apparently was balancing on a single leg !!

He does the only thing an Aussie would do in such a situation, he says ....

Aye, aye, aye - you look armless!

Hop in and I'll give you a lift !!

edit on 6-9-2013 by Timely because: thinks he's Dave Allen !



posted on Sep, 6 2013 @ 08:56 AM
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Or; Vincent Van Gogh ...

" would you like a beer ? "

"No thanks" - " I got one 'ear'."

edit on 6-9-2013 by Timely because: gag reflex thing ... thing



posted on Sep, 6 2013 @ 09:50 AM
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Originally posted by Timely
Or; Vincent Van Gogh ...

" would you like a beer ? "

"No thanks" - " I got one 'ear'."

edit on 6-9-2013 by Timely because: gag reflex thing ... thing


Class..............Hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa



posted on Sep, 6 2013 @ 11:22 AM
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Nuff said

Cody



posted on Sep, 6 2013 @ 11:44 AM
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They all turn to the Dwarf and say

My God, Kim Jong-un you made it



posted on Sep, 6 2013 @ 02:34 PM
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Originally posted by Riouz
They all turn to the Dwarf and say

My God, Kim Jong-un you made it



My God, Kim Jong-un you made it ?



Cody



posted on Sep, 7 2013 @ 04:29 PM
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Off topic but I have to say this.... Cody change your avatar back my eyes are burning! NOOOOOOOOOOO!



posted on Sep, 8 2013 @ 11:55 PM
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reply to post by restlessinMT
 


Sorry it was for a bet

All sorted now

Cody



posted on Sep, 9 2013 @ 12:15 AM
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reply to post by cody599
 

Loser !













posted on Sep, 9 2013 @ 12:23 AM
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reply to post by Timely
 




Yeah I couldn't hold out for the full 24 hours ........................... Luckily

Cody



posted on Sep, 9 2013 @ 03:02 AM
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A conspiracy theorist, a religious fanatic, an alien, a politician, Sceptic Overlord, a brit, a yank, an aussie, several ATS subject matter experts and a dwarf walk into a bar

Skeptic asks the barkeep if he's seen his lost firehose . When the theorist shouts and waves hey Bill! the ATS members all think it should all go on the politician's tab. Skeptic raises his glass of tequila and says it's in proper forum to do so.
edit on 9-9-2013 by aboutface because: (no reason given)



posted on Sep, 9 2013 @ 05:40 AM
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reply to post by aboutface
 

"And another thing' the shortest one ranted, 'quit calling me a dwarf. I'm pretty close to a full 5/3.".





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