posted on Mar, 18 2013 @ 12:40 PM
There is no simple solution or easy fix here. Sounds harsh, but it's the truth.
You can't make someone who doesn't want to quit drugs or alcohol quit against their will. That's something only the addict can decide for themselves.
The best you can do is try to convince them, but don't run yourself down trying either.
You can try to explain this to your parents, but again, it's up to them to ultimately make that change themselves. All you can do past helping
convince them there needs to be a change, is help them manage ways to do that if they decide too. Just because they should listen to you doesn't meant
they will, and that sucks but it happens sometimes. Sounds like they might be more reasonable about the matter than your brother. I'm sure they don't
approve of his shenanigans, but don't know how to give him tough love by letting them hit rock bottom. It comes from a good place but with a bad
outcome. Despite the fact it's a religious saying "good intentions pave the road to hell" fits here well.
I know you're trying to help them, so in turn your life improves, but these are their choices (albeit bad ones) and sometimes we can't change others
choices, even when it effects yours. You can help by trying to bring them to this conclusion, but if you beat that drum too loud and too often, they
will just stop listening, and it will actually hurt your cause. Lecture in moderation, and don't get derogatory or holier-than-thou, no put downs; or
they will stop listening.
The most effective thing you can do, is just doing what's best for you
, despite the obstacles they create. Just think, every obstacle caused by
them that you have to overcome will make you stronger in life. (at least the ones you can't avoid)
I take it you are young enough to live at home, if so living in the same home with this is only temporary anyway. Rise above, then lead by example.
Sounds like you have good personal boundaries for life, but realize that doesn't come to everyone so easily. It's not easy to quit either drugs or bad
habits (even bad parenting habits) even when you're actively making that effort. IF they do hear you out, it's a long hard road ahead.
18-3-2013 by PutAQuarterIn because: (no reason given)