A Must Watch: High school basketball player passes ball to mentally challenged player on other team

reply to post by Tardacus



we're talking about one game in one highschool that didnt matter or determine some sort of championship. this was not a sacrifice. it was a kind gesture and nothing more. i don't know the level of this kids intelligence but he's not going on to play NCAA ball and i would guess this isn't going to ruin his life.

no one dumbed anything down here. this doesnt fit as an example to what your saying and we really aren't even talking about the "lowering of the bar" in this thread.

I am against honorable mentions and sudden victory that we see in sports nowadays. However, i don't see dumbing down in this video. The boy didn't play in every game. The good atheletes did. He played in one game for less than 2 minutes. It's my assumption that this moment will be one of the most memborable moments of his life, nothing dumbed down about that.

Doubt the kid found any of it insulting, he wouldn't of been so happy during it all if that were true. Perhaps he is challenged enough to not have the ability to see the negative sides of getting a ball passed to you from the other team. Maybe he just saw a really nice person who wanted to help him, so he took it, and made the shot without second thought.

Just never know.

Originally posted by smithjustinb
reply to post by kthxbai

 

I definitely am serious.

Like I said. The intentions might have been benevolent, and the subject may have been pleased, but that doesn't make it any less insulting. The bottom line for me is, despite the emotional context of that moment, is that dude was put on a pity pedestal. Especially by the guy from the other team.

Well, you're free to feel that way, but I disagree with you very much. The people involved on both teams and the people watching the game also disagree with you. 99% of the people watching the video disagree with you.

It's your prerogative to feel that way, but it doesn't make you correct, that's only your personal opinion on it and we all have opinions.

reply to post by kthxbai


I had to reply to these posts. I will state now - very clearly - I respect every individual and their right to an opinion. I am joining in as a reaction to what I have just read.

The young man who is at the heart of this thread - has parents - his mother was delighted. If there was even one iota of pity in any aspect of the school life and participation of her son - I imagine she would be the first person to demand the cessation of pity. The fact his mother is happy means she knows the intention of every action toward her son has been from the heart and with utmost respect. Her happiness is also rooted in the fact she has knowledge of all her sons schooling - not just the single game of basketball featured within the topic being discussed.

Whatever people think about the actions of all those invloved in the video - there was a time on this planet when Special Needs Children were locked away and treated with shame - let's not go backwards. While there is a lot of work to be done on this planet with regard to how we nurture and protect our Children - there was no abuse in this story - only kindness - inclusion - sense of belonging and a lot of happy screaming people at the end who didn't seem too interested in who had won the basketball game. Nathan won - surely everyone can see that!

Much Peace...

reply to post by kthxbai


It's not an opinion. You can't deny that their actions were motivated by pity. Sure they showed love, but out of pity.

Originally posted by Amanda5
reply to post by kthxbai

 

I had to reply to these posts. I will state now - very clearly - I respect every individual and their right to an opinion. I am joining in as a reaction to what I have just read.

The young man who is at the heart of this thread - has parents - his mother was delighted. If there was even one iota of pity in any aspect of the school life and participation of her son - I imagine she would be the first person to demand the cessation of pity. The fact his mother is happy means she knows the intention of every action toward her son has been from the heart and with utmost respect. Her happiness is also rooted in the fact she has knowledge of all her sons schooling - not just the single game of basketball featured within the topic being discussed.

Whatever people think about the actions of all those invloved in the video - there was a time on this planet when Special Needs Children were locked away and treated with shame - let's not go backwards. While there is a lot of work to be done on this planet with regard to how we nurture and protect our Children - there was no abuse in this story - only kindness - inclusion - sense of belonging and a lot of happy screaming people at the end who didn't seem too interested in who had won the basketball game. Nathan won - surely everyone can see that!

Much Peace...

edit on 27-2-2013 by Amanda5 because: Grammar

I agree completely! She knows the intentions were to give him a great moment in time that he would forever cherish

Originally posted by smithjustinb
reply to post by kthxbai

 

It's not an opinion. You can't deny that their actions were motivated by pity. Sure they showed love, but out of pity.

It that nessacarily a bad thing though? Sure they did what they did because they were sympathetic. It is the same as donating to a charity or helping a old lady carry groceries to her car. Those actions can arguably be initiated with pity. I don't see any harm though. I only see sympathy and love for others.

Originally posted by digitalbluco
Doubt the kid found any of it insulting, he wouldn't of been so happy during it all if that were true. Perhaps he is challenged enough to not have the ability to see the negative ve sides of getting a ball passed to you from the other team. Maybe he just saw a really nice person who wanted to help him, so he took it, and made the shot without second thought.

Just never know.

Some people do not know when they're being insulted. It's like when people in prison or jail disrespect a new inmate, and the new guy thinks they're just joking with him. So the new guy smiles and laughs it off. The inmates were testing the new guy's courage and self respect, and he failed. The inmates knew they were insulting him, and the new guy was oblivious. The new guy was overwhelmed with the drama that he became blind to what was behind the curtain.

This basketball game is sort of like that. The difference being, neither side knew their actions were an insult in disguise. Some people just don't know an insult when they see one. And some people are sometimes unaware they are being insulting. Hell I've been guilty of both. And in this case, so was everyone in that video. And so are some of you.

reply to post by smithjustinb


It's only insulting if someone involved views it as an insult. Nobody involved saw it that way, so it wasn't insulting.

"Pity" isn't always a negative. Sometimes it's positive, when that's the case, it's called compassion. Compassion is a good thing.

I promise, if I'm ever playing against you in a basketball game, I won't ever pass the ball to you and insult you in such a manner. As for the kids in the video, they showed great compassion and empathy and I applaud them.

Originally posted by headorheart

Originally posted by smithjustinb
reply to post by kthxbai

 

It's not an opinion. You can't deny that their actions were motivated by pity. Sure they showed love, but out of pity.

It that nessacarily a bad thing though? Sure they did what they did because they were sympathetic. It is the same as donating to a charity or helping a old lady carry groceries to her car. Those actions can arguably be initiated with pity. I don't see any harm though. I only see sympathy and love for others.

It is to me. I know I don't want to be pitied. Unless I'm old, carrying groceries to my car, and they all start falling out of my hand because they're too heavy or something, I don't want help. I don't want people trying to be nice to help me just because I'm old. Even though they think they are doing a good deed, no. They're calling me old, except unlike the kid in the video, I see it. And it's insulting.

It would have been a good deed, probably, just to let the kid play. And then go about the normal routine with him a part of the team, actually doing what basketball players do- try to win. But they singled him out and put him on a pedestal. He didn't get to play basketball that day. He got to play everybody treat me different because I'm not as smart as you.

Originally posted by kthxbai
reply to post by smithjustinb

 

It's only insulting if someone involved views it as an insult. Nobody involved saw it that way, so it wasn't insulting.

As a remote audience member, I'm involved and I see it that way, so yeah, it is.

And if a tree falls in the woods, it DOES make a sound.

Originally posted by kthxbai
reply to post by smithjustinb

 

It's only insulting if someone involved views it as an insult. Nobody involved saw it that way, so it wasn't insulting.

As a remote audience member, I'm involved and I see it that way, so yeah, it is.

And if a tree falls in the woods, it DOES make a sound.

Originally posted by smithjustinb


It is to me. I know I don't want to be pitied. Unless I'm old, carrying groceries to my car, and they all start falling out of my hand because they're too heavy or something, I don't want help. I don't want people trying to be nice to help me just because I'm old. Even though they think they are doing a good deed, no. They're calling me old, except unlike the kid in the video, I see it. And it's insulting.

It would have been a good deed, probably, just to let the kid play. And then go about the normal routine with him a part of the team, actually doing what basketball players do- try to win. But they singled him out and put him on a pedestal. He didn't get to play basketball that day. He got to play everybody treat me different because I'm not as smart as you.

What you don't seem to be understanding is that in this thread, right now, due to your actions, I'm feeling pity for you. This isn't because you merely have a lower intelligence, merely because you may be from a challenged background, merely because you don't have comprehension or experience but because of the way you are reacting, by your own choice.

Instead of lashing out at you, calling you names, arguing and nitpicking, I'm taking the time to explain why these emotions are present in me and others due to your actions. This is done out of pity/compassion. I feel sorry for you and I am taking my time and effort to explain why. I'm not "in awe" of what you are saying or even feel "oh yeah, that guy has a point". No, I'm seeing it as someone who was probably hurt during their lifetime and is lashing out at others who are getting some kind of support because you didn't get it and you feel jealousy and anger because of it. Those are the reactions that are being produced here.

If I were to type out a bunch of name calling, attacks, hatefulness, etc, then that would be very insulting to you and I would be doing it out of anger. However, I'm explaining the feelings created due to compassion, which is different from "insulting pity". If I wished to be insulting to you, I'd be calling you names, laughing at you, pointing out all the issues in what you say, pulling in details to make you feel small and incompetent.

What they did at the game wasn't done for the purpose of laughing at him or making him feel "stupid", it was done to give him an amount of happiness, to bring a smile to his face, to create a memory that can't be taken away. The intention is EVERYTHING. They did it with love in their hearts, kindness in their actions and for "the greater good". They didn't do what they did so they could laugh at him and make jokes and belittle him. That is the key. .

I'm sorry that you have had so much pain in your life that you would see this event as insulting. I'm sorry that people have bullied or abused you so much that you cannot be trusting of others or joyful for the compassion that people can display to others. However, you are an adult now and this is something you will need to address in yourself either on your own or with the help of someone in a professional sense if you want to change it. When you are able to let go of this hatred and self-hatred, it will make a big difference in your quality of life and I hope you come to the point that you are able to do that.

reply to post by kthxbai


Wow.

Now it is much more apparent why you would have a hard time recognizing insults. I bet you don't think you insulted me in your last post huh. And your post was full of assumptions about me.

reply to post by kthxbai


Again. I know what their intentions were. Good intentions. Intentions aren't everything.

I learned my lesson back when I was being extraordinarily kind to people out of the goodness of my heart. I felt so giving that I walked up to a stranger and tried to hand him a dollar. Just to be nice. For no other reason. Never do that. I didn't understand at the time why he wouldn't take it. After all, my intentions were good. I felt embarrassed. I thought he was a jerk. I learned something though. Insults can be cryptic and subliminal. But they're there and some people see them and just because you can't, doesn't mean it's not there.

You really think I want or even need pity because I can see insults behind some good intentions? You assume that my life is a mess. It's not. I have love. I have respect. And I am fair and just. And everyone deserves to be treated equally. I am so behind that belief and that mindset that I extend it to include equality of humans to other animals. I'd treat my kids like I'd treat my dog, and that's not a bad thing. It's highly respectful and highly considerate and highly appreciative. I empower people by believing that they are just as capable to handle a situation as any other, and if they turn out not to be, at least I give them a fair chance.

Your pity is not needed. If you don't believe me, then maybe you lack compassion and maybe you're the distrustful one. Or maybe your ego is to big to see that you're at fault here. I am not to be pitied. And it is most definitely insulting that you think I should be and ironically, it lacks compassion.

Perhaps, perhaps not...

My pity for you continues and I hope you are able to overcome the issues that you face.

My admiration goes to the opposing team member who helped to make the moment a great one for the other kid who had a great love for basketball and made a memory that can never be taken away.

Originally posted by kthxbai
Perhaps, perhaps not...

My pity for you continues and I hope you are able to overcome the issues that you face.

My admiration goes to the opposing team member who helped to make the moment a great one for the other kid who had a great love for basketball and made a memory that can never be taken away.

edit on 2-3-2013 by kthxbai because: (no reason given)

I'm telling you I don't want or need pity. Yet you're not respecting that. So how are you authorized to have a conversation about the fundamentals of respect if you do not practice it?

Originally posted by smithjustinb

I'm telling you I don't want or need pity. Yet you're not respecting that. So how are you authorized to have a conversation about the fundamentals of respect if you do not practice it?

Wanting it or not wanting it does not prevent it from existing or being extolled.

Just as the compassion was extolled at the basketball game, the pity is extolled here.

Go in peace with what is extolled upon you.

reply to post by smithjustinb


The only people for whom I feel pity - are - those who think they know it all. Those who think that they are above others.

In the video I saw Children who put themselves where Nathan was - and - they threw him the ball so he would not miss out - in essence he got a turn with the ball. The Children did not put themselves above Nathan - they put themselves at his level and by doing so - they showed compassion - love - a sense of belonging.

If - as you suggest the actions of the Children stemmed from pity they perhaps would have walked over and handed him the ball - they would not have thrown it to him - by throwing it to him he was given the chance to catch it and then throw it by himself.

Pity is for the pitiful not the powerful. the able bodied Children in the video being discussed give me hope and I am sure Nathans Mother is now filled with hope that her son will find his way in life because she knows there are schools who are nurturing Children to be decent.

Pity - I saw no pity in the video. You - I am beginning to pity you because you don't seem to be able to see what the rest of us see - hope.

Much Peace...