posted on Mar, 6 2013 @ 07:18 AM
I don't think anyone in the world has come up with a good way to actually stop bullying. Except for teaching your children to be good respectful
people, every possible fix could backfire.
To share an example many times harassment and physical altercations are a two way street. Some kids don't get along, and they fight with each other,
just like adults do. I don't think these type of situations need to be dealt with harshly at all.
Do you think it's a coincidence that school shootings would have been unimaginable in the past? Even though kids had more access to guns back then
than they do now. They were allowed to bring guns to school, and schools had shooting clubs. Obviously the gun's aren't the cause of school
shootings, the behavior of children is.
In the past if two kids had a problem, and got a fist fight, they might get a slap on the wrist. Now there is this "zero tolerance" BS. You can't
get in a fist fight or else you get suspended or some other ridiculously extreme punishment. So instead of these kids working out their differences in
a fist fight, the kids hold it in. For years they take all the abuse and hold in their feelings. Until they snap, and kill as many people as
I honestly feel that's why there are school shootings, they refuse to allow boys to be boys. Me and everyone I knew when I was a kid would wrestle,
box, get in fights, it was an excellent way to relieve the pressure and stress of being a kid, and to get that one guy to leave you the heck alone.
But the school doesn't allow this, they make you seem like you are an evil monster if you get in a fight.
Not having a pressure valve for that stress causes it to build up until it explodes, and when it explodes kids die. Would you rather have kids getting
in fights or shooting up schools?
I bring this up, because it's relevant to the subject of how to deal with bullies. Not everyone who makes fun of someone, or beats someone up is a
bully. Sometimes a kid gets beaten up because he is a jackarse. Sometimes kids get harassed because they are acting like a-holes and their fellow
students are sick of it.
Say john smith is getting harassed by a few fellow students, gets sick of it, and punches one in the face. Is that the best way to deal with the
situation? Not really... but I bet those kids leave him alone. And the kid also got to feel good about standing up to a bully, he no longer feels like
a victim who gets chit on all the time. He'd probably be less likely to explode and shoot up a school years down the line.
Say the school sees john smith punch the other kid, and then john smith gets in trouble. Now he feels that not only are his fellow students against
him, but the school is against him too. He gets harassed, and then gets in trouble when he stands up to his harassers. He's unlikely to stand up for
himself anymore, knowing he'll get in trouble, so he continues to get abused.
Real bullies are usually pretty good at hiding their abuse of others. Just curious, with the OP's story how do we know the poor child that passed
away wasn't actually a bully to the other guy, and the other guy got sick of it?
I was always bigger and stronger than my peers when I was in school. But I was tormented by kids half my size in elementary school. When I got to
middle school it got to be too much to take, and I asked my parents to be home schooled to avoid the bullies. They had no idea that I was being
tormented so, because I never said anything. They asked why I didn't stand up for myself, and I said because we aren't supposed to fight or argue,
basically because the school trains kids at a young age to be unprincipled pushovers.
My parents told me that if I got in trouble for defending myself they would support me 100%. Guess what? I went on a crusade of kicking wholesale ass
for the rest of the school year. I was suspended several times, and my parents would take me out for ice cream and hamburgers, or go-carts, or some
other fun activity when I was suspended. They knew what was going on, they refused to put up with the school's BS. I was being tormented, I stood up
for myself, and I won. I was never bullied again at that school, and because of how my attitude changed I was never bullied in high school either.
This changed who I was to become as a person. If it wasn' t for that experience, it's likely I would have grown up to be a pushover who lets people
take advantage him and abuse him.
It's incredibly tragic that this child lost his life, it's a freak accident and I'm sure the perpetrator feels horrible and did not intent to kill
the poor kid. I mean really, who attempts to kill someone by punching them in the face? Aside from professional fighters who would even think they
were capable of killing someone by sucker punching them in the face.
The kid should totally be punished, but not in a way that's going to ruin the rest of his life. We don't know who really bullies who, and there's
no point in destroying two lives.