reply to post by Madrusa
well.. i starred that.. because you're right
but there's a little more to it, i try to outline some of that in the OP.
thing is.. i kinda know what my 'personal agenda' is because it's the same thing i've always wanted.. a world where people exist peacefully,
right?.. but to stave off a potential argument there, i came to realize i'm mortal and imperfect, hehe, and any world i might exist in by the
definitions i'm putting forth might not necessarily be "physical" if you know what i mean?
^i'm trying to address as much as possible there in a short time
so.. i do some poking around in certain areas, come across certain people, certain groups who also eventually poke into same areas... i figure i'm on
the right track here.. the thing is, i'm on the outside of all this, not really wanting to be involved in any of it, but the more i "study" it (not
necessarily putting it into practice) the more i see a trend..
-it seems the people on the outside (let's call them 'conspiracy theorists') are always willing to reveal the information they come across..
whereas the people on the inside (let's call them 'masons' etc) are more about concealing the information they come across, if that makes any
my motivations have always been about helping people? giving information and so forth, it contributed to me eventually being homeless.. uhh, that's
what i mean.. i was prepared to give everything away to help people.. i don't regret it, my life has been amazing. meanwhile i see things like
vatican, lodge etc all looking pretty satisfied with themselves... and talk to masons in these topics who transcribe this subject matter to 'eating
dinner' with their family..
in a world like this.. i eventually put even my own personal agenda aside
?.. and just looked for "God"
myself? i don't claim to have found it, but if i do i'll send everyone a postcard
at this point i should probably just say 'i try to have
nothing to do with anyone and everyone', pretty much because even when someone like me voices the concern, someone like you seems to inevitably swing
it back in entirely the other direction, which is fine, because i walk the walk and scratch myself in various places, and as much as it might amuse me
this topic isn't about me, see, i can have these conversations with "normal" people these days, because i don't get all bent out of shape about
how we differ on opinions, but coming to a website like this i would appreciate it if at least -one- message might've gotten through before the whole
"take a look at yourself" thing came up
i continually re-examine myself
even now i'm hesitating sending this response..
because the single-line
comment after yours wasn't entirely comfortable either. and that was from a gold-contributer no less
it was nice though, how the matter wasn't conveniently tossed aside entirely even though i'm sure you both took the time to thoroughly investigate
the links, i'm assuming you're already familiar in all this subject matter? *wink*
so no worries, i'll re-examine myself now as i always do.. maybe this is what is going on in those lodges? a lot of men searching the inner
recesses of their souls and stuff