reply to post by heineken
LOL .. What a load of rubbish! This just shows that you haven't taken into consideration human conditioning. What you propose as 'how I should react',
and my priorities, as disproving my claims, actually serves to validate them if you look at them in the correct context.
For example, although it's exciting the first time you visit an amusement park. I am sure you'd agree, that if you then returned to that same
amusement park every day for the next 8 months, that it would very quickly cease to be so exciting and quickly become routine and bland.
I have been dealing with this on a daily basis for over 8 months. Had I decided to post on this forum back then, I am 100% certain that my priorities
and thinking would have been vastly different. I went through a major array of emotional extremes throughout the course of my experiences.
Firstly ecstatic exitement, where in my stupidity I told a multitude of people who all now think I am crazy (except those who were willing to come
down and experience it themselves) This turned to apprehensive skepticism and quest for scientific reasoning,
Exhausting all other possibilities for what I was experiencing, combined with a reception of disbelief, ridicule, and fear (my girlfriend who saw them
the first time with me, broke up with me cause she was scared #less of my continued contact with them) from those in my life, I went through a stage
where at many times I struggled to deal with everything that was happening to me and the realisation that by participating in it I was alienating
myself from everyone around me, this manifested into major depression.
DURING this stage it was through the grace of reasoning by those I was communicating with that I WAS able to deal with what was happening. They
expressed 'concern' with the fact I was not dealing with the results of continued communication with them after I unintentionally ended up in hospital
as the result of a 'Hangover' style weekend. As such they voiced this concern and suggested to me every time I went down to see them, that I should
stop coming down for my own health. One of these times I asked them; if they held the opinion I shouldn't come any more; why they continued to appear
to me; to which they answered that if they didn't the results could prove even more detrimental for me.
This is one of many reasons that I fail to believe that they seek to harm or deceive me for the majority.
The stage that followed was my acceptance of what was happening for what it is. With which I am once again happy. I have been working with them to
gain an understanding of the complexities of the nature of the universe and our existence which; is slowly; serving to give me the understanding I so
impatiently sought which manifested my depression. My experiences are now completely positive in nature as I accept what they are graciously,
gradually teaching me and I gain a deeper understanding of everything.
Therefore. I say to you respectfully; I honestly do not care in the slightest if you believe me. I gave up caring about things like this long ago. I
don't even care if you read this post really. Now I just am just selectively distributing my information with those who may want to hear it in a way
that cannot pose harm to my personal life and remain content in the fact that I am not crazy, I know what is happening to me, and with time I will
understand it completely.
edit on 7-3-2013 by BornOfSin because: Spelling