I am extremely reluctant to post this. Specifically wondering if anyone else has seen this.

reply to post by DarwinVsJesus


wow, extremely creepy. Thefact that it has been all this time and all these encounters and you still haven't come to terms with it/him, makes it that much more erie to me, I pray I never this thing it gave me goose bups reading your testimony, so I absolutely agree with you on it being pure evil.

Originally posted by pryingopen3rdeye

Originally posted by DarwinVsJesus
"what can you learn from pure evil?".

how to defeat it,


courage, strength in the light, in its ability to destroy darkness

I like this. Just because I'm a Satanist doesn't mean I don't believe in light vs dark. I think the whole "white light" is the same in certain cases; and equally evil. White light religions have often called for animal sacrifice (judaism, islam (and I otherwise islam is a beautiful religion overall. After all, islam comes from al-salam. "The Peace". Not peace, but The Peace. Al-Salam wa Aleykoum "may The Peace be upon you") etc, have called for animal sacrifice and consider themselves white light religions. Many white light pagan religions also use animal sacrifice.

We Satanists abhor animal sacrifice. It's despicable and cowardly to try and harness the agony of an animal in its death throes for a so-called white-light purpose. It's better to kill an animal than a human being? No, because life is life, and killing either is a wretched, cowardly thing to do.

a quote from a chapter of the Satanic bible called "On the Choice of a Human Sacrifice"

"The “white” magician, wary of the consequences involved in the killing of a human being, naturally utilizes birds, or other “lower” creatures in his ceremonies. It seems these sanctimonious wretches feel no guilt in the taking of a non-human life, as opposed to a human’s. The fact of the matter is that if the “magician” is worthy of his name, he will be uninhibited enough to release the necessary force from his own body, instead of from an unwilling and undeserving victim!"

so the white-light religions are just as wretched as any. Animals are not lower than us. They are our equals. However, the idea of light as a positive, natural force that tends toward self-empowerment, IS a very good thing and something absolutely vital to our survival as conscious creatures.

my husband's theory is they are alien species brought to this planet, and are in fact, communicating with each other in languages we can't hear. lol (animals, i mean)

i'm resisting the urge to launch into a self defense tirade, primarily because i am not entirely sure what the behavior of your family has to do with other people. i suppose you could draw a correlation, however, i'm pretty sure i could draw a correlation to just about anything.

would you like to compare battle wounds to see who has the biggest gripe? do you presume your circumstances or similar circumstances of others, in limited but boisterous quantities, is worthy of establishing an entire school of ethical thought and how those things should be forced upon others you may disagree with? this i find a conundrum you've built for yourself. all should be free to self govern. except those you disagree with. people who force others to do things against their wills, are incorrectly disrespecting the free will of others, but it is okay if you do so to people you disagree with. this creates a long chain of pot/kettle black statements that just never ends. i consider that to be a waste of time.

reply to post by DarwinVsJesus


Thank you for your kind words; it always feels good to know that you've "reached through" to someone

Tell me, has the situation improved or worsened since you started this thread? Would be interesting to know if this that haunts you has noticed that you are gaining support from the outside world, strengthening your confidence and building up a resistance towards it... Knowing that you are not alone is the first step to gain confidence and to empower the flaming sword that is your soul (got all poetic there suddenly, lol).

A psychic sounds like a good idea. Watch out for charlatans though. Use your gut-feeling on this one. Avoid those that make a great deal out of parafernalia (sp?) like insence, magic symbols, crystal balls, dried bat wings or whatnot. They are often very insecure in their own practice and need a lot of items to fool themselves. Also watch out for those who are overly interested in making money off your suffering.
I'd suggest you go see two or three of them for shorter sessions just to compare and see which one works better.
Do not visit the sessions under the influence of anything, it will blur your perception and give you an uncertain outcome.

Remember: what you need to learn is how to "close" yourself spiritually, how to shut out "the other side". If you learn that, and it isn't very hard, half the battle (the hardest part) is already won.
Good luck with everything, It would be lovely to hear about your progress. You can always U2U me but you absolutely don't have to.

Just remember that the key is your own soul and its immortal, indestructable, beautiful power!

Originally posted by DarwinVsJesus

Originally posted by Raud
I am amazed with how much attention this thread has gained, for better and for worse.
Some people seem to be writing the most outragous things, and I don't know if I need to tell you this but take any given suggestion or advice into careful consideration before attempting anything, even mine.
- snipped to save space-

I agree. Why would your fearsome jehova even let him in? don't give me that BS about demons ruling the world and everyone. Why would god give them any power?

I've always found it incredibly disgusting that people 'pray' for diseased people. Pray to the same god who allowed the disease to grow. Sure, makes perfect sense. If you are a weak, tiny, groveling mouse who wishes to be enslaved and in love with a god you must also fear, I guess that's your business.

I will continue to look upon you as a fellow traveler and friend and avoid disgusting you by any my prayer for you. (not sarcasm or hateful, just true)

Your post I read farther on in this thread bolsters my opinion that, at heart, you are struggling to be a good person and that is all any of us can do. Your disgust at the abuse of animals and the fact that the teachings you follow abhor it also are good to see. There are no excuses for abuse and torture of animals, regardless of what lifestyle you follow.

I wanted to take a minute to give you some background so that you might understand why I'm sensitized to the topic and why discussing the satanic lifestyle is difficult for me. (misinformation always does damage regardless of the topic and leaves its mark even when you are aware it is deceptive)

Southern Indiana has a long history of paganism. I didn't realize how widely it was known 'til I heard a crack joke on the old sitcom Night Court. The guy that played the judge was using his vacation to tour the places one of his fav jazz musicians had played cross country during a past year. The one lawyer (John L.) said, "Be sure to swing by French Lick, IN during the Cloven Hoof Festival." French Lick Springs was known for its sulfur springs and the besides people bathing in it, it was bottled and sold as Pluto Water. I'm sure you're familiar with the connection. The label featured the standard devil-type figure and the French Lick Sheraton even named its lounge Lucifer's Den. (believe it or not Hendrix & Billy Gibbons actually jammed there one night in the '60s) It is no accident that the most dangerous nuclear isotope ever created is named after the classic Greek/Roman gate to Hell, Plutonium.

Again, I'm aware this not the same as the path you follow... Just background.

During the last half of the 1980s the entire country had a lot of people "playing" at being Satanists. Apparently they'd not done any of the research you have and got wrapped up with fast talking charismatic types much like the fire and brimstone preachers who do Christianity so much damage.

Here are three quick personal examples of my exposure to the kind of deluded, mentally ill morons:
#1. I'll get the worst out of the way first. It still upsets me to think of it... We supported a county courthouse in our area and their computer network was my responsibility. I was working in the prosecutor's office the Monday morning a hysterical young mother called to report that her ex had taken their 4 year old daughter with him to his "coven's" little get together in the woods over the weekend and she'd had Xs cut into all her fingertips so that everyone in the group got to take a taste of virgin blood. As father and grandfather, I have a REALLY hard time with that.

#2. The local university where my professor/employer worked had a string of ritual animal mutilations on school property. It wasn't just a carcass. There was Satanic stuff hung from the trees and burned candles and torches left behind. At the shop, I said something about how much that kind of stuff upset me and my boss's wife made the comment, "Oh, I don't think they're real Satanists. It's just some kids playing around with it." My response was, "With all due respect, what d*mned difference does that make if it is one of your kids that gets grabbed if they tire of small animals!? They should be found and stopped."

#3. We used to have a beautiful site in Hoosier National Forest called Hemlock Cliffs. My bass player went to take his wife one weekend and noticed that the lot was full of expensive sport cars with out of state plates. On the way down the trail to the three waterfalls, he saw a ring of hooded people in the meadow chanting. When the guy with his hands lifted saw him, everyone turned as one and stared 'til they left. It's been allowed to grow up now to where you can't even see the cliffs because of the trees & I believe it was ruined because of people like that.

I've said my piece. I still wish you well. Maybe you understand me a little better....

reply to post by CornShucker


And how is this not OT?
I guess you are just trying to be nice, but how does your post relate to the topic at hand? This thread is hard to sort through as it is.

Besides, you are confusing satanism with devil worship. They are not the same.
The former is a serious life philosophy that has (for obvious reasons) been demonized even worse than Islam has been lately.
The latter is about people with serious problems who condone rape, murder and oppression and somehow relate that to worshipping some distorted idea of a diety that they probably know nothing about in the first place (i.e. they are just crazy people).

Now I went OT as well and I wish to be forgiven by the mods. Or not.

Originally posted by Raud
reply to post by CornShucker

 

And how is this not OT?
I guess you are just trying to be nice, but how does your post relate to the topic at hand? This thread is hard to sort through as it is.

Besides, you are confusing satanism with devil worship. They are not the same.
The former is a serious life philosophy that has (for obvious reasons) been demonized even worse than Islam has been lately.
The latter is about people with serious problems who condone rape, murder and oppression and somehow relate that to worshipping some distorted idea of a diety that they probably know nothing about in the first place (i.e. they are just crazy people).

Now I went OT as well and I wish to be forgiven by the mods. Or not.

I was under the impression that it was part of an ongoing conversation that DVJ & I have been having & thought in the context of what we each had posted there was the possibility that I was being lumped in with the small minded [whatever] in the comments I quoted.

I clearly stated I understood the difference between the principles he follows (as he himself outlined earlier in the thread) and the misinformation that causes some to lump [small s]atinism and [capitol S]atanism.

It took me a long time to care enough to join a conversation at ATS. My mistake... I might be back, but probably not.

reply to post by CornShucker


OK, my bad. I was out of line.
I wish apologize to both you and DvJ. It was all due to honest ignorance; I hadn't gone through the whole thread just yet (see below)

reply to post by DarwinVsJesus


So, now that I've read all of your post in this thread I've gotten a whole new perspective on the entrie deal. It should be noted that I tried reading all posts but I got partly deaf from the high frequency nonsense in 9 out of 10 posts. Mods should really put some effort into this, a person is seeking help and the OT is obviously making it worse for him!

Nevermind.

I have to say again that I can't even begin to understand the pain and stress you are under. I also agree more and more that this entity might not be the sort of malignant "spirit" that I first thought it could have been. What it is, on the other hand, is totally off my charts. Sorry, but I am at a loss for advice. Keep fighting it is all I have to say.

However, I see a pattern emerging from reading about your life; a pattern of guilt and misunderstanding.
The guilt- induced from a guilt-ridden religion. Guilt from bad choices that might have affected others. Guilt from family situations.
I know you know, but there is nothing to feel guilty over. One should not underestimate how much our upbringing shapes us, rooting deep within. What we learn as kids is really hard to get rid of. Did we learn guilt, and without a proper, understandable explanation, it grows with the speed of a child's imagination to something huge, something mysterious, dark and probably dangerous...
From what I've read about your life, there is much agony and sorrow, but I see nothing to feel guilty over, nothing.

About the misunderstanding, it is a little like my "worst fear" kind of scenarios: having an experience and people not believeing you or pragmatically discrediting you. Like, I am feeling these feelings, I am seeing these phenomena, I am believeing these things.....and all you get for a response is either silence or "there is something wrong with you". A life like that is enought to drive one crazy, if not into an early grave.

You write that stress reduction is what seems to help best. I think "stress" is an understatement from what you've told. The headaches, the bipolarity, the paranoia....and all the medications that come with it- I am truly amazed with how you manage to pull through with your sanity intact! That's gotta count for something!
You are a fighter; one helluva warrior!
Maybe this entity has acknowledged that? That you are some sort of inexhaustable source of energy that it just needs to convert into something it can feed of: fear. Just a theory.

The meds probably does more harm than good and there surely is a way to cure all of your problems but I'm not telling you it's easy. Just the side effects of stopping some of the treatment is a killer, just like getting of smack, nicotine, alcohol or whatever. Still, it can be done. The question is; will the entity go away as you heal or can you only heal if it goes away? This is for me to ask and for you to find out I'm afraid.

Funny thing, we share the same music taste. Though I am more into black metal.
Where people only hear darkness and evil, I hear independence, hope and pride. Windir backs me up alot.

I hope you get some answers soon and that you learn how to combat this thing and all the other issues.
Getting rid of stress is most likely the best way to go about it; it's like a universal cure for everything. Reading through this thread doesn't help really....

Stay cool and stay strong. I couldn't have lived through half what you've covered so far. I am astonished, amazed and inspired by your story. You are quite something extra, I assure you that.

Originally posted by Murgatroid
reply to post by euwhajavb

 

Originally posted by euwhajavb
So... could we get one news report maybe? It always says "someone I know" or "my aunt" but no news stories you'd think if someone clawed their own face off it would make at least local news...

Is it REALLY possible that someone who has been an ATS member for 8 years and does NOT know that the media is one the greatest forms of manipulation and is being used to keep the citizens docile and unaware?

Thomas Jefferson said it far better than I can:

"The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers." ~ Thomas Jefferson

“The most truthful part of a newspaper is the advertisements.” ~ Thomas Jefferson

"Information control is mind control." ~ Dick Sutphen

"People everywhere confuse what they read in newspapers with news." ~ A.J. Liebling

Mass media is the most powerful tool used by the ruling class to manipulate the masses. It shapes and molds opinions and attitudes and defines what is normal and acceptable.

Mind Control Theories and Techniques used by Mass Media

Local news is what I was referring to. But I just bought a board to play with myself so we'll just see I guess.

reply to post by DarwinVsJesus


Why are you talking about Christ now when you ran at least 5 people off your thread for it? Hypocrite much? Oh that's right, as long as you are criticizing, it's ok.

Your suggestion that people are disgusting for praying for a diseased person because God must have created the disease is a lack of understanding of both the laws of God AND nature. Man using his free will and power of intellect in science creates an unnatural type of virus(AIDS, because it was partly bionengineered) ends up with cancers. Man, by dumping toxic wastes into a canal ends up causing cancers in local residents. You see, this all happened by man using his will and intellect. This is not God saying hum I think I will just put cancer in this person.....
Genetic issues can be explained by a combination of external factors and karmic conditions which carry through the DNA.
Likewise, some conditions do require physical intervention, and there is no reason for man not to use his will and intellect for creating cures.

reply to post by ThirdEyeofHorus


In the T&C it is expressed that posts should be on-topic to avoid drifting away from the thread's purpouse.
To believe in Jesus or not isn't the topic at hand, thus the thread is being flooded with an irrelevant discussion which in turn might cause further harm to the OP's personal status.
I wish that mods could pay more attention to this. The thread could easily be cut by 50%

15f.) Relevant Content: You will not Post messages that are clearly outside of the stated topic of any forums or disrupt a forum by deliberately posting repeated irrelevant messages or copies of identical messages (also known as "flooding").

23) Violation: Violation of any aspect of these Terms and Conditions of Use and the Terms and Conditions of Membership are subject to our Actions for general abuse and violations, or in extreme cases, immediate banning of your username/IP from the domains and/or the removal of your email/password from the database. You agree that, all disputes, of any type, regarding any transgression or disagreement with the policies of TAN, or the decisions of one of TAN or administrative staff are final.

I suggest you read it

Originally posted by Raud
reply to post by CornShucker

 

OK, my bad. I was out of line.
I wish apologize to both you and DvJ. It was all due to honest ignorance; I hadn't gone through the whole thread just yet (see below)

reply to post by DarwinVsJesus

My apologies to you and DvJ if I've muddied the waters. My intent was to show that he and I have more in common than we have different and that charlatans on both sides of the "beliefs" issue make it bad for all of us.

No hard hard feelings, Seriously. I'll take your advice to heart & try to avoid confusing tangents in my posts in the future.

Originally posted by Raud
reply to post by ThirdEyeofHorus

 

In the T&C it is expressed that posts should be on-topic to avoid drifting away from the thread's purpouse.
To believe in Jesus or not isn't the topic at hand, thus the thread is being flooded with an irrelevant discussion which in turn might cause further harm to the OP's personal status.
I wish that mods could pay more attention to this. The thread could easily be cut by 50%

Short possible OT question:Once personal beliefs of the OP were introduced into the thread, and advice including mediums, pentagrams & other occult leaning measures were introduced were added to the mix, did that not exacerbate the problem? That 50% cut would hardly be honest and fair if it only included references to Jesus.

Reminder.....

Please stay on topic and discuss it rather than each other.
Go After the Ball, Not the Player!

You are responsible for your own posts.

We expect civility and decorum within all topics.



Terms and Conditions of Use--Please Review

Originally posted by undo
my husband's theory is they are alien species brought to this planet, and are in fact, communicating with each other in languages we can't hear. lol (animals, i mean)

i'm resisting the urge to launch into a self defense tirade, primarily because i am not entirely sure what the behavior of your family has to do with other people. i suppose you could draw a correlation, however, i'm pretty sure i could draw a correlation to just about anything.

would you like to compare battle wounds to see who has the biggest gripe? do you presume your circumstances or similar circumstances of others, in limited but boisterous quantities, is worthy of establishing an entire school of ethical thought and how those things should be forced upon others you may disagree with? this i find a conundrum you've built for yourself. all should be free to self govern. except those you disagree with. people who force others to do things against their wills, are incorrectly disrespecting the free will of others, but it is okay if you do so to people you disagree with. this creates a long chain of pot/kettle black statements that just never ends. i consider that to be a waste of time.

edit on 3-5-2013 by undo because: (no reason given)

I strongly dislike so-called white-light, right-hand religions. I strongly dislike sweeping statements to the effect of "I have the truth, and you don't. And if you don't submit to my god, you'll suffer".

Once, when I was 11 or 12 years old, and a friend of mine had a picture from a playboy magazine. I actually didn't even see it, but I was near it. My father shook me and screamed as loud as I could and said "If you died today you'd be burning in hell!".

I had my childhood taken from me.

I don't care if other people want to believe it. But keep it away from me. Keep it out of our #ing laws. Let gays marry (how could god condemn any loving relationship?). Its not that I thing I'm a special case, but christians *don't* self-govern, they are subservient to a tyrannical, maniacal, petty, vicious, angry god who demands self-glorification and nothing less.



On the question of pure evil, I've come to this conclusion, as I've been thinking about it a lot.

By encountering pure evil, we learn what evil feels like. There is a certain feeling of 'tightness' and 'agitation' we feel in the face of pure evil. Once we know what this is , we know how to dispel it, how to avoid it, and how to identify when it creeps into our lives.

Sober life has taught me one thing. Pure evil can release it's grip if *you* pull away. And it is the love of our fellow creatures that makes this plane a positive one.

When I was still addicted to drugs, I would run out and get incredibly sick. Not just physically sick, but a state of complete dysphoria. Everything makes you cry. Even spongebob ripping his pants. Seriously. I used to feel sick, sad, exhausted, and anxious, and my dog needed to go out. She would look up at me and I would feel so guilty. One day I promised her I would be well again and she would never have to wait for a sluggish addict to get the nerve to take her out.

That day has come.

I hope this makes sense. This is the pure evil I've encountered, beyond just evil beings.

Perhaps this entity, though evil, does have a purpose. It's like being forced to stare into yourself and see all of the hideous mistakes you've made.

Originally posted by CornShucker

Originally posted by Raud
reply to post by ThirdEyeofHorus

 

In the T&C it is expressed that posts should be on-topic to avoid drifting away from the thread's purpouse.
To believe in Jesus or not isn't the topic at hand, thus the thread is being flooded with an irrelevant discussion which in turn might cause further harm to the OP's personal status.
I wish that mods could pay more attention to this. The thread could easily be cut by 50%

Short possible OT question:Once personal beliefs of the OP were introduced into the thread, and advice including mediums, pentagrams & other occult leaning measures were introduced were added to the mix, did that not exacerbate the problem? That 50% cut would hardly be honest and fair if it only included references to Jesus.

It would be absolutely fair if it cut references to jesus. I have repeatedly asked for this. I stated my beliefs to be honest and I didn't expect so much goddamn ignorance about them. I'm just stunned at this. Being told I don't have the truth.

I am very thankful so many people added their thoughts. I did, however, repeatedly ask to stop having people tell me about jesus. I then provided several *personal, private, and difficult* stories to explain why.

The reason I don't like hearing them is because I feel *judged*. I don't like it.

Originally posted by ThirdEyeofHorus
reply to post by DarwinVsJesus

 

Why are you talking about Christ now when you ran at least 5 people off your thread for it? Hypocrite much? Oh that's right, as long as you are criticizing, it's ok.

Your suggestion that people are disgusting for praying for a diseased person because God must have created the disease is a lack of understanding of both the laws of God AND nature. Man using his free will and power of intellect in science creates an unnatural type of virus(AIDS, because it was partly bionengineered) ends up with cancers. Man, by dumping toxic wastes into a canal ends up causing cancers in local residents. You see, this all happened by man using his will and intellect. This is not God saying hum I think I will just put cancer in this person.....



Genetic issues can be explained by a combination of external factors and karmic conditions which carry through the DNA.
Likewise, some conditions do require physical intervention, and there is no reason for man not to use his will and intellect for creating cures.

okay, you brought it up. Opening this can of worms is a mistake. The 'there is evil and suffering because of free will" is bull#. We don't have free will, if you believe god is real. It's like on futurama. You're free to not pay your taxes, and free to visit the pain monster when you don't!

Do not forget that it was supposedly only because adam "sinned" that god, rather than forgive Adam, turned this entire world into a planet of suffering, turmoil, and anguish.

If god is so keen on forgiveness, why didn't he just forgive adam and let it go? If love keeps no record of wrongs, why is there a "book of life" and eternal punishment for sinners? that sounds like a literal record of wrongs.

Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?

Sorry, buddy. I fully understand genetics, disease, medicine, and also your feeble scripture. I probably know it better than you do.

until *you* can understand the true problem of evil, instead of making it all man's fault. It man's fault! the world is hideous because of US. Bull#. God either can't, or won't stop it. In either case, he's not god. Why design a #ty place for us to live? Because he's cruel, capricious, malevolent.

reply to post by Raud


I love black metal. Vinterland is such a beautiful, expressive band. I also really love funeral doom metal like mournful congregation. I think they have done a great job making expressive music. Listen to www.youtube.com... that one and you can really hear the guitars crying out.

To me, this so-called negative music, is almost like a cleansing ritual. And death metal, I think, it's extremely empowering.

Originally posted by DarwinVsJesus
On the question of pure evil, I've come to this conclusion, as I've been thinking about it a lot.

By encountering pure evil, we learn what evil feels like. There is a certain feeling of 'tightness' and 'agitation' we feel in the face of pure evil. Once we know what this is , we know how to dispel it, how to avoid it, and how to identify when it creeps into our lives.

Sober life has taught me one thing. Pure evil can release it's grip if *you* pull away. And it is the love of our fellow creatures that makes this plane a positive one.

That sounds completely familiar... Same feeling I got in the house I told you about. One good thing (as far as I know) is that the phenomenon/entity has never touched you. The night I finally was injured was my last night in the house.

I once had a professional tell me that there is no such thing as "evil" only mental illness. Anyone that can say that has never been in its presence...

I'm glad you're in a better place these days, and will continue to wish you only the best.