The rivers drying up must just be a natural coincidence as I have it from a very reliable source that Satan has been dealt with for a few generations
A mermaid that I have known for ages was talking to her cousin the unicorn & he related a story from a cute little reindeer he runs with.
Apparently since Satan has made so many people bad for so long Santas coal bill is through the roof.
Now back in the day this wasn't a problem but now with China buying up all the coal they can get, Santa's in a bind.
His bill is so bad he can't afford nog for the elves & there have been rumors of a general strike.
So he offered the Christmas chocolate concession to the Easter Bunny if he could work some magic.
Now Bunny being the crafty trickster that he is came up with a plan.
Satan is all about the pleasures of the flesh so he's a sucker for chocolate, Bunny let it slip to a lower demon where he had a generations worth of
the brown gold stashed in a cave.
Satan being the greedy (blank blank) that he is went after it with all his minions.
Well what Satan didn't know was Bunny had the stash charmed by this herb cooking leprechaun that has no equal when it comes to potions & such.
After Satan & his hoard gorged on the chocolate they passed out, then Santa with the help of all of Rudolph's offspring blocked that cave with a
boulder so big God himself would have a hard time lifting it.
So long story short Satan is tied up awhile digging himself out of that cave so you humans can stop stressing about the End of Days for a few hundred
years give or take.
It's a damn big rock.
edit on 19-3-2013 by aethertek because: Spelling