reply to post by purplemer
there are five loves
1.Mania – Manic love is almost not a love at all. The word “lust” is probably not strong enough – “obsession” is closer to the word.
This is the love of possession. I “mania” that which I obsessively desire to own. It is generally seen as taking over the “lover” like
insanity – thus the connection to modern concepts of madness (kleptomania, pyromania). It is like the opposite of a phobia – an obsessive need
to avoid something. “Mania” is translated as “madness” and “beside yourself” in Acts 26.
1.Eros – Eros is obviously the root word for “erotic,” but it does not describe sexual love only, it actually describes all emotional love; the
feeling of love. Eros love is that insatiable desire to be near the target of this love. The exciting, passionate, nervous feelings that sweep over
people in the appropriate circumstances. This is the love that says “I love how you make me feel.” As an emotion, Eros changes, sometimes
suddenly. Remember that it is entirely based on circumstances and on the target of its emotion. As an emotion, alone it is morally neutral, however,
it can just as easily lead to lust (sinful desire) as it can passion. It is also a good picture to think of Eros as the fruit and flowers of a new
relationship. Eros is not a bad thing, but it is also not a “good” thing. The word Eros does not appear in the Bible. I have some more thoughts
on the way “eros” thinking affects our interaction with sex and intimacy at chrismlegg.com...
1.Philos – Philos love, or brotherly/friendship love, is the next kind we will look at. Philos describes the love between two people who have
common interests and experiences, or a fondness for. Hemophiliacs apparently seemed to ancient doctors to have a “fondness” to bleeding, for
example. Unlike Eros, which pulses up and down like waves on the ocean, Philos steadily grows, like a building being constructed stone by stone. For
this reason, when close friends are separated for a while and reunited, they will often say “it is like we picked up exactly where we left off.”
Philos is half about the circumstances, and half about the commitment of two people to one another; it says “I love who we are together,” or in
case of a non person: “I am fond of this food.” Philos love generally grows over time except in the case of some kind of betrayal. It is
commonly used in the New Testament, as in Matt. 10:37, John 12:25, and Revelation 3:19.
1.Storgy – We will not spend much time here; storgy is the love one has for a dependent. It is commonly called “motherly love.” It is entirely
based on the relationship between the “lover” and the “lovee.” When the dependent is no longer dependent, this love remains only in its
emotional remnants. It is one of the stronger loves, because it involves a commitment that relies on only one trait of the receiver – that he or
she is dependent. This type of love is toxic to a marriage under normal circumstances. Marriages that look more like a mother/son or
father/daughter relationship is moving quickly downhill.
1.Agapeo – Agape love is the final of the five loves we look at here. Agape love is entirely about the lover, and has nothing whatsoever to do with
the one loved. Agape love, in its purest form, requires no payment or favor in response. The most common word for God’s love for us is Agape (I
John, John 3:16) and the love we are commanded to have for one another (Matt. 5:44, I Cor. 13). This lack of input from the recipient makes it
possible for us to love our enemies even though we may not like them or the situation they have put us in – because Agape love is not in any way
dependent on circumstances; it says “I love you because I choose/commit to.” Unlike eros or philos, Agape creates a straight line that neither
fades or grows (!) in its perfect form (which of course only exists from God outward) Oddly enough, even though many people marry out of eros love
alone, they make vows that speak of commitment despite any circumstance: richer/poorer, better/worse, sickness/health. This kind of love is about a
commitment to the very best for another, no matter what emotions or feelings exist! You can see why in the King James Version of the Bible, Agape was
usually translated as “charity.” It is a love freely given, and freely committed to. For a more in depth look at its aspects, look at I
Corinthians chapter 13.