My Son

Also Smylee If he has a great imagination why not try roleplaying like D&D?
I helped my teacher pal come up for a kids D&D game and they loved it, it helped bring out the little ones confidence and fueled their imagination.
She did a weekly game and she was amazed how much help it gave the ones who are shy etc.

reply to post by smyleegrl

I think brainwave therapy would help him, where they use things like binaural beat and lights to stimulate left right hemispheric synchronization etc. Children with ADHD benefit enormously from this type of therapy. By stimulating the pineal gland it also causes the natural release of HGH and other beneficial hormones, endorphins and neurotransmitters, and it helps with the eye and vision, as well as to produce a calm and centered demeanor.

You can do it yourself by getting something called a "mind machine" which aids in this process, which is just a pair of glasses that flash lights according to a sound feed called audiostrobe and mix it with some gentle (because he's young) brainwave entrainment tracks (some of which include the audiostrobe).

One of the principal benefits of this type of therapy is that it fires up the endocrine system, with all these other benefits.

Getting into reading will also help as that's a "flow" experience with a focal point of awareness.

So you can help him grow, calm down, get better vision, and help build his brain all at the same time.

Nutrition and exercise would also play a big role in his transformation.

My heart goes out to you, and to your son and it's so obvious how much you love him.

Just offering what I can think of for whatever it's worth, but I've heard stories of children taking this kind of therapy with lights and sounds and it just works wonders and they enjoy it.

Best Regards,

NAM

Honestly, I skipped reading through all of the replies to post this info for you Smylee:

Give your little boy L-Arginine before bed. It is a safe amino acid and it is crucial for the development of HgH. Also, Melatonin is a good secretagogue of HgH. Study online as much as you can about these 2 and take that knowledge with you to the Dr. Then consult the Dr. for opinions on dosages, so it can be logged, etc.
Note: Because you can get these products OTC the Dr. may be against them because money from any of those purchases won't be seeing his pocket.

reply to post by smyleegrl


Hey, I can empathize. My son has some issues too, raising him by myself when he was younger was a nightmare despite how fiercely I love him... You are one hell of a strong woman and you will get through this and you will be able to do whatever is required of you to help him through this. The most important things to remember, in my opinion, is that it isn't your fault. It might help too, to let yourself be mad (out of his sight and earshot), your husband and yourself need to be able to vent to each other.

reply to post by smyleegrl


Hang in their girl! School can be so hard on our little ones.

Right now my little guy who is in kindergarten says that no one likes him. He hates school and thinks it's stupid and doesn't want to go. I don't know what to do. I was introverted to and school was difficult. The academic part, piece of cake - the social part, not so easy. He doesn't go into a rage to deal with his emotions, instead he will go upstairs and destroy something! For Christmas he had asked for one of those light up saber swords from Star Wars. When he got home from school he'd ripped it apart.

Our children are certainly a challenge! I've seen your postings around the site, and your such a light. A good person. Children are almost always a reflection of us, (and later peers, that's when it gets really hard) and I know he's in good hands.

Blessings,
Cirque

Like @kimish said taking L-Arginine can increase HGH. L-glutamine has also known to increase HGH. Use google scholar to look around at papers concerning the same. There are some good sellers on Ebay.
I would like to suggest a few things-
* Look at labels for everything. Ensure that you are not feeding him chemical dyes.
* Keep him away from GM as much as possible. Consider buying some heirloom seeds from Ebay, Amazon and plant a small garden.
* Juice once a day if possible. There are some heavy metal toxicity herbs out there that you can look at.
drhyman.com...
* Change out his water to RO water. Re-Mineralize the water with some real sea salt such as Celtic or Hawaiian sea salts.
* Reduce wheat, bean products if not eliminate them,. For rice use jasmine or basmati rice. There are plenty of other grains to eat.
* Consider some pro biotic drinks.

Please research everything possible. Good luck.

reply to post by CirqueDeTruth


Just a suggestion that may help a little.

Talk to him and ask him "Next time you are angry, please come to me and ask for a big long cuddle before you break something. If you still want to break something I will give you something to tear apart, but only after the cuddle."

If you are asked for a BIG cuddle, give him one, doesn't matter if dinner burns! Keep a pile of decent cardboard boxes around for him to tear up. Direct the anger at cardboard boxes teaches the first stages of anger control. Replacing anger with feelings of love is the ultimate goal. See the link I provided in my previous post. One of the books is 'Raising HSP children. Read it please, it is not as complete as it should be but it is a start.

If I can help further, let me know.

P

Best of luck to you and your son.
All of your love and concern will bring you closer together.

Sorry to hear the news.

Your child is unique. All kids are. Some more "unique" than others. Sort of like alot of us here on ATS?

My own child had much difficulties from birth. Slow to walk, talk, potty train. But smart as could be. Lousy in school but off the charts on abstract thinking. Funny, charming, a storyteller and comedian, but a nervous wreck giving a school book report. Labelled - ADHD, depressed, bipolar, anxiety, OCD, "bad", ODD, slow, gifted. You name it, I heard it. Just depended which neurologist, pyschiatrist, pyschologist, school counselor, doctor or alternative healer I went to with my kid.

Many $$ and much time and heartache later, no help. Meds never worked (never really wanted to go there anyway, but gave in and tried), "rewards" systems like in all the ADHD books - never worked. Ignoring bad behavior, outbursts, tantrums - didn't work. Neither did punishing, negative consequence programs, candid talking, hell even bribes.

Rages in young children is hard. Was lonely for me as the parent, because my child was the 8-year-old acting like she was three in public, and I got the disapproving looks and the "talks" with the school officials. But my little one also had great days, hours, moments. Brilliant moments. Calm, loving, fun, secure. Never lasted. But valued.

At one point, I considered it might be aspergers on the autism spectrum, especially during a patch of years when rages, self-doubt, difficulty with social skills with peers, and other signs seemed to come into play.

Today, a young adult. Still difficulties with anger, rage, but far less often. Still ADD symptoms - disorganized, has to be always busy, entertained, engaged in conversation, doing something, hard to concentrate. But, much less in intensity. Great social skills, well-liked, still very charming. Doesn't look like aspergers now.

All I can tell you is -- you have what you have. You love your son, and no matter what tranpires, make sure he feels it every day, despite sometimes ugly behaviors. Take him to specialists, but know that they all can counter one another til your head spins. Follow your motherly gut instincts after talking with specialists - especially before giving any medications. Try alternative, homeopathy, counseling, diet, exercise, alternative schools.

Sorry if I sound like I'm preaching. Don't mean to. Just know that answers and "fixes" may not be forthcoming, so be prepared to accept each day as it comes, learn everything you can about all angles of the situation, test and learn, and take care of you too. Stay strong!

reply to post by smyleegrl

smyleegrl, Everything will be ok in the long run, you will see. You are a very kind and loving and caring person. A child is lucky to have a mom like you. Love is always the answer no matter what is the question. Patience and love and caring will win out. If ever there was/is a person that can help and get through this, it is you. Your son will thrive under your care and concern and love. It may take time but it will happen. He sounds like a very intelligent lil fella with lots of good qualities that will eventually present postive outcomes.

What some have mentioned may be true, watch out relevant to foods and additives. There is such a thing as "food for the soul" and you have plenty of that to share with the lil guy. All will be well in time. Blessings and love and hugs to you and your lil one. ^j^

I was typing a long response, but somehow the page refreshed (with no input from me... can't stand when that happens) and I lost it all.

The nutshell version was: I'm the last person who could offer good parenting advice as I don't have a child and am screwed up enough for a room full of kids in all likelihood. But I have come to understand and respect that all parents are learning as they go. There is no such thing as a perfect parent or an expert parent. I have seen both the psychiatric and pharmaceutical route, and the alternative route succeed in raising healthy, wonderful children. As I'm sure your son is and will be.

At the end of the day, after considering all the options, alternatives, and possibilities, only you can make the decision as to what is best for your son. The only advice I feel confident in offering at all is something I'm certain you already do, which is to let him know he is loved and that none of this is his fault.

Beyond that all I can offer is empathy and best wishes. Peace.

Originally posted by smyleegrl
He cannot handle loud noises, crowds, chaos, etc. The OT put him on a "sensory diet" to limit the amount of stimulation he's exposed too, and he's made a lot of progress.

Keep that up. Sounds like you're doing a great job with him SG.

Keep focusing on his positive attributes and give him a lot of positive feedback. I'm sure you do already, I'm just saying.

reply to post by smyleegrl


My son went through a similar stage. Even to the eye. Later we found out that he is blind in that eye and the cause to his slow learning curve to his reading. (Which was an initiator to his bursts of anger as well)

The docs and teachers, at the time, want all sorts of pharmaceuticals perscribed.

We did none of that.

We played to his strengths, math. And actually gave him more work!

Love, constant care saw us through it and now he is a happy, smart, healthy 10 year old with a thirst for knowlwge and a wicked sense of humour.

My thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

Thanks again, everyone, for your kind words and well wishes.

Wanted to give a little more information to clarify a few things. Hope you don't mind, writing this helps me order things in my own thoughts.

Most of you know I'm a teacher with a passion for brain development and brain-based learning. I am currently working (very, very, very slowly) on my doctorate in this field with the eventual intention of working with children who have "issues" with learning.

That's one of the reasons I'm so frustrated with myself....how can I expect to help others when I can't help my son? that kind of thing.

Someone mentioned playing to his strengths. We do. He has a wonderful imagination and loves to make up stories. He also is obsessed with video games/movies and talks constantly about the games and movies he's going to make when he grows up. We bought him a child's video recorder and he uses it to make "movies" or record himself telling stories. He loves doing this. He also loves to tell me the plot of his latest game idea, and can spend hours talking about the games he wants to make (no joke, I once timed him out of curiosity and he spent two and a half hours talking about his game...nonstop). We encourage his interests for computers and the like. I remember when he was about three, I had him with me at a school meeting during summer break. One of the other teachers was trying to find something on the computer and my son told her, "Just google it!" I still get a kick out of that.

Something else my son is driven to do is "jumping"...his words. Basically, this is running from the couch to the recliner and diving head-first into the cushions. Back and forth, back and forth. The Occupational Therapist explained to us that he's getting sensory input from this, kinda like a big hug, and that it helps him relieve stress. So although its hard on the furniture and the walls, we let him do this....and he can "jump" for an hour or so at a time.

The eye patch, someone mentioned getting him special patches. We did. We found a place online that makes patches with any picture you want on it. We got him a pirate, Scooby Doo, R2D2, Spiderman, and a monster patch. He rotates through them, but the novelty has worn off and he doesn't like to wear them. Hopefully, when we visit his eye doctor next month, he'll tell us we can reduce the amount of time he wears it.

Thanks again for all the advice and words of encouragement. They are greatly appreciated.

As said by others I suspect autism is the key here, all of the issues are perfectly normal in the autism spectrum.

Autistic children are rebels by nature, noise triggers behaviour as does proximity to others in some cases, the not wanting of the eye patch is text box and are the rages.

As a former special needs teaching assistant and as the person who spotted my nephew was autistic at a very early age I think I'm pretty correct about your boy. Don't be down hearted if he is diagnosed with it, autistic children with the correct training can turn out just as fun and clever as other children and they are very loving to their mother normally although like other kids the mother is often the first person the child takes stuff out on.

Your first task if he is autistic is the toughest, boundaries, he must have clearly defined boundaries, this is both for you and him. Autistic children who are allowed to roam and do as they like because of rages or violent acts initially are ok but what is happening is the frustration of just doing as they like works like a magnifier and the antics become bigger and occasionally depending on the spectrum, more violent, biting, hitting, pinching are all very common place.

So boundaries help you and him, he gets to know when is too much and you get a more behaved child.

Just remember that if he is autistic its NOT your fault, you have not done something to him, with time love and patience he will be better than ever. My sister in law took the lazy approach and just bribed her son with sweets, let him do as he pleased which because he was severe and had learning difficulties his actions were more extreme, he would strip naked and run about, he was allowed to play with water taps and baths and he was never told off for biting and pinching.

That was ok when he was 6 or so but he's 13 now and still does all these things, she refuses to to teach him as that is "someone else's job" and she constantly uses carers to get rid of him for the day, the effect on him is terrible, he's unruly at school, refuses to sit down because he's allowed to roam as he pleases at home, he still strips off which at 13 is getting close to other authorities getting involved and the biting is now very severe because of his strength.

You are nothing like my in law from reading your post, you sound like a caring but concerned mother and that's far better than a lazy "me time" mother like my in law...

Take him to be checked by your Doctor, its not the end of the world if he is autistic, it does not mean he is going to be a mindless child, its just a case his brain works differently to yours and with proper help and care he will continue be that great child you wanted.

reply to post by smyleegrl


sent you a pm
but as always F+S

reply to post by smyleegrl


Oh I so feel for you honey! xoxox

I have a best friend whose son has Aspergers and my Nephew has Autism. Your son actually sounds as if he may have Aspergers.

I hate labels however if you are looking for one, your son has all the symptoms of my bests friends child who is now 5. He walks on his tip toes, loves to cuddle, loves to get in the laundry once its fresh out of the dryer and has outbursts, of course my nephew does too but he does not like to cuddle and is not good with communication. He does write beautiful poetry though.

All kids are special, unique and need special and unique raising and guidance. Have some patience, hang in there and by all means, let him know what behavior is acceptable and what is not.

I wish you and your family all the luck you can possibly have in the days and years to come. I have hope and faith it will all work itself out and get better.

reply to post by smyleegrl


Good and bad. In the larger, meta view.

On the smaller scale, for decades my friend was "diagnosed" (read "guessed at") by the best specialists with all sorts of ailments and prescribed all sorts of therapies and one day she happened to walk into an ENT (ear nose throat) specialist's lowly office, who took one look at her, felt her throat and suggested a thyroid problem and the cure. He was spot on.

I'm not suggesting a thyroid problem as I'm not qualified, I'm suggesting broadening the pool of information and people consulted until a productive answer is found.

Resources and time are a factor, I know, but a helpful answer might present itself if enough people are aware of the problem.

Best wishes.

Your son sounds a lot like this man when he was younger.

The greatest footballer on the planet, Lionel Messi:


Buy him a football (soccerball if you are American).

Originally posted by Myomistress
The rages are a sign of mental illness but not specifically a given symptom. Think of it this way, if you were forced to write with your less dominant hand, had a time limit, and if you were going to be judged violently for it, what would your range of emotions be? Panic? Disgust? Anger? Often children with "exceptionalities (I don't really like that term personally ) " undergo a cluster of these emotions because they're not on par with the norm and so get frustrated.

Yes! What he said. I was simply left-handed and kind of savante-like, so sure enough, from years 6 or 7 to about 9 or 10, I would fly into rages over the stupidest things, run through the house grabbing random things to throw, and knocking over random furniture. Also, punching holes in the wall, or kicking. I was taken to a shrink who diagnosed it as "Opposition to Authority Disorder" or whatever that is called, lol.

When I'd fly into a rage after that, my Stepdad would hold me in a curled up position in his arms so that I couldn't break free to go crazy. Then, when I hit puberty, IT ALL IRONED ITSELF OUT..

and now, i'm the most chill, laid back dude that I know!