reply to post by spartacus699
I never attained the heady height of total financial independence, so I do not know what it is like to loose it. I have lived most of my life unable
to make any savings, and wondering wether I get to eat next month. I lived for a while, on the streets also, and that was when I was employed! I sofa
surfed for a while too.
All I can say, having been to the bottom end, is that when I was at literally rock bottom, it gave me strength, confidence, power over myself. I
mastered myself as a man, in a way that I never thought would be necessary or even possible before. For me, living on the edge of oblivion is
something I am comfortable with now, so if it ever becomes necessary again, I know I will handle it, because once you have been there, there is
nothing to fear from it.
However, these things strike us all differently. Motivation for me was simple. Live day by day, and do what you can to ensure that you put enough
nutrients in your body to keep that vital resource in the best possible condition. Another thing I had to do was to slow myself right down. Sometimes,
when you are hungry, havent been sleeping right (for lots of reasons, including but in no way limited to the quality of your sleeping area), and have
no security, it can make your mind race. You can sometimes feel like you arent doing enough to change things. What you have to realise is that
sometimes, things are just messed up, and the only thing you can do is ride the wave.
Oh sure, walk around town all damned day, every damned day, delivering your curriculum vitae (or resume, for those who dont accept that you ought to
speak a language the way its originators do, just to simplify matters (kidding, so shh)), bust your butt trying to find work in every place you can
think of. Thats just what you do. But remember also that looking for work is actually more draining, more tiring, both mentally and physically, than
actually doing most jobs that are available these days. The uncertainty of a positive result makes the psychological drain the most damaging, so you
have to make sure that you take a day to just collapse and slow yourself down. I was walking about 20 kilometres per day when I was handing my CV out
to prospective employers, just to give you some perspective, a comparison with a normal days work.
For me, I found that meditation, sitting on the beach as the sun came up, or went down, watching storm clouds roll across the sea, just letting go
and absorbing a natural sensation, reminding myself that I was connected to the universe in some way, were all very helpful. Peace can be a cooling
balm in the heat of such times. You also need to stay connected with people who care about you.
Most important of all though, is you may need to consider modifying your expectations somewhat. I am not talking about taking a really piss poor job,
just because it is there (although if that is what you want to do, then you ought to go ahead). What I mean is, you cannot set yourself targets, like
"I expect to be employed by X and then when I have been there for Y months I will have saved enough to rent a dwelling....".
Right now, if I were you, I would be expecting nothing what so ever, and being OK with that. If you rage against the situation (which remember, you
cannot do anything about) you will end up ulcerating your own stomach and causing yourself all manner of horrid internal problems, not least
psychological issues long term. You need to remember that at the thin end of the wedge, it is all about being able to roll with the punches, ride the
wave, be prepared to be nothing but dust in the wind for a while. I guess boiled down, you have no power to change your position, and you have to
learn not to mind that. The consequences of having a problem with that state of affairs are unplesant, and do not solve the issue.