I dumped my boyfriend last night.

orangetom1999

jheated5
reply to post by orangetom1999

 

Jheated5,

Wow!! You caught me by surprise there with this post and reply. I most certainly did not expect this nor from you but instead flack from Miss Sky.

I've run into a number of very controlling women in my lifetime. I am glad to have learned from this.

I highly recommend reading Warren Farrells books or videos. I have both here but the videos are readily accessable to those with computers. Very good stuff to teach a young man to survive the mine field of relationships.

Best you learn while you are still young for many do not.

Also..as I gave this advice to another person just now...once you learn and it sinks in to your soul..you will go around armed and not ignorant. Teach other young men how to survive this mine field...for so many are floundering in ignorance out here and these women are running over them in their ignorance.

Glad to hear you have seen it for what it is. Remember and keep up the learning. For the learning never stops.

Thanks for getting back to me on this,
I was quite surprised,
Orangetom

Yes I'm definitely going to have to check that out online, as soon as I call it quits and said I want no more to do with them, guess who wants me back??? You guessed it right! lol... I have a feeling it's going to be a never ending cycle, so after I'm done listening to the Warren Farrell video, hopefully I'll be able to break the cycle and keep on learning like you said.... Never hurts to gain more knowledge!

reply to post by jheated5


Wow!! Jheated5,

Interesting response from her. No problem. I calculated from the beginning that this woman was more interested in having a relatonship..sort of like a new bangle on the bracelet...than she was interested in the man to which she was attending.

But on another note. Your post surprised me.

I am also surprised by the response to another posting I made here on ATS in the
relationship board and want to share it with you as there are similarities between the two postings.
Like this thread involving you and Miss Sky there are several posts on the page I am linking. I think you will find them interesting.

Learn from them and pass it on to other men and males for their survival in the mine field of relationships and chaos management.

Here is the link...and the thread is called.."I feel like I am being pulled back into an unhealthy relationship."

www.abovetopsecret.com...

Hope this helps further your understanding of some things about relationships.

And thanks again for the surprise reply,.
Orangetom

Maybe it's just me but talking online about your romantic relationships, especially with another member of the same forum, seems to me to be a bit crass, lacking good taste, and generally in bad form. If anyone is seeking relationship advice, at least have the decency and self-respect to not mention the other party by name.
I'm embarrassed that such advice even needs to be given. This is ATS, not the Jerry Springer show.

reply to post by whitewave


Whitewave,

Good point..thanks for bringing it up.

Orangetom

reply to post by orangetom1999


As far as I recall I've never been on the "relationships" forum. I always just assumed it was a sort of "Dear Abby" kind of question and answer forum. You know, one of those "I'm going to a different college than my S.O. Do you think a long-distance relationship will work?" I had no idea it would be an airing of dirty laundry. Just causes bad feelings all around so, imho, is not practical or useful. I thought that was what facebook was for. LOL.

That said, I hope they can work things out enough to continue with civility on ATS.

reply to post by whitewave


I hope they can work it out one way or another in civility as well.

I have no interest in having a facebook account ..nor twitter nor whatever that thing was so many years ago..My Space or such??

Never desired any such thing.

I believe some of the uncivility in the chat rooms ruined me on such things.

As to Jerry Springer...yes..indeed. I get plenty of that at work on the clock.


Thanks,
Orangetom

Seeing how much fun this is, would anyone on ATS like to hook up with me, then we can create our own crazy threads and it will be so much fun.


Applicants shoot me a u2u, stating why you think we'd make a great crazy couple and what petnames you'd like me to call you, a tasteful nude is expected as well.

I SAID TASTEFUL!

J heated and Miss Sky...

Back on page 7..I gave a definition via Warren Farrell of Pornography or phrased another way .."Obscenity."

Here..

In case you do not understand this of which I am explaining ...DR Warren Farrell has a definition of this behavior ...

Making ones dreams , beliefs, expectations, come true cheaply and without RISK.
This means someone else gets used up to reduce your RISKS.

What Dr Farrell gives is his definition of Pornography. Obscenity. Another word for it is Objectification of a partner.

I am going to add another quality or term to this definition.

"Without Rejection."

Obscenity or Pornography..

Making ones dreams , beliefs, expectations, come true cheaply and without RISK and Without Rejection.

I take the time to post all of this to add to the dimensional understanding of this in an attempt to illustrate once again..that it is not just men who are obscene or Pornographic in order to not suffer rejection or gain access to their beliefs..but women do this as well.

It is just that no one notices or understands that it is obscene or put another way ..Pornographic..in it's conduct.



A fellow I know with whom I work...Jack..(Not his real name) him and his wife had been fighting and rather hostile for a couple of days before he spoke to me about it as we have known each other for many years and survived alot of RISK taking.

Well...the third day..the day he spoke to me about it at work...he got a sizeable
settlement check in the mail. He told me that when his wife found out about it ..her whole countinance changed. The fighting and hostility stopped.

Before she knew about the check..he could do no right. Once she knew about the check he was a knight in armour...shining.

I told Jack ..that was his business..but I saw it as an obscenity..pornographic.

When the money runs out he will be back in the same boat as before the money arrived. The money was his running touchdowns without anyone knowing what danger or RISKS he had taken to get it. No one is asking how many times he had put his head on the railroad track for this money. They were only looking for access to it to make their dreams, beleifs, and expectations come true..without RISK and without rejection.

I am not sure Jack understood the fullness of what it was to which I am alluding as he is heavily sports indoctrinated but he knows something is radically changed with the advent of the moneys arrival and that the change was sudden.

Most people would not think of this kind of conduct as obscene...but to me it is ..obscene even pornographic.

For I know full and well the RISKS he has taken over the years to get that moneys.
But socially ..he is expected to default it over to someone and a template in which someone else decides how it is spent or on what it is consumed...without RISK and without Rejection.
When the money runs out ..he will be rejected once again. That is to me obscenity and pornographic.

But it is his house. I do not tell another man how to run his home or drive his bus.
I did however drop a seed in his mind about how the numbers do not add up to good nonsense when you have the tools to think it through. I hope he learns to drop the sports conditioning and beliefs and do some thinking about the real nature of things.
I have shown him about obscenity and Pornography and that it is not always what we are groomed or defaulted to believe. It is much bigger picture than someone is want to let us know or understand.

Thanks,
Orangetom

Either this mans dying or there is someone else. Hope that helps.