posted on Nov, 3 2004 @ 08:05 AM
I once felt your pain.
early in my relationship, I felt the exact same things that you are right now. You described my relationship with my G/F exactly... however as it
turned out, she wasn't cheating.
She bowled on a womens Tue night league, would stay after words for drinks and girl talk, sometimes dressing a little nicer than usual. Girls night
out would come around a little more often, 2-3 times a month etc.
No hang ups on the phone though.
I started feeling the distance growing between us.
I did what had to be done, I sat her down and told her what I was feeling. I didn't acuse her of cheating. I simply asked where we were at in our
I asked her if she thought she would like to see other people.
I made sure that she was aware that I didn't want to.
a little back ground ... we were both divorced recently at this time. SHe had been with her ex for 7 years, married for only 1 year. I had been
with my ex for 7 years, married for 6 of them....
I was the first guy she had seen since her divorce. I have to admit, I did come on a bit strongly, I had fallen for her immediately and didn't want
her to get away.
So, we sat and talked it through... she assured me that there was no one else and that she didn't want to see other people, however, at this
point, we had been living together for about a year, so we decided a few days break would do us good, lets see how we do.
I went home to KY for 3-4 days, we would call each other at bedtime every night, just to make sure each was safe. When I came home, we talked
again... everything was okay.
She understood my concerns about her and her actions, as it turned out, she was dressing differently because she was getting "bored" with herself
and wanted to look her best, always, still does as a matter of fact.
The time with the girls, turned out two of her close friends were losing thier relationships, one was married one not... and they were just needing
Jen to be there for them.
So I was lucky. I didn't "trail" her, check up on her phone calls etc. It turned out nice.... we're still together, as a matter of fact in
Jan it will be 7 years together.
So Alien, after all my rambling... just communicate with her, be honest with her and what you are feeling.