posted on Feb, 26 2013 @ 02:09 PM
Water Ban to Take Effect
Washington DC, I.M.Whett Reporting., Today the Obama administration acting on the recommendations of the Department of Homeland Security's
report dated January 16 2013, has decided that effective immediately, the deadly substance known as "water" (scientific name: H2O) is hereby banned
from ownership or usage in the United States of America. Citing what he claims are "nefarious uses of the clear and tasteless substance" Obama
signed this latest executive order into action at approximately 9AM this morning.
The Executive Order lists the four main reasons for President Obama signing this groundbreaking edict:
1)100% of all Serial Killers, Rapists and Drug Dealers, use Water.
2)Water is a constant part of Herbicides and Pesticides that could be used for bomb making.
3)Water is the leading cause of Drowning Deaths in the United States
4)100% of everyone who uses Water, will die.
From this point forward, all former water taps in America will pump out Capri Sun. it is hoped that this drastic step will curb death and spurn any
would be terrorists.
Updated.. 26 Feb 2013