Interesting thread... got big quick, too! Just have to throw my hat in the ring here and join in with the "me too" chorus. From as far back as I can
remember I just had this odd feeling that the world was wrong somehow.. or something was off. Sitting in a tree once, guess I was about 11 or 12.. I
was staring at the blue sky, white clouds and 'charged' air (where I watched the tiny particles dancing) and I suddenly grew tense, waiting for a
rip to appear in the air that would shimmer and shine, then open to reveal the real world on the other side of that sky. Of course it didn't happen
but the feeling I had was the same one I had been having all along, that something wasn't right and the 'real' right world was going to suddenly
appear one day and everything would go back to the way it was supposed to be.
As I got older of course, I edited my thinking more to compliment the thinking of others and learned to keep my weird thoughts to myself. Still, as an
adult and for the past decades (I am 50 now, married forever, 2 grown kids, 1 grandchild, life is fine most of the time
I kept an eye on world
events, my ears perking up every time some strange news story popped up or a sudden insight about the cosmos appeared on tv... part of me wondering is
this a clue.. is this it.. the thing that is going to reveal the truth about our world?
Still waiting for that... or whatever it is that haunts me.. just this deep knowing that things are wrong somehow and I don't remember how or why I
know this. All my life I have been so confused by the ability of people to just meander along and live life without much thought, wondering why can't
they see that everything is so backward? Why do they all ignore the elephant in the room, which is - NOBODY KNOWS WHAT IS GOING ON !!! Who are we,
why are we here, who put us here, etc. and what is it all about.
There are some very strange things in this world.. odd events that happen that cannot be explained away easily. Anyone who has come into contact with
an otherworldly or beyond-human entity knows beyond any doubt that there is more to this reality than what is collectively agreed upon.
At this point, I focus my attention inward, believing this to be the key to everything. Phillip K Dick said it clearly: "The universe cannot be asked
to remove its mask if the person will not shed his. All the mystery religions, the Hermetic and alchemical and Christian included, hold the individual
human as target by which to transmute the universe. By changing the person the world is changed." and I agree with this assessment. It's a strange
and funny journey, isn't it.
So I am still waiting like many of you here... nice to know I am not waiting alone!
(Phillip K Dick source: Cosmogony and Cosmology)