Never underestimate a woman's desire to be mistreated.

reply to post by votan


Thank you for only reading the first post, now, if you'd kindly read the rest of at least the first page, you'd realize that I had retracted some of the harshness of the first statement.

reply to post by dave_welch
Okay dave, this is completely off topic but here I go:

What have you done with Han Solo? If you ransomed him to Jabba we may have a problem!

reply to post by littled16


Oh, he's fine, just had to make the Kessel Run, So his brother in Smuggling "Bandit" Darville is taking his place for a bit.

Originally posted by dave_welch
Update:

Just got a message from her. Here's what it said: "I am sorry about everything. I have alot of stuff to figure out. I will talk to u about it as soon as i can"

Any Ideas what that means?

YA it means your on the back burner just in case whatever her prime directives does not work out, you know plan A is not working so on to plan B. Its something females say to keep there options open. But hey a girls likely to have bills and much more, but so does everybody else. So ya! such is all relationships in one way or another. The whole of it is merely decorations and fancy words on very primal needs and urges. Of which the outcome is long decided, people just seem to go through the motions.

I however think you should erase her phone number, but I know you wont. Listen dude, just admit it your a gluten for this kind of punishment, in fact for some its practically part of the ritual. And so is she, from what you said before in your other posts you two already sort of got down in a way, if not jiggy...quite yet. Really its like I said, its all about wavelengths and cosmic fate and all that jive. You my friend have no problems, and neither does she in fact I would say it sounds like your made for each other. But that to does not mean much, as love is but a word, and in time all of that and everything will come to a head, and the first ant hill in your way may trip you both. All of this so far that you and her have been going through back and forth has just been the preliminaries to something that possibly just may be written in stone....Ain't love grand.

So you want to be with her for your own convoluted reasons, and they just may be the right reasons. And her? Well as you know by now females have there ways, to which there reasons will eventually play catch up. Play her game and you will reach her ends, dont play her game and the likely outcome is still the same. But from all you said, nothing about her makes her out to be any sort of damsel in distress, in fact you even said she is the one keeping on to the other guy even paying for him and all that, and not the other way around. In either case its merely the same thing. Like I said its practically fate, the roles could reverse or things could change but the results and the fact that they are still attract each other will still be there.

And from all you said, only a few options seem possible from there, she is either moving on or she is staying and you are likely merely a option she is considering, usually before females get cozy with a new host they play these sort of games, you know to test the watters, however you may not be the only one. But you and the guy have much in common once this whole thing wears out, and once both your games are done. Then the real thing will begin, and you both will come to realize that it was merely a game of circumstance were it would of reached this outcome no matter who was in the forefront first, hopefully by then you both will be to tired and old to be steeping voluntarily into such things. I do believe its called contentment.

So ya! In that case. I think you two should settle this like men, you know give her what she is looking for. I say you should have a bare knuckle fight for her with the guy. Winner gets her, and loser. Well the loser is probably the real winner because the whole thing just sounds like a headache. But in any case bro. You came to the right place for advice.

Here is what you should do. Get yourself a nice and new hat. And make yourself dispensable on the places they hang out. You know one of these days, act all inconspicuous and bump into this guy while he is with her. When he bumps into you, oh so lazily drop your hat at his feet. Make sure he touches it with his feet or steps on it. When he does, say something along the lines of..."Hey buddy why don't you watch were I am going" Now in the time he is confused, pick up your hat and pretend like its just totaled. Get in his face, and say. So are you going to say sorry? And if he does, put your hat in his face and say. Its not me you got to say sorry to, say sorry to my hat, I think you hurt her feelings.

By now he will no doubt be totally confused and think your a crazy man, and no doubt this chick your going on about will be intrigued, and think your awesome have some major balls and confidence and all that crap. At which point if he actually decides to fight you. Then kick his ass...But if he does not want to fight you. Then challenge him to a game of paper rock scissors for her. Oh ya! She will totally be impressed then. All's I can say is. May the best man win.

Or you can avoid all that work dude. Like I said bro, I do believe both your fates are written in the stars and from the little you said on this whole thing it sounds like your made for each-other, its all just a matter of the peculiar paths you will take to end up at the same place.

reply to post by galadofwarthethird


Wow, that tangent you went of on there made me laugh pretty hard, thanks for that. However the rest, may be good advice, I'm having trouble figuring out if your were only joking in the obvious parts or not...

Sounds like you might be in the unfortunate position as being perceived as the beta male with this woman, meaning you are a non-sexual entity to this woman. Women generally will be attracted to an alpha male, one who makes them feel safe, secure, emotional and sexual, and that is likely why she goes back to him.

You may hate me for this.. so be it. Just putting it out there.

Most, but not all women mainly make choices based on emotion, whether these are good or bad emotions doesn't seem to matter. They choose the option that will make them feel the most emotions, and they will rationalise that choice afterwards.

Women hate nice guys.. They will tell you their ideal man is a nice guy, and they believe this, but in reality they want an alpha male.. which isn't bad.. its only logical, but there aren't that many around. And unstable men often seem alpha.. but are actually just too full of themselves. So these are the kind of men women gravitate to.

Luckily most of them realise this when they get older.. and settle for a nice guy.
If they didn't, the world would probably be full of sociopaths.

Originally posted by Skaffa
You may hate me for this.. so be it. Just putting it out there.

Most, but not all women mainly make choices based on emotion, whether these are good or bad emotions doesn't seem to matter. They choose the option that will make them feel the most emotions, and they will rationalise that choice afterwards.

Women hate nice guys.. They will tell you their ideal man is a nice guy, and they believe this, but in reality they want an alpha male.. which isn't bad.. its only logical, but there aren't that many around. And unstable men often seem alpha.. but are actually just too full of themselves. So these are the kind of men women gravitate to.

Luckily most of them realise this when they get older.. and settle for a nice guy.
If they didn't, the world would probably be full of sociopaths.

Why would I hate you for that, it's true.

However, I would consider myself Alfa, at least where it matter. I'm nice, but I don't let people walk all over me, and I'll be the first one to fight when it's necessary. Most people don't mess with me, because they know that I can probably beat them severely, I just don't do it. I don't like to fight because I usually end up hurting someone seriously, and there's no reason for that most of the time.

So, someone explain to me, just what is an Alpha Male?

Update:

Looks like most of you were right. She's deleted her facebook and that was the only I had to get a hold of her.

I should have known that things can't work out to my advantage.

Guess I'd better get ready to hear "I told you so."

all woman suffer from similar problems , not saying men dont either

Originally posted by dave_welch
Why is it that you will constantly use your friends, and then just go back to the deadbeat

For the entertaining conjugal relationship.

It's a well known fact that deadbeats are good at conjugal relationships.

reply to post by dave_welch
No "I told you so" dave. That's just the breaks sometimes. Take a few days to mourn the loss of a friendship and then move on. The right woman is waiting for you out there, and when you find her it will be awesome!

reply to post by dave_welch


Ahhh Dave, I am so sorry to hear this. No, there are no, "I told you so's". Now is the time for you to be gentle to yourself, treat yourself well and know that you are a good person that deserves better. I'm just going to say this and it won't help but it will let you know you aren't alone, my cousin (male) went through the same scenario. Three different times. He hung onto the idea that he could save this woman in the exact circumstances you find yourself in and this went on for 3 years. When she finally told him straight out that she was not interested in pursuing a life with him he was devastated. Then, unfortunately, he went onto two new fresh identical women that needed saving. He's still in the thick of things.

I know there is someone completely meant for you. This won't any impact at this time but I am going to say it for when you are in the healing phase: you are meant to be loved by someone who sees what you have to offer and who will love you for you. She is out there and she is going to enter your life when the time is just right.

Do take care. A broken heart is such a heavy devastating time but you will make it through this. She may be confused and I know how much you want her but it's unfair for her to offer herself like that and then just leave you in her dust. Not putting her down, it's just so sad that you now have to deal with all the emotions that have built up within you.

Wishing you all the best. Hugs bro!

Originally posted by dave_welch
Update:

Looks like most of you were right. She's deleted her facebook and that was the only I had to get a hold of her.

I should have known that things can't work out to my advantage.

Guess I'd better get ready to hear "I told you so."

edit on 8-7-2013 by dave_welch because: (no reason given)

I'll spare you those words and just say we all live and learn. Life gives us many lessons, many of them quite harsh, learn from them and trudge onward... first into the next disaster haha I'm just a bit cynical about life

Click here for more information.

Originally posted by Deetermined
reply to post by dave_welch

 

I don't think I'll be able to figure out the right course of action until I can talk to her, the only problem with that is catching her at home when he's not around.

You act like she doesn't have a way to get ahold of you or leave her home.

If you haven't heard from her, there's a reason.

he said .....HER PHONE IS BROKEN, so the only way to get a hold of her is to go over there, but she is back with the guy and he wants to avoid him...never mind! he must have been posting when I was posting the above message.....moot point after what he posted!

Originally posted by benrl
Loads of generalizations there...

... that just happen to be entirely true the greater vast majority of the time.

I here you. There are some Irish women like that and they say "look our jimmy loves me because he hits me."
How about the 200 letters from women that wanted to marry Ted Bundy. There are some women who just defy logic so those are the one you avoid. I was bitten once by one crazy one so after that I was able the sus them out pretty easy after that by how they looked or by what they say in response to what I have said. The crazy ones got mad at me were the good ones joked with me.