reply to post by mysteryskeptic
Hey there mysteryskeptic,i honestly don't know-i really think i would strive to stay awake harder,if it happened tonight.I would want to ask him some
things,that i did'nt know to ask then.At that time,i wanted to keep on looking-but i really could not keep my eyes open.I felt exhausted,like it was
almost painful to stay awake,like the staring up into his face drained me.
I wonder why such a strange-looking thing,and the way it arrived did'nt freak me out completely-it just did'nt.I remember looking from the
silhouette,back to the face,back to the silhouette-trying desperately to be sure if it was my late father-it sure did look like his
build,tall,slender,but not overly thin.I was Straining to make out even the slightest bit of clue,but aside from being of his build,there was
nothing.And it was just patiently standing there being gawked at,not moving,no sound-till the overwhelming desire to sleep came over me.To tell the
truth,i did sense almost a sort of sympathy coming from him,a sadness-but maybe that was projection from my side,i cannot be sure.In hindsight,had he
sent out that vibe to me-it would not have been misplaced,thats for sure!
I did meet my biological mom once,sweet old bird,but she clearly did'nt want to talk about the past-not really fair of her,i guess-but she did tell me
she had no choice but to give me up-she was young,unmarried,unemployed,alone,her own mother died when she was 10-she did'nt really talk about her own
father-i got the idea that aside from the daughter she had a few years after she gave me up,she pretty much neglected to keep up ties with most of her
extended family,like aunts,uncles,etc.
But when i mentioned that my adoptive mother told me the name of my biological father-that it was listed on the birth certificate as Terry Vickers-she
almost had an anxiety attack-she shouted "No,no! where would she get that name from?!? No,that was not his name!" She was Really upset.When i asked
her "Well do you mind telling me-what Was his name?" (which i did'nt think was unreasonable) she started blubbering:"Ohhh it was so long ago-i dont
remember! I think it was Peter!" She seemed afraid,almost.
Well.I just let it slide then,most adopted kids never get to meet their birth mom,and i hated her being so panicky and uncomfortable.She seemed to
have a great deal of animosity towards my adoptive mother-although i never told her of the abuse,the unhappiness,it was like she knew anyway-i felt
that would've been cruel to tell her-and it was'nt like she could do anything about it at that stage-the past is done.It was good to meet with her-but
there was'nt going to be much info forthcoming,that much was plain to see.
So i think,maybe it Was my late adoptive dad.Or something benign-i've heard that shadowpeople are usually terrifying,or at least inducing some fear in
those who see them-so maybe this was another type of entity altogether.He sure was black as the essence of blackness though,like blackness distilled
and reduced.Sort of concentrate of shadow
Btw,i did have a dream of my late father once,about 2 years ago.I was standing in what looked like the backyard of his FM friend,who gave me to my
adoptive mother.He was leaning on a wall,looking satisfied and at peace,which was nice.He was dressed as in life,slacks ,and his fave V-neck jersey
over a shirt, and the Indiana Jones-style hat he liked to wear.He was a farmer/farm manager,a true son of the land.He always had this
mysterious,enigmatic little smile,in life,and in the dream too.I glanced back at him,he was standing a few meters off and behind me-we did'nt say a
word,but it was really good to see him,it was comfortable,a nice dream i treasure.Because what i did get from him,the vibe-was that he was happy and
at peace with how my life was going-as in,no worries now
edit on 5-4-2013 by Raxoxane because: typo