Domestic Abuse Law - Scotland

This week the Police Force in Scotland was reorganised, and as a result new facebook and twitter feeds were created. One of the first tweets made was a link to their new website and a page with information about Domestic Abuse and what constitutes it.

Link

I was amazed when I read it.

The first part it fairly obvious talking about physical abuse and then the page goes on to say

There is a common misconception that domestic abuse is just physical abuse. This is not the case. Domestic abuse can be physical, sexual, and emotional or mental abuse.

and towards the end we have the following

Mental/emotional abuse includes: Threats (including threats of violence); criticism and name calling; controlling what you do, where you go and who you speak to; threatening your children, isolating you from friends and family; accusing you of being unfaithful; threatening to 'out' your sexual orientation to family, friends or work or to reveal your HIV/AIDS status.

Now don't get me wrong I'm not in favour of bullying or anything like that but according to this you could be charged for critisising your partner. What does that mean ? If you complain about the wifes cooking or driving she could report you.

Name calling. Ok if you swore at somebody, called them the b word or the c word they could get upset. But what if you call them something else other than their actual name could you be in trouble ?

Controlling what you do, where you go, or who you speak to .... so your partner/wife/husband can do what they like, go where they like and speak to whoever they want and you have no say in the matter.

Accusing of being unfaithful .... so your partner/wife/husband can go and see somebody else, you can't stop them, and if you dare to say your not happy because you think they are up to something, you are the bad person.


Does anyone else think that this law is way over the top and frankly is quite unworkable.

I do actually know somebody who got arrested and ended in court because he shouted at his wife about the state of the house being so untidy. I don't know what te outcome of the case was although I don't think the couple are still together.

Notice also that as soon as one side or the other makes a complaint to the Police, the complainer has no further say in what happens after that. So if the wife gets upset and calls the Police then later changes her mind, it doesn't matter, the Police will arrest you anyway and report you to prosecutors.

I don't think the general public are fully aware of this recent amendment to Scottish law which is one of the reasons for my post. I'm not saying bad partners should be let off, but I think a lot of 'ordinary' people could fall foul of this law for perhaps one off minor outbursts and end up in a lot of trouble, expensive legal proceedings and ultimately ruined relationships.

Originally posted by bigyin
Mental/emotional abuse includes: Threats (including threats of violence); criticism and name calling

Let us contribute to the overall pamperification of society to make it such that calling your partner the mean names (((((((((((((((((((((((((( and telling her that what she does is wrong/biased/stupid is abuse on par with things like threating to kill the kid and keeping tabs like a psychopathic, control-obsessed pastor does with his sheep

Yeah and don't forget about the unwritten part of the law that is equally absurd but unfortunately true in most cases. It's always the mans fault.

Wait does the law work both ways? What if the wife calls the husband an a$$h**e for forgetting an anniversary? What if she says he can't go to a strip club? What if he comes home covered in lipstick and smelling like a french whore and she accuses him? Can the wife be charged for all those things?

reply to post by Carreau


My guess is she'd actually be praised for being so strong and independent as to stick it to her husband
Woman power!

I'm just going to step in and say that I've had very close and recent experience of domestic abuse in my family in a way I never expected to see ever. I really welcome the recognition of the fact that abuse can be so many other things than physical. No system is perfect, and we shouldn't expect this one to be either, so lets just allow the system to do it's job...it must be allowed to work.

Non-physical abuse can be just as damaging, and it's impossible to watch someone you love very much be treated like crap by someone who thinks he can get away with it simply because they are married. Of course it works both ways...it goes without saying. We also have to give the vast majority of decent officers in the police force credit for how they behave. I've seen nothing but perfectly decent behaviour from them...and again, I know there will be exceptions..

It's progress...not perfect...but progress. It's right that this is recognised. Flame on...I don't much care.

Funny how ad hominem attacks fail miserably in an online forum, and yet people seem to think they work in real life arguments. The minute you sink to the level of ad hominem, you've lost the debate.

Why anyone would resort to name calling during an argument is beyond my comprehension.

If nothing else, it's infantile.

Ambiguous laws are very common.

In this case they could be used badly both ways, especially in divorce or family hearings.

Certainly poorly worded kind of stuff ,but I do agree that psychological abuse can really be about anything.

Now should you be responsible for the self esteem of everybody you interact with?

Probably not.

Kids or wife? Well kids at least till they move out, I mean you are raising them aren't you?

Otherwise prove it in court.

~Tenth

reply to post by tothetenthpower


Prove it in court I just found a good use for Google glasses both partners record everything said and done in a relationship so it can be proven in court haha

here is an idea instead of dealing with physical and emotional abuse and getting the police involved you can always leave the person ive always said if my spouse ever called the police on me for something non violent i would leave her because obviously my best interest are not at heart

I think this applies only when it is constant and long term, so not for common domestic disputes, otherwise most people would be domestic abusers by that definition, lol. The law seems badly worded as it is, it should be more specific.

In my opinion psychological abuse can be very real, but good luck proving it in court, it doesnt leave physical marks. And it is one of those areas of abuse that women commit as often as men. And its the kids who are the main victims.

Originally posted by PharaohSmiff
here is an idea instead of dealing with physical and emotional abuse and getting the police involved you can always leave the person ive always said if my spouse ever called the police on me for something non violent i would leave her because obviously my best interest are not at heart

I think that is what will happen more and more.

Not only that but I think guys will be more wary of getting involved with women now that the stakes are so high.

The level of trust required is getting greater and greater.

I don't know about everyone else, but I have been married to the same woman for 36 years and I would be lying if I said we did not throughout that time have major rows and shouting matches at certain times. We are both old skool types, there would be no question of phoning any police to sort the problems out. wasn't available then anyway. We dealt with it ourselves and learned how to overcome difficult times without beating each other up.

I showed this to my missus and she said that according to that I should be behind bars now. Mind you I could say the same back about her.

I think its a huge mistake to bring police into situations like this. If police are needed then the marriage is over. No point in continuing. You don't think the next argument the whole Police thing wont be thrown in the face of the other one. You dont think that the one taken away by police this time wont be looking for revenge.

No either sort it out between yourselves, or maybe ask relatives/parents to come and advise what to do.

There are some things that should be kept out of a public court. Mind you there are those who like to go on Jeremy Kyle/ Jerry Springer and air their dirty washing. To the audience they are just a joke, making a spectacle of themselves.