Complicated

I can see you,
Through the mask you wear,
Through its fabric,
My gaze does tear,
I have beheld,
All that you are,
Your closest secret,
Out flung thoughts so far,
And all the myriad,
In between,
Hid in your id,
To others unseen,
I know in my heart,
What I see is good,
Just as I know,
I love you more than I should.

reply to post by TrueBrit
Beautiful!

reply to post by littled16


Thanks littled16!

That's great. I like it a lot. That's the type i like

reply to post by TheDoctor46


Cheers Doc!

Me loves! Its so sweet and ominous at the same time

S&F

Tru, what brought this poem on? It seems like the creative aftermath of some life experience.

reply to post by XxNightAngelusxX


Thanks !

So, if I am honest, most of my inspiration to write this type of poem comes from my complicated and ambiguous relationship with a lady I know. Shes not a one man woman. Despite the fact that I am a monogamist, and the fact that she doesnt let me do the natural things you do for those you love (looking after them when they are sick, cooking them meals when they are hungry, getting the bill when out for dinner, buying thier drinks, and all the little things a fella can do for those he cares for), Im a little bit hopelessly attached. Its the honesty...

I have been in relationships before where everything appeared normal, but was deeply broken, which I only cottoned on to far too late to avoid serious grief. With this lady, I know precisely where I stand, which is in crap creek, with no paddle, and if I am honest, suffering with the absence of a canoe as well. Shes been honest from the begining, that she doesnt do commitment, relationships of any depth or exclusivity. Over the years that I have known this woman, we have spent a lot of enjoyable time together, but its obvious that her assertion about her desire NOT to have a serious relationship is accurate, or at least, it is as far as it can be applied to me and her.

So I am stuck now. I know that things with this woman are never going to move forward from this point, but I cannot just walk away. Whats worse is, that when I am interested in a woman, all other females in the land become nothing more than blokes with unusual chests and no man sausage, in my eyes. I am therefore double boned, because I know its never going to go anywhere between me and her, but at the same time, I am blind to other possibilities, probably because I have no desire to see any.

The poem is basically recognition that the lady is great, but that I shouldnt feel about her the way I do, because I understand, intellectually that feeling this way makes it impossible for me to find a true companion for life.

reply to post by TrueBrit


That was truly a beautiful poem indeed. I read about the relationship you're in. I just want to wish you the best of luck my friend.

reply to post by TrueBrit


Hmmm... first of all; CALLED IT!

Sorry, forceful habit. Secondly, I think I have a song that can pretty well sum up your relationship with this woman. A song near and dear to me.



Aaaaaand third, I think you might need to seriously ponder on this whole thing. Like... can you ever see her committing in the future? If it really IS impossible, then it seems like a "hang up and try another line" situation.

Crummy thing is, with situations like that, the cleanest option would be to sever ties with this person completely... unless you have the astounding ability to remain close friends with someone, while mentally annihilating any romantic feelings you have for them, forcing yourself to accept that it will *never happen.*

Sorry if I seem like I'm playing therapist here... but I've been in this situation before.

Godspeed, friend

reply to post by XxNightAngelusxX


I appreciate the thoughtfulness of your reply!

While I realise that on the face of it, walking away would seem the sensible option, one thing you cannot be aware of, is the state I was in before I met this woman.

Due to an appalling break up, I had spent about two years in a state of emotional collapse. Friends had noticed, and commented upon the fact that it seemed as if I had shut down in certain respects, become colder and less compassionate. I quite literally found myself loosing all ability to empathise with anyone outside of what I like to call, my little family of friends.

Upon meeting this woman, and getting to know her, my friends immediately noted that I seemed more like my old self, cracking jokes, handing out hugs with only the merest of provocation, singing, bouncing around like a mad bugger. In short, I got my soul back, and this woman was instrumental in that. I suppose you could say that for the moment, I am content to have feelings for her, because that is preferable to feeling nothing at all.

Perhaps that isnt the healthiest thing in the world, but unfortunately, this is the healthiest I have ever been in terms of my mental state, so I am loathe to rock this particular waterborne conveyance just at this moment

Originally posted by TrueBrit
reply to post by XxNightAngelusxX

 

I appreciate the thoughtfulness of your reply!

While I realise that on the face of it, walking away would seem the sensible option, one thing you cannot be aware of, is the state I was in before I met this woman.

Due to an appalling break up, I had spent about two years in a state of emotional collapse. Friends had noticed, and commented upon the fact that it seemed as if I had shut down in certain respects, become colder and less compassionate. I quite literally found myself loosing all ability to empathise with anyone outside of what I like to call, my little family of friends.

Upon meeting this woman, and getting to know her, my friends immediately noted that I seemed more like my old self, cracking jokes, handing out hugs with only the merest of provocation, singing, bouncing around like a mad bugger. In short, I got my soul back, and this woman was instrumental in that. I suppose you could say that for the moment, I am content to have feelings for her, because that is preferable to feeling nothing at all.

Perhaps that isnt the healthiest thing in the world, but unfortunately, this is the healthiest I have ever been in terms of my mental state, so I am loathe to rock this particular waterborne conveyance just at this moment

You couldn't have picked a better title for this poem...

Your relationship with her monumentally helps you, AND holds you back. That really IS complicated, and even more complicated of an issue to try to resolve somehow.

Your friends are here for you all the way, Tru. Godspeed!

Originally posted by XxNightAngelusxX

You couldn't have picked a better title for this poem...

Dont I know it !

Your relationship with her monumentally helps you, AND holds you back. That really IS complicated, and even more complicated of an issue to try to resolve somehow.

Your friends are here for you all the way, Tru. Godspeed!

It IS complicated, but its good to know that folk have my back! Between my local buddies, and caring individuals around here, I feel pretty damned supported, and that feels good. Cheers !

reply to post by natalia


Thanks for reading, and for your supportive comment natalia