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One hypothesis says it’s because women are naturally more emotional, expressive, and empathetic. another is that women are socially weaker—they must wear their compliance on their faces, telegraphing to any and all that they have no interest in upsetting the status quo.
emotion labor, defined as the effort “to create and maintain positive feelings and alleviate and rectify negative ones in self or in others,” involves managing your feelings to transmit a certain impression; disguise unhappiness, defuse anger, alleviate pain, and smile when they receive a disappointing gift.
in a study, women participants believed their failure to smile under certain circumstances will lead to social strain. Male participants assumed no one would notice their facial expressions. Lucky them.
the psychological dissonance female flight attendants experience after hours of forced gaiety (the industry parlance for this state of numbness is “going robot”), often results in falling into depression, and losing sight of their true selves.
Originally posted by tgidkp
was that too depressing?do you suffer from Bitchy Resting Face...?
People readily identified smiling women as female and wrathful men as male, but they took longer and stumbled more often when confronted with furious female countenances or beaming male ones.
in simulated job interviews, female participants salt their speech with smiles, while male test subjects are more likely to adopt neutral (read: alluringly strong and stoic) expressions.
one type of grin “obeys the will, but the second is only put into play by the sweet emotions of the soul.”
Less clear is whether women are born with superior smile equipment or whether they develop those muscles over a lifetime of practice.
In the workplace, women who smile too little are shunned as bitchy, but women who overplay their kindness appear incompetent.
Originally posted by tgidkp
reply to post by TrueBrit
I am really glad to see that you have such well developed thoughts on this matter. so do I. . n fact, I think of points directly at the most deeply rooted problems in our society ...the type of problems that people don't even know they have because they spend a lifetime unacknowledged.
since it appears thatno one is reading the thread, I will take a moment to elaborate on a different face of this same problem.
earlier this week I was visiting my mother and she happened to be watching the truly horrible television program "the bachelorette", and on the show they were having a truly horrible "Mr america pageant" with the male contestants of the show. as with most pageants, there was a portion of the program dedicated to the sharing of each contestant's talent with the judging panel.
I was disheartened, but not surprised, to see most of the men make a mockery of themself, and only a few were willing to share an actual talent. I complained to my mother about how typical it is of men to display this behavior. she responded that "at least they were being good sports about it".
but to me, a good sport would openly acknowledge that they have no talent worth sharing, and gracefully bow out of the race. but no. they will rather rely on the social etiquette of self effacement, allowing himself and the audience an escape route.
and that is the whole point of this thread: people (everybody) wants an escape route out of reality.
the average person is just so terrified of what lies beneath the surface.
and worse: the no-talent "good sport" always wins.