Why is it the older you get the more you seem to lose your innocence - is that normal???

It's funny because I grew up in the 80's (i'm 38 now) so back then we weren't exposed to so much information. As kids were infact naive and innocent in a lot of ways. Then the 90's you're getting old, start experimenting a bit more and getting exposed to more. Then in 2000's even more, and with the dawn of the web you're pretty much exposed to everything and anything.

Then for example in 2010 I started smoking pot (not often I might add, and partly because I reasoned that I don't think it's as harmful as drinking, and I drink so why not smoke weed) but that's something as a kid I thought was "extremely taboo". And when I look back I just find that just the shier volume of negativity and corruption haunting you at every twist and turn of life is almost overwhelming. I know I still have a conscience but I know it's not as strong as it once was. It's crazy. I tend to reason...."well that's what happens to all adults", and in a lot of ways that's true but it doesn't mean it's normal.

Like I remember when I was a kid, certain situations would come up and I'd have a very strong emotional response to things and situations that I thought were "bad". In essence my conscience would kick in. Today, that doesn't really happen hardly at all for me. I don't know if that's normal or not. But I find that I'm almost tolerant of almost anything. Like much of it I wouldn't do myself but I don't get a bad feeling about it anymore. I think that's cuz my conscience has been damaged to some degree. I know it's still there but it doesn't seem as active as it once was.

I was just wondering how you feel your conscience is now a days compared to when you were younger? Does anything I'm talking about ring home? and what are your thoughts on the whole concept.

The older we get, are we losing our very souls???

It's not so much a loss of conscience as it is a loss of consciousness.

In this world we drift through our days almost completely reliant on technology. To get to work, to be entertained, to eat, to sleep even sometimes. We are in the beginning stages of becoming androids. This is truth.

With that truth also comes side effect, the WORST one being the fact that our souls as humans have withered to a fraction of what they once were. We no longer feel those emotional responses because the comprehension of thw weight of the situation has diminished because we are so preoccupied that even if a child was murdered right in front of our eyes SOME of us would forget about the emotional impact within hours.

It's not because we are getting old
it's not because we have no conscience
it's because we are losing out souls. Our humanistic nature.



BTW I'm only 23 and I feel the impact of this. That's how I know the age is not the problem.

reply to post by spartacus699

I was just wondering how you feel your conscience is now a days compared to when you were younger?

My conscience is actually more acutely aware of how my actions may harm someone and of what I have done in the past to cause harm.

When I was younger, not so. All good for a day and then move on because others didn't matter so much. Not completely but you get the message.

So being older finds me more aware of my actions and I find myself stopping to think of how I would feel in another man's shoes.

Hope that answers it.

Peace

The reason our innocence gets lost as we grow older is because we are exposed to much more over the years. I'm only 21 now but as a younger child I really did not care about the outside world like most children don't. The only things I cared about was N64 computer games and cartoons. As we get older we are exposed to the real horrors and disasters of the world, even more so now with 24/7 news cycle. The important thing is not to worry about outside events in which you have no control over but to worry about what you do have control over such family and friends. Do what makes you happy and try to block out the tragedies that effect your conscious.

Desensitized.

When we are young parents did their best to shield us from the evils of the world. But once you hit the age where you can read and understand what they are talking about on the news there is no return to innocence. Even more today than it ever was when I grew up in the sixties. The world was a beautiful place back then, one that I am afraid we will never see again. The earliest back I can remember of a story that touched me was the Kennedy assassination. I was 5. Back then we lived beside a graveyard and it never once occurred to me that there were bodies 6 feet under the ground. My sisters and I and friends would play in the graveyard and not be creeped out or anything.

Life is too graphic today, nothing seems to be censored for young minds or even adults who would rather not see the image and today you wouldn't catch me living beside a graveyard. Too many scary movies and zombies out there.

I remember being more naive as a kid. As for innocent, well, when your biggest contact with corruption is limited to an evil vizier with a snarky parrot on his shoulder, what's your mind going to work with?
I tell you though, kids can be some of the most dangerous and scary creatures on the planet. The gradual loss of innocence comes with wisdom and basic morals, if they're receptive and their caregivers are lucky enough.

Originally posted by Ear-Responsible
Desensitized.

That is exactly what is happening to many people. Never ever let life do that to you. Always keep your compassion for others and the world around you. The world can be a very chaotic,cold, confusing and sometimes cruel place. There will always be good people and beauty in the world. Treasure those things that make your heart sing. Never stop caring. Find a balance. Live your life with love and kindness, compassion and light. Be the best that you can be. Breathe deeply and cleanse the negativity away as best you can. Be an example of what you would like to see in the world.

Originally posted by Night Star

Originally posted by Ear-Responsible
Desensitized.

That is exactly what is happening to many people. Never ever let life do that to you. Always keep your compassion for others and the world around you. The world can be a very chaotic,cold, confusing and sometimes cruel place. There will always be good people and beauty in the world. Treasure those things that make your heart sing. Never stop caring. Find a balance. Live your life with love and kindness, compassion and light. Be the best that you can be. Breathe deeply and cleanse the negativity away as best you can. Be an example of what you would like to see in the world.

This is the best thing for us as humans's to maintain or souls. But one important thing that we must remember to do, is turn to God! Talk to him about whatever is burdening you.

That one post got me thinking. I guess in some ways as a kid I did a lot of bad things. But I don't think it was all unintentional. I was so naive back then. But I felt a lot more emotion about a lot of things. Like I use to cry more. I don't do that hardly at all anymore. Like maybe once ever year or two. I just don't get that emotional and don't take things to heart as easy. It takes an awful lot to overwhelm me to the point where I sort of break down. I guess that's relatively normal in some ways. Ya now a days the good word for it is "desensitized". That's odd. But then again like the one person said, "ya I too am getting it back as well". Like I'm recognizing a lot of the wrong I have done and that life should be about loving and helping your fellow man. So whenever I can I try and help people. It's not as much about me anymore, as it is about giving back to others in life. That's what life is becoming more and more about for me. But I don't know.

Around the age of 9, children start to have an understanding of death, and that they too will die one day.

Around the age of 13 children enter puberty. Which opens them up to sexual emotions, etc.

That isn't the full list of reasons... But just the general point.. The older you get the more you begin to understand.

reply to post by spartacus699


It's not a matter of losing innocence.

As you age and become more aware, you learn that you can't trust anyone.
You recognize the lies and deception coming from those that claim to love you.

And you see the same thing in your own heart and soul, but the psychological defense mechanisms kick in and you rationalize your manipulation of people that you claim to love.

To late you realize you are "lost"

It can go both ways though. I was more innocent at 5 than I was at 15 that is for sure. But now I am in my 30's and I don't know if I would call it innocence, but I am 100000% more of a moral person, of a caring person.

Thank you so much for posting this, I have been feeling this greatly in the past few years. I myself am in my 30's, and I remember myself being a "goody two shoe" and when I look at a lot of the thing I do today, I know my old self from a decade or two ago would have thought I was the devil.

So where am I at? Part of it was that I was "raised Christian" What I mean by that is I came to know the Lord at 15, and was a "good kid" since then till about my 20's. I would do the typical stuff that guys do, I would sleep around, curse, drink, that kind of stuff. By today's standards its glorified and not really something that is "bad". I felt like most of my guilt stemmed from my Christian upbringing, being told to wait till marriage for sex, to not over drink, and to not be these certain things. I feel like I was a better person when I was in my mid teens, a much purer person.

I look at myself now, and I still hold onto my faith in the Lord just as much as I did the first day, except it is different. I feel like I used to love the Lord in terms of a never ending infatuation, and in later years I still love Him, but it is in a different way. I love Him the same way a married man loves his wife over many years like the passion isn't there but the love is [and no I am not saying this is how married men are, or how my marriage is, but you get my point.] Honestly I feel like most of the reason for this is not natural, but because I have spent so many years both in these forums and out in the "real world" trying to prove God to people. Fighting the good fight and seeing that its just not working.

What I mean by this is I can't tell someone my testimony or how God saved me on a personal level and have that mean anything anymore. People want scientific and logical proof, nobody wants to hear my story. Its frustrating because I find myself tackling these logical and truly unanswerable questions for people who have no idea what "faith" actually is, they just want proof. Over the years I find myself being able to contend with a great deal of these so called "scientifically minded logical non believers" and yet not getting anywhere with them, only being met with criticism and being called an idiot and so on. If you cant tell by my avatar and all of that, I put up a fight, I enjoy it, but at what cost? I find myself looking back at my old self and thinking I was a fool, or even looking at other Christians and thinking they are fools, but why? Because my love for God, my love for people, my attempts to "prove" God to others has diminished to some kind of math paper, where there is no answer.

So I find that the atheists and non believers, and the people looking for proof of God, are still solid and set in their own opinions, and were not really getting anywhere, and all I am doing is trying to prove something I know to be real, and almost losing my faith because I lose sense of what I fell in love with. Take for example your an athlete, playing your favorite sport, and your good at it, but you spend all of your time convincing people to play your sport, and they never will, and in the mean time you have only gotten fat and out of shape. That's how I feel about my relationship with God, like I am beating my head against a brick wall, and the only one that's cracking is my head. This doesn't mean I wont continue answering tough questions the way I do, or continue on like I am, its just I am pointing out how I feel.

When I was younger I wanted to prove how smart I was, or strong, or creative, you name it. Now I look at myself, and wish I had the attributes of love, selfishness, compassion, and so on. I would trade in every ounce of whatever intellect, strength, or creativity I think I have, to have the slightest amount of love and selflessness for others. I feel guilt about this all the time. I feel guilt that I feel very little for others, and that of all things Jesus said was most important "love", I lack the most. I blame society, but mostly I blame myself. I feel my life is like that of a robots, existing, but not living.

I fantasize about a life where I have a meaningful life, and no I don't mean a life full of money and wealth and success, but one where I have these true virtues like love and compassion, and am true about it. I am not saying I hate my life, or am ungrateful. But that I realize my shortcomings, and realize how far I am from what I thought I was closest too. Here is something I have known for a while; "The older I get, the more I realize I don't deserve Jesus." Maybe you are reading this expecting some kind of deep psychological analysis of our society or some research or something, but its not there, your only are reading one man's feelings and opinion of himself in this modern world.

Continued Below..

Continued from above..

This weekend I was out in the woods, camping with my wife, and it was a great time, but I felt an uneasiness unlike before. I felt like I was out of touch with everything around me, and out of touch with myself in many ways. When I was in my teenage years and early twenties, I would spend a lot of time meditating and praying in the woods, feeling close to the Lord, feeling like I was bonding with Him around His creation, it was great. Over the years I would try to attempt this again, but it would fail. Then ultimately, this weekend, I felt so guilt, so ashamed, like something in me was lost. If you were to ask me "are you still a Christian, are your still going to heaven?" I would say yes, of course to both. Do I still love the Lord and stand up for Him? Absolutely, so whats wrong?

I feel like my life has become a never ending continuation of not caring, like I read the news, I hear the horrible things, call it insensitivity, but I become like I don't care, like I care in terms of intellect, in saying "that is a bad thing, I wish it didn't happen." But in my heart I don't really care. That's what I hate the most about myself. Is that nothing separates me from someone with no morals. I am a Christian, I am supposed to have the heart of God, yet someone with no religion is no different than me. (No I am not saying you cant be a good person without a belief in God, I am referring more towards the person who lives life like there is no consequence) So why do I lack these morals and all of that? It is the worse feeling to drive by a poor man, and not care, and worse, even feel the right to criticize him.. That could be Jesus there..

So as I write this here is what comes to mind; As I get older, I find myself desensitized, and I find myself having to try hard, to work towards caring, or I can do what feels natural, and put myself above them and their situation. I feel like I want to embrace philosophies that make it easy to accept why other people have horrible lives and circumstances, I feel like I want to say "they deserve it." or "they aren't as good as me." Something I would never have even considered in my early years. Or even day to day interactions, I get impatient with the cook preparing my meal at some restaurant, or I want to lash out at someone who messed up in the slightest, as though I am so entitled and deserving of other peoples service. I feel like I want to embrace the common held notion that if I have the money to be this way, then be it, that whoever serves me, is below me.

Yet at the same time I struggle within. People talk all around me about their next business investment, or their future plans, or talk about this life like this life is forever, like money and riches are forever. And I sit here thinking who cares? I mean yes money is nice, and its good to have ambition, but I feel like I am content with my life, like I don't want or need anything more than what I already have, and I live paycheck to paycheck. So its funny on one hand I am so for the way this life is, then on the other, I cant even take "real life" stuff seriously, because I see how everything is so passing and fleeting, and for nothingness, I often wonder if I were about to die would I even care? So deep within me you find the birth of a man who becomes like anybody else in the world, and the dying of a man who is good, and somewhere in between is me, the man typing this.

Maybe "being good" comes natural at a younger age, and "being bad" comes natural at an older age. The world becomes scary as you get older, you either have to amplify this fear by realizing your shortcomings, that your not as strong, smart, or original as you thought, or you can counter these fears by "proving" you are stronger, smarter, and more creative by crushing other people through monetary means, and this is glorified. You have brought up a great topic OP, I appreciate you being brave enough to admit this. To anybody who reads this, pray for me, and for others.

I leave you with one last thought; "As a young man, I thought how can I need Jesus when I have few sins to be forgiven? Yet now, I realize how can I not need Jesus, when I have many sins to be forgiven?" I can attest with all of my life and being, that the older I get, the more I realize I am in need of a Savior, that all of my shortcomings cannot be forgiven by any means of my own doing, and that the more I realize the evil I truly am deep within, that I am forgiven of this, allows me to see Gods love deeper. "The greater the sinner, the greater the man who knows God's love."

I think it's because the older we get the more we forget who we really are.

reply to post by spartacus699

Hi again tonite Sparticus...The Easter Bunny, Santa, the Tooth Fairy....all pretty cool until one day....yep. Reality sets in for us all in time...then nothing seems the same anymore because well...it isn't.

And youll see it more and more around you as you get older.....that's life.

Some lyrics to demonstrate:"

Remember when the days were long
And rolled beneath a deep blue sky
Didn't have a care in the world
With mommy and daddy standin' by
But "happily ever after" fails
And we've been poisoned by these fairy tales"
(End of the Innocence-Bruce Hornsby-Don Henley)

"And every day I'm more confused as the saints turn into sinners
All the heroes and legends I knew as a child have fallen to idols of clay...
...I close my eyes and know there's peace in a world so filled with hatred
Then I wake up each morning and turn on the news to find we've so far to go
And I keep on hoping for a sign, so afraid that I just won't know"
(Show me the Way-Dennis DeYoung-STYX)

This just shows you...as we age...its the end of our innocence...when reality hits us...

reply to post by spartacus699

I was just wondering how you feel your conscience is now a days compared to when you were younger? Does anything I'm talking about ring home? and what are your thoughts on the whole concept. The older we get, are we losing our very souls???

Not losing our souls, but rather the older we get the more we understand what humans are capable of. Now at the age of 58 I really don't need to check the news to know what's going to happen on a fairly regular basis. War. Crime. Cruelty. Corruption. Lies. Business greed...

The only thing that changes over time is the names of those involved. It's like a bad movie that I've seen 20 times, and it gets tiring.

Someone who stays with us told my kids that he had nearly beat a game, and the outcome seemed to be this: if you were a hero and good you died early, sacrificed yourself early in the game, and if you survived long time, you were now evil, having not spoken up and taken any risks and tried to change things, like a hero does. So if you want to be safe, you are evil. Seemed to be the whole hidden theme of the game.

Well the universe is sick of martyrs, and we're supposed to withdraw from their game, and their concepts of rules, that they make up, and try to get believers for, and their versions of universes that they try to recruit believers for, and look after your families and keep them safe and shine some love and understanding. Anything else is becoming something you shouldn't become or giving into the evil plans of evil doers.

One word to a sum it up for you. Conditioning.... Now how does conditioning apply to your question. Its a boy (or girl), you know nothing of this world. Times passes ~~ you learn from your parents, family , friends. If you came of age in a honest loving environment, you learn honesty and hard work (Naturally vice versa). So, as you grow older, you encounter (perceived) good and bad things in life. Now nothing in life is free. Like an above poster mentioned about the video game. In this world the good die young and the bad live on. Meaning if you want to keep living, you must condition yourself. You must partake in some form of destructive behavior (Remember nothing in life is free). So the price of destructive behavior is going to cost you apart of your conscience, soul or humanity. Finally you are conditioned and your innocent is depleting or depleted. The ans to your question is YES.
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