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Is it possible to simply dislike homosexual behavior without being labeled a homophobe?

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posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 09:26 AM
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Honestly, it's one thing to dislike homosexual behavior, but it's a completely different thing to speak out against it as if you are morally superior. These are the people that are homophobes. Being a straight male, seeing homosexual behavior obviously isn't my cup of tea because I don't share that same attraction, but I would never actively speak out against them or vote to oppress marriage rights for them. All humans are equal and should be treated as such. So yeah, if you speak out against homosexuals, you are a homophobe, and there's really no way around that. If not, then what exactly is your motivation? People hide behind religion, tradition and old 'definitions' of marriage to justify their view, but in reality it's just because they feel it's "icky" and can't relate. Whatever happened to live and let live? If somebody got up on a podium and started speaking out against black people, hispanic people or jewish people and promoting unequal rights with others, they would be labeled a racist or bigot. The same should hold true for homosexuality. If you don't approve of homosexuality or their marriage, then don't pay attention to it, it really is that simple. It doesn't affect your life, so why the need for hate speech? You don't see homosexuals walking inside your church building, interrupting the service and talking about how the church was spread by the sword, oppression and hatred/torture of non believers. So show them the same respect and keep your self righteous religious views out of politics and law.
edit on 1-7-2013 by Barcs because: (no reason given)




posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 09:44 AM
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I can completely understand the OP's feelings about this. I don't like rude people and to me that behavior is meant to stir up a reaction. Am I a Xenophobe because I don't like sitting in a doctors office or going about my daily activities to hear people talking in another language very loudly as if they do it on purpose to annoy everyone around them? What is really funny is a LOT of American's do speak Spanish and we know when you are talking about us, so don't be surprised when you get that feeling of not being welcome.

I have been in a same sex relationship for 13 years. I have never enjoyed being around pushy gays. However, I want to also point out that it is these pushy gays who have made it possible to even go out with my partner in public compared to what it was like in the 1980's for gays.

The pushy gays really are not a large part of the demographic, but it is their audacity to be in your face that has pushed more out of the closet without being fired, beaten or killed. So, while they make me uncomfortable, I also say, "Thank you".



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 10:08 AM
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Originally posted by Paschar0
Funny story, while out with friends, a group of men were on line for the theater just in front of us. Some of them were very flamboyant. What's flamboyant? Loud, sexually suggestive remarks every two seconds, feminine clothing, mannerisms (swishing in and out of line) even smells, I could go on, but there was just no mistake, they were advertising and putting on a show and being especially vocal about how if people didn't like it, they're just repressed.

I made a remark to my friends that I didn't like those kind of people. I was immediately accused of being a homophobe. This despite never having talked about the subject to them in our entire time knowing each other. The funny part was that while we were discussing it, the guys we were talking about picked up on it and confronted us, I unashamedly explained why I didn't like it, and to my surprise, one of their group said he didn't like it either and actually defended me, while others from both groups started in on the why I'm such a bad man.

By the time we were allowed in, we were all getting along and talking with each other just fine. Why? because I explained that ANY man acting that way would be annoying to me, whether they were gay or not. Same holds true for other groups, it's the BEHAVIOR most people dislike, not the person's sexual preference, race etc.

So am I a homophobe?


I don't understand your logic here. Why would you even have to ask? You just said that being gay doesn't bother you. So, no, you're not a homophobe. It's not even a phobia really, I mean with other phobias people have, they are immensely afraid of whatever the phobia is. Are homophobes really afraid of gay people or do they just hate them? Possibly both.

No you're not a homophobe, you're just an intellectually aware person that feels the same about people who would shove their beliefs in anything down your throat. Like an overly zealous Christian, or atheist, that seems to think that you should believe or not believe whatever they think because it's the only way. Homosexual Flamboyance is the equivalent of Christian Evangelism. No it doesn't bother me that you have your own belief system, yes it does bother me that you're evangelizing it to me. No it doesn't bother me that you're gay, yes it bothers me that you're purposefully acting out just to annoy those around you. End of story.



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 10:26 AM
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reply to post by IamSirDrinksalot
 



How does that work - is he married to your dad?


No, I said my father-in-law is gay. He is my wife’s biological father. He divorced my wife’s mom when my wife was 8 and has been with his gay partner since.

My only point was that I get along fine with him. I don’t dislike people for being gay. I do dislike flamboyantly gay behavior as does the OP.




edit on 1-7-2013 by seabag because: (no reason given)



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 10:53 AM
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I feel like I am bombarded with the gay agenda in media so much that I've actually started disliking them. Not so much for who they are, but more for the image they portray. I didn't used to really care, but now you can't turn on the TV without seeing them queen it up. What is it about gays that they have to make their sexuality known at all times to everyone? I don't constantly tell everyone I'm hetero as I go about my daily business. Also, why do they talk funny and use a fake lisp?



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 11:00 AM
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I keep hearing flamboyant thrown out there and I just want to say for the record that you don't have to be gay to be flamboyant. David Bowie comes to mind.

Lets consider anyways for grins and giggles a few of the many famous flamboyant gay men shall we?

Little Richard
Elton John
Freddy Mercury
Rip Taylor

Imagine standing in line with one of these guys and not knowing who they were. Lets not forget that flamboyant over the top isn't always a bad thing.



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 11:03 AM
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Originally posted by Sandcastler
I feel like I am bombarded with the gay agenda in media so much that I've actually started disliking them. Not so much for who they are, but more for the image they portray. I didn't used to really care, but now you can't turn on the TV without seeing them queen it up. What is it about gays that they have to make their sexuality known at all times to everyone? I don't constantly tell everyone I'm hetero as I go about my daily business. Also, why do they talk funny and use a fake lisp?


Right. Thats what mainstream media is showing us but anyone who knows the media knows that they tell the story they want to believe and truth in reporting isn't always a requirement.



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 11:04 AM
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reply to post by stumason
 


My wife and I have relatives who live in Toronto. We went there the previous summer to visit with my son and daughter and stayed in a hotel that was reasonably priced. When we stopped at my wife's relatives house, they asked us where we were staying. I told them the name of the hotel and where it was located. They started laughing and told us we were staying in the gay section of Toronto. We didn't have any real problems with the hotel, but we did see some strange things going on in the neighborhood. There was a guy riding his bike in his underwear?
We all had a good laugh seeing that.

Our relatives said it was a good thing we didn't visit during the gay parade. They said there were people in the parade taking their clothes off! They said they would have been upset if they were passing buy the parade with kids.

I just think the gay community is trying to force their sexual preference on the rest of society.



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 11:09 AM
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Turn the argument around
Does a homosexual dislike sex between man and woman?
I guess "they" do since they don't practice it?

Does that make them xenophobic also?
The argument is bull# on that aspect because both (gay/straight) do the same thing right?
Homosexual is just being attracted (sexually) to the opposite sex.
Limbo



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 11:38 AM
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Just my 2 cents

I dont agree with what gay people choose to do.
So I dont go around practicing it or promoting it.

That being said,I dont dislike anyone for what they do behind close doors in their personal lives.
It's their individual choice,and as long as they are cool people around me,then its all good.

~Cheers~



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 11:59 AM
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As I'm reading through the responses, several have asked if I'm using my dislike of the behavior to justify my dislike of homosexuality. Honestly, the thought of two men having sex repulses me, it's just the way it is, it's how I feel about it. But I have a lot of feelings about things that I don't act on, I think we all do.

One thing I've noticed about myself, and my family will tell you I've been this way since I was little, is a sense of fairness. That means if I see something that I perceive as unfair, I have strong feelings about it and often act on them, but in a way that's socially responsible and acceptable if at all possible. It might mean simply speaking up or it might mean something more.

Respect is something else I try to practice and also expect. Just because you have the right to do something, doesn't mean it's always a good idea to actually do it. I felt some of these guys were disrespecting me and challenging my tolerance for not only acceptable social behavior, but for the tolerance of straight people in general. I felt like they were purposely trying to annoy people. If their goal is acceptance, why do this? The same reason people intentionally do a lot of things I guess, something more personal.

So the answer is that while I do not "like" homosexuality, I don't automatically dislike the person, but the combination of what I perceive as disrespect combined with inappropriate public behavior pushes past my tolerance for fairness and then becomes a dislike towards that person. If they were straight would I have more tolerance of the bad behavior? More than likely yes, but not much more. Why do I not have any problem with gay men that don't act this way? Because they are within my tolerance levels.

Sometimes I wish I could have this Jesus or Buddha like acceptance of everyone and everything, but I don't, I'm very human. I try to be open minded and receptive to change and consider things people say afterwards to better examine myself at times. I force myself to accept many things because I know it's the "fair" thing to do, despite not personally agreeing with it, logic pushes me towards doing the "right" thing in spite of myself. That said, I'm not apologizing for the way I feel about anything, and don't expect others to either, it's what makes us all unique. A mile in their shoes thing. If everyone could increase their tolerance levels just a bit, I think we'd live in a much better place, and that includes me as well.

Side Issue: I posted this under SOCIAL ISSUES, where there were a number of other threads on the subject, it's now in OFF TOPIC RANT. No reason given and I get the feeling that whoever moved it probably disapproves of my position. Nice.
edit on 1-7-2013 by Paschar0 because: (no reason given)



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 12:14 PM
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reply to post by Paschar0
 


How incredibly honest. I know some won't understand what you're really trying to say. I think I get it and see you're being true to yourself while at least giving some thought to others.



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 12:18 PM
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off-topic post removed to prevent thread-drift


 



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 12:24 PM
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off-topic post removed to prevent thread-drift


 



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 01:59 PM
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Originally posted by muse7
Is it possible to not like black people and brown people without being labeled a racist?

Is it possible to simply dislike homosexual behavior without being labeled a homophobe?



You are a racist/homophobe but you shouldn’tt be all that concerned - all this new openness and acting out by Gays will die down once “they” realize being allowed to marry is a double-edged sword…hmmm.

The issue (and ‘hate crime’) is whether you act out your dislikes as a boss, out in public, or on the highway - BIG problems there…. with you!. I really dislike women who dye they hair in unusual colors, or the greens and reds or shave their heads - I feel they are making a statement about their hate of humanity. But I don’t go around trying to cut their hair, or shouting my dislikes or speaking to them threateningly in lowered voice.

But, I also don’t like being hit on, or touched, by Gay men. That’s a real problem the Gay community will no doubt have face up to someday, maybe soon. Seems to me that uninvited, aggressive physical contact is equivalent to a kind of assault and similar to a hetero male uninvitedly groping a stranger woman in a restaurant or other public space??
edit on 1-7-2013 by havanaja because: left out an important rationale.



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 02:54 PM
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reply to post by Limbo
 


I'd like to post a piece of music which I think it appropriate.

www.youtube.com...

Limbo



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 03:03 PM
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Originally posted by Sandcastler
I feel like I am bombarded with the gay agenda in media so much that I've actually started disliking them. Not so much for who they are, but more for the image they portray. I didn't used to really care, but now you can't turn on the TV without seeing them queen it up. What is it about gays that they have to make their sexuality known at all times to everyone? I don't constantly tell everyone I'm hetero as I go about my daily business. Also, why do they talk funny and use a fake lisp?


I know plenty of straight people that speak with a similar lisp and act flamboyant. I think it's more of a personality thing. Most homosexuals are normal people, they don't even act like that. It's just the popular image in the media and reality TV right now, so that's what you get in the mainstream.



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 03:05 PM
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No, disliking flamboyant behavior in a person of any orientation does not make you a homophobe. Because people of all sexual orientations can be flamboyant, weird, or obnoxious.

It's disliking gays for what they do in the bedroom that in no way concerns you is what makes people homophobes. If you look at them as "lesser" people than straight people that might make you a homophobe. If you try to block them from achieving equal rights with straight people that would make you a homophobe.

People who hate gays overwhelmingly hate them because of what they do behind closed doors. It makes the haters feel "icky" when they think about it. Or, conversely they like it and don't want to admit it, and it makes them hate themselves. There is no valid, logical argument that can be made as to why homosexuality is "wrong" or "unnatural".

What's interesting to me lately is the amount of confrontations humans have because they're "offended". About anything, really. You know what offends me? A hell of a lot of things. What do I do about them? Turn the other cheek. Because unless someone is causing harm to myself or someone around me, or about to endanger someone it's none of my damn business. I'm not a delicate flower who needs her whims catered to. I realize this planet is full of self-absorbed jerks who will offend me on an almost daily basis, but I also realize jerks need somewhere to live too. I enjoy peace and I strongly believe in live and let live, and do as thou whilst.

...and for the record, strong flamboyant behavior annoys me as well. I also have a lot of gay friends and about half of them act that way from time to time. I usually tell them to stop being such a queen, and then we get into a good natured, joking debate about queens.



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 03:19 PM
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One other thing I wanted to point out really quick:

Several people are talking about homosexuals constantly talking about it and being pushy about it. Sorry but heterosexuals do this ALL THE TIME. Watch any show on TV and you'll get people talking about a man marrying a woman, or trying to date one. Young hetero guys talk about women all the time and if anyone even jokingly says something about a guy, every hetero guy in the conversation must immediately confirm his heterosexuality. It's almost like it's required. Its ingrained into our culture, and its what's expected of people. Everyone gets older, marries someone of the opposite sex and has children.

The only reason people think that homosexuals are pushing the agenda is because they are a repressed minority and it hasn't been considered normal for a long time. If you look back to the 60s and 70s, there was a sexual revolution that featured very similar behavior (people taking off clothes during parades, acting lude, musicians exposing themselves and getting arrested, etc). When somebody is repressed, that's exactly what's going to happen. They WILL try to tell everyone about it, because the greater the awareness is, the more likely change will come. In the 30s, it was considered shocking to show lower leg. By the 50s it was upper leg. It eventually led to miniskirts, then bikinis, thongs, "booty" pants, and everything else you see today.

It may seem shocking to some folks, but to me it's just another revolution in society that's been overdue for decades. It will fade away when the oppression stops and they are given equal marriage rights, just like the civil rights movement, the women's suffrage movement, etc etc etc. Complain about it all you'd like, but it's part of reality and people need to start realizing that. Homosexuals aren't going anywhere. Treat them as you would like to be treated as Jesus would say. In ten years tops it will be considered perfectly normal for a same sex couple to be married. People just love to fight change and stick with outdated traditions. Every single movement that has to do with right is met with traditionalists desperately clinging to an old tradition.
edit on 1-7-2013 by Barcs because: (no reason given)



posted on Jul, 1 2013 @ 03:52 PM
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reply to post by muse7
 


I'm actually having a conver§ation about this with a friend of mine.

I too dislike people based on different backgrounds, but not to the extent that I am a full-blown racist/neo-nazi/klan member/whatever. I just believe that some people are more superior to others, regardless of race, sexual orientation, or other factors.

For example, bring me two Christian people. One is fairly moderate views, while thé other is 'jesus jesus fire and brimstone, go to hell if you don't believe'. If I punch the latter person in the face, does this necesarily mean I hate all Christians? This could also be said of race too, put me in a room with Denzel Washington and a typical hoodrat and see who will better earn my respect.

But even with all the facts and figures, you're still going to be hounded until you conform to the PC crap that is prevalent todayin society.


In the meantime, i'll just direct people to 'Everyone's a little bit racist' song from Avenue Q. youtube it.




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