Damn, It's Good to Be a Man!!

Damn, It's Good to Be a Man!! and The strength of a man.

Can't have one without the other right?

We are MEN. We are Good, We are Not So Good. We do the right things as much as we do the Not So Right Things.

With credit to: www.bullyonline.org...

A great site bringing to the forefront the issue of Bullying and an attempt to address it. Using humor to bring people to the front and raising awareness.

Thank you to them.

Enjoy!


Damn, It's Good to Be a Man!!

Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be president. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station because this one's just too icky. Same work - more pay. Wrinkles add character.

Wedding Dress $5000; Tux rental $100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. Your pals never try to trap you with: "So, notice anything different?"

One mood, ALL the damn time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. Dry cleaners and hair stylists don't rob you blind. You can leave the motel bed unmade. You can kill your own food.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices. Everything on your face stays its original color.

You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You don't have to clean the apartment if the maid is coming.

You can quietly watch a game with a buddy for hours without thinking: "He must be mad at me." You don't mooch off other's desserts. You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.

You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You don't have to shave below your neck.

Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24th in 45 minutes.

Damn, it's good to be a man!

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It's all good and also humerous to look at the difference between the sexes. Seen so many here on ATS. But let's look at what it means to TRULY be a man.

The strength of a man

The strength of a man isn't seen in the width of his shoulders.
~~~~It's seen in the width of his arms that circle you.

The strength of a man isn't in the deep tone of his voice.
~~~~It's in the gentle words he whispers.

The strength of a man isn't how many buddies he has.
~~~~It's how good a buddy he is with his kids.

The strength of a man isn't in how respected he is at work.
~~~~It's in how respected he is at home.

The strength of a man isn't in how hard he hits.
~~~~It's in how tender he touches.

The strength of a man isn't in the hair on his chest.
~~~~It's in his Heart...that lies within his chest.

The strength of a man isn't how many women he's loved.
~~~~It's in how he can be true to one woman.

The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift.
~~~~It's in the burdens he can carry.

Stand tall, be kind, treat your mate and children with the love, respect and kindness they deserve in life. Not only for them but for you as well.

Be a REAL Man!

Peace

lol I love it. But I disagree with one point:

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

No man should ever choose to grow a mustache, unless it's connected to other facial hair.

Originally posted by Ghost375
lol I love it. But I disagree with one point:

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

No man should ever choose to grow a mustache, unless it's connected to other facial hair.

As most men know, it's just a tickler...

Peace

reply to post by jude11




right... perfect for 80s porn

but nothing else...

Originally posted by Akragon
reply to post by jude11

 

right... perfect for 80s porn

but nothing else...

Can we speak to Mrs AKRAGON?

Peace

Originally posted by jude11

Originally posted by Akragon
reply to post by jude11

 

right... perfect for 80s porn

but nothing else...

Can we speak to Mrs AKRAGON?

Peace

Nope... I shot her...



heres another thing to add to your list... Being a man, we have little problem walking away from a horrible marriage...

Maybe that's just me though

Originally posted by Akragon

Originally posted by jude11

Originally posted by Akragon
reply to post by jude11

 

right... perfect for 80s porn

but nothing else...

Can we speak to Mrs AKRAGON?

Peace

Nope... I shot her...

heres another thing to add to your list... Being a man, we have little problem walking away from a horrible marriage...

Maybe that's just me though

Nope, not just you.

Because we men have the secret of the perfect pancakes and women will never understand.

Peace

Not gonna lie...I'm jealous.
I've always longed to be able to go camping, and not worry about going to the bathroom and ruining an otherwise good pair of socks.
Also, guys don't have to shave body hair.

There are, however, some restrictions and limitations. I have a paper copy of 26 laws promulgated by the International Council of Man Laws. Many of them can't be posted here. Some of them are:

1) Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2) It is Ok for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
......(a) When a heroic dog dies to save it's master.
......(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
......(c) After wrecking your boss' car.
......(d) When she is using her teeth

3) Any man who brings a camera to a stag night may be legally killed and eaten by his friends.

4) If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever, unless you marry her.

7) In the car pool, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

8) When stumbling upon men watching a sporting event, you may ask the score, but never who's playing.

10) It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink, ONLY when you're sunning on a tropical beach, and it's delivered by a topless model, and ONLY when it's free.

13) Friends don't let friends wear speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

18) If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.

24) Thou shall not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange, or sky blue.

26) There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.

Originally posted by PutAQuarterIn
Not gonna lie...I'm jealous.
I've always longed to be able to go camping, and not worry about going to the bathroom and ruining an otherwise good pair of socks.

Also, guys don't have to shave body hair.

Not going to lie either...

I've known some women that stand when they...almost ruin their socks.

*shudder* Just not right I tells ya! Just not right....

Peace

reply to post by jude11

I must learn these ways. You don't know what's lurking on the ground, especially in the dark. Those parts are the last thing you want bitten by some wild animal you didn't even see. If you did get bitten by something you didn't see, you couldn't even comfortably show it to your fellow outdoor enthusiasts, to try and figure out what it was.

reply to post by charles1952


Could we replace Angelina with Kate Upton?

reply to post by Akragon

Dear Akragon,

Absolutely. The list is from an English (as opposed to American) language list. I'd far rather accept the opinion of ATSers on such a crucial subject.

On a not entirely unrelated topic, the British National Health Service just took about $7,000 from the taxpayers for a surgery. It was for a woman who complained that being extremely flat-chested caused her serious emotional problems. The government shipped in the cash required to get her to 36DD. She is now planning to model and make topless photos. Apparently her . . . ummmm . . . "ego" has been sufficiently inflated.

Two lessons learned; the British are trying to catch up, and Obama may have a new way to sell his health insurance program in the US.

With respect,
Charles1952