I fear aging... (replies from older members appreciated)

I'm 27, and I've never given any real thought to my age. I just lived each day in my own world, distracting myself from the usual worries and whatnot. But these past three years have flown by unimaginably fast, and I've barely taken any memories from them.

I've never thought much of my looks, and didn't consider myself particularly beautiful or ugly. A week ago I began emailing a 21-year old man from a website we both frequent. He's pretty taken to me. We traded face photos of each other-- he's quite cute, and he told me the same about me. I wasn't displeased with the pictures I'd taken of myself, considering how non-photogenic I am, but later on I realized how much I'd changed in appearance from just 4 years ago. I don't know if it's just the mysterious personality change I went through over the past year showing through... or the smile lines at the sides of my mouth (at 27? Is that normal?).

Fear isn't exactly the right word to use. I'm not thrilled at the idea of my appearance changing, but at the same time I like the way people look when they're older. It makes them look more distinguished and adds character. I think it's a time thing, like I described before. You see, I feel really young on the inside. My soul is ten years out of date.
I'm physically six years older than this guy, and thanks to that I keep feeling like... a cougar, maybe. Ha, I don't know.

It's a spirit thing, I think.

Thanks if you read this far...

I'm 20 years older than you.
Things while be fine barring cancer,too much debt,life getting to you.

At 47,life is a peach.
I'm happy most of the time,and I don't worry about the little things.
We have two healthy ,polite and smart kids.
I didn't start a family till I was in my thirties.

Take it day by day,you will be fine.
Don't sweat the small stuff.

Peace,
K

I'm 46 and still feel like the same person I was when I was in my twenties. Age is a number and a state of mind and nothing more.

~Heff

reply to post by Hefficide


Yea,my wife constantly reminds me of my teenage tendencies.

I hear you so much. I"m going to be the dreaded 4-0 on March 31st. I look 25 or so, act that way. And the idea of being 4-0 is bothering me to no end. I keep thinking 'i only have 60 more years if I'm lucky, and though that's a long time, it's the end scale. I'll get worse every decade...."

So I decided to eat better, get more exercise, and realize age is nothing. It's just a number. I could be wheelchair bound at 65 or I can be running miles a day and be able to keep up with the kiddies at 65.

I'm lucky as I do not have greys at all, I have little to no medical issues aside from a major surgery coming up in 2 weeks to remove my baby oven..... other than that, I'm great condition.... well, I could do to get a little more exercise than I do now but hey. I'm doing it.

I haven't accomplished a lot in my life, but I have done everything that I've wanted to do.
Army. Indy pro wrestling. trained to be a jockey for horse racing. was in a black metal band. sang in a band. went to too many colleges for too many majors that never worked out. worked tons of different jobs. repossessed cars even. next summer I'm attending a 5 week intensive acting course at the prestigious American Academy of Dramatic Arts in LA where tons of Names in the business graduated from. Before that, I'm taking some acting/improv/theater classes close to home here.

That's just a tip of all the things I have tried and will try. Sure, I never 'made it to the end' with any of the prior things, but I can NEVER look back when I get older and say, "I wonder what if' or "If only I had". That is how my life has been amazing, filfulling and fun. Oh has it been fun. Anything I want to do, I do it. If I fail, oh well. I DID it anyway.

Live life like that. Go out and enjoy it. We all age, we all break, we all ultimately die. That's why we MUST MUST MUST live life like this is our last day ever. don't just wish. DO it. That is how we live. NO regrets.

reply to post by EllaMarina


Well ,,, You Can't Take life Too Seriously,
You'll Never Get Out of It Alive.

If your Lucky, You maybe will take Your grandchild fishing someday.
If so, tell them a beautiful story.

Blessings, W

P.S. Show them how to bait the hook

reply to post by sarra1833


Pretty and cool.
I see a great fortune for you.
Your future will be amazing.
In both this world and the next.

Stay Strong.

reply to post by EllaMarina

At 27 years old,I had divorced my first wife and was living it up on a coastal town close to the beach while in the mean time,my hair was escaping my head at an accelerating pace.
I managed to land a wife,a house and children.

You have the choice to make your life as you want it.You have the will.

I have a cousin who is 47. He has the sense of humour and optimistic attitude of a 20 year old. He still goes to punk shows, and he's an elementary school teacher

If that isn't proof that age is meaningless, I don't know what is

reply to post by EllaMarina


Dear EllaMarina,

I am old, I am in my 50s,I used to be a gymnast and almost broke a world record. I had a great body and amazing black hair. I am balding and grey where I am not, I have a tummy. As you age, so do the people that you would want to be with. Would you want to be with a 10 year old? I would not, Heck, I would not want to be with someone it their 20s or 30s, they might want to have children. As you age, so do the people that you want to be with. Don't worry about getting older, it is the best thing in the world, it means we have learned something. Peace.

The whole post seems to show an inner confusion. I think that should be fixed before worrying about the age thing.

reply to post by sarra1833


Dear sarra1833,

My but you have done so much. You are a fascinating young lady, I wish you well.I am so sorry to hear that you will have to remove parts of you, those are not the things that make you a lady. Gender is in the heart and you are a lovely young lady. The love of my life, is not the love of my life because she had breasts or a vagina, it was her soul, a soul that could love me (and that must have taken a lot, lol), After my wife left me, I dated a bit and I never had a woman ask me what I looked like naked, I really appreciated that, men worth knowing will not care about your body, they will care about you and you will care about them. Peace and best wishes young lady. Ageing is great, it means you worry about who the person is that you are with rather than about their body.

reply to post by EllaMarina

Try to have as much sex as humanly possible.

Im not kidding.

Plenty of Fish, Cougar Life, whatever.

If youre not in shape, get in shape. GET RIPPED.

Get off of ATS and go! You need to get busy

Originally posted by EllaMarina
I'm 27, and I've never given any real thought to my age. I just lived each day in my own world, distracting myself from the usual worries and whatnot. But these past three years have flown by unimaginably fast, and I've barely taken any memories from them.

I've never thought much of my looks, and didn't consider myself particularly beautiful or ugly. A week ago I began emailing a 21-year old man from a website we both frequent. He's pretty taken to me. We traded face photos of each other-- he's quite cute, and he told me the same about me. I wasn't displeased with the pictures I'd taken of myself, considering how non-photogenic I am, but later on I realized how much I'd changed in appearance from just 4 years ago. I don't know if it's just the mysterious personality change I went through over the past year showing through... or the smile lines at the sides of my mouth (at 27? Is that normal?).

Fear isn't exactly the right word to use. I'm not thrilled at the idea of my appearance changing, but at the same time I like the way people look when they're older. It makes them look more distinguished and adds character. I think it's a time thing, like I described before. You see, I feel really young on the inside. My soul is ten years out of date.
I'm physically six years older than this guy, and thanks to that I keep feeling like... a cougar, maybe. Ha, I don't know.

It's a spirit thing, I think.

Thanks if you read this far...

edit on 24-3-2013 by EllaMarina because: (no reason given)

I am 45 and I can tell you this. Life will be a great or as terrible as you decide to make it as you walk your path. You will be as beautiful or as ugly as you decide to make yourself with your thoughts, your actions, your life style. Decisions you make today will become their own self fulfilling prophecies.

In love and peace.

Originally posted by gladtobehere

Try to have as much sex as humanly possible.

Im not kidding. Plenty of Fish, Cougar Life, whatever.

That is terrible advice. Being promiscuous isn't usually a recipe for happiness for 27 year old women.

To the OP:- If you settle down with a man who is older than you and have some children, then you will feel less worried about getting older.

Having children makes people feel less bothered about getting older. I suppose it's a mother nature thing.

Being healthy is key I think, stay active.
I just turned 30, I have a bunch of young people who work for me 19-22yr olds. I can run them into the dirt.
Stay fit and you'll last a good long time, in fact people our age will likely live to be 200 - 300 yrs old with the way medical technology is progressing.

"Amor est vitae essentia"

I know that love is healthy, love makes one forever young at heart. As stated above, "Love is the essence of life."
It seems like the more love you spread the younger you feel. After my injury I felt like a 85 year old man, I am 44 and when I let go of the hate it changed me forever.

Oh my God, I'm going to be 55 in April. I can't tell you how quickly the years have gone by and how much has happened both good and bad.

I always said when I get old I'd age gracefully and not color my hair and worry about anything. LOL What the hell was I thinking? I color my hair and I worry all the time.

There have been so many changes physically, emotionlly...Best to have a sense of humor and some great friends.

No one can predict what there life will be like when they get older. There are too many variables. I wish you a good life and a long one at that!

Wow, I am 27 as well (male) and I fear aging - it isn't about looks for me at all, as a matter of fact, with my oily skin and low amount of balding genes, I am probably going to look better the older I get -

But I'm still pretty worried about getting older and becoming a closed-minded, boring man. For a guy my age, there is a lot of adjusting to be done right around now, so I have to figure out how to do it in a healthy and balanced manner (I do have to improve my work, finances, etc. but I still want to maintain an active lifestyle and social life).

Congratulations on the guy lol good luck

reply to post by Night Star


Thanks, NightStar! Also AQuestion is right, you have the chance to become an amazing person regardless of your looks, and a lot of people will admire you for that.