posted on May, 1 2013 @ 01:54 AM
Oh my, I'm very much relating to your pain and anguish, onequestion. No words can measure up to the pain, but know that you are not alone in your
My dad died in August 2010....
I saw him detiorate for years, and was fortunate enough to spend some "alone" time with him as he was ailing. It's a horrible thing to go
When we knew it was the end, I saw him as often as I could. I told him, Daddy, please, if I don't see you again before you go somewhere else, please
let me know where you are. He said he would.
The day after he died, my mom gave me his watch. I put it on my wrist, and noticed the time on it. That watch had been a significant item of his,
and that's a longer story than you need to hear now.... but, I stayed with my mom the night he died, and then finally went home.
I looked at the watch while sitting and grieving...the grief came in waves like tsunamis. My entire body shuddered, uncontrollably, and I was unable
to control the weeping in the first few days....but I looked at the not-running watch (no battery), and it had moved several seconds from where it was
when Mom gave it to me.
I knew it was a signal from him. Since then, it has moved again (NOT while I was wearing it)...and he has come to me in my dreams several times. He
looks young, is invigorated and fine, and we have talks and spend time together. It's wonderful to wake up in the morning and think, "I got to see
Daddy last night!"
You can survive this - it is horrifically painful, but it does recede. Remember how much you loved her, and how much she loved you. You WILL see her
The last note I wrote to my dad, and was too emotional to read it to him (I asked my mom and brother to read it to him for me) was the words from the
song, "Love, Me."
"If you get there before I do,
don't give up on me.
I'll meet you when my chores are through,
I don't know how long I'll be....
but I'm not gonna let you down,
[Daddy] wait and see.....
and between now and then,
til I see you again,
I'll be loving you.
Tears in my eyes now for your loss and your pain. Let it wash over you...don't fight it. It comes and goes. It hurts like hell, but....
it does get easier.
Kindest compassion and sincere love to you, dear. I'm thinking of you, and of your grandmother, and him, now.
You will see her again, and she loves you still.