oh the dreaded land snail!
i remember back in the olden days when the feared snails stormed the beach!
we only had 4 months to prepare before they broke the perimeter of our town line.
they were stealthy,only traveling in the early morning,when the dew was fresh.
while us silly humans ignorantly enjoyed our morning coffee,watching the sun rise,
they moved un noticed,preparing to attack!
our only defences where the sun to dry out their caustic,slimey trail,or the occasional child on a bicycle,
crushing their impenetrable shell with the tires on their bikes. what brave souls!
other methods were deployed like chemical warfare,where we put 1/2 cans of beer out to lure them to their demise,
but alas,the councill deemed this inhumane,because it wasted beer.
simply picking them up and discarding them was way too risky,because of the repulsive slime they produced.
finally we devised a plan to banish this evil enemy.
pots of boiling water and garlic,with a hint of white wine and onions were used to boil the enemy into submission.
and like the aztec warriors in by gone days,we too ate the enemy's flesh,to gain their strength!
that is the story of how we defeated the terrorist threat of the godless land snail!
use this knowledge florida! you too can defeat this evil empire of slimey doom!!!