Originally posted by Sandcastler
Mercury poisoning is no joke. I know somebody who was poisoned by mercury on a job site a long time ago and he still isn't fully right. He was on
chelation therapy for years. His total personality changed and took a long time to come back close to what it was before. That said, I don't know
if the small amount of mercury in your fillings would do that kind of damage. It is a heavy metal though and will stay with you for a long, long
Sounds like what happened to me, but it does leave you if you detox correctly and well, you get your 'soul' back, as the best way of describing it
is like that, feeling like you are zombified, like your soul has drifted, and you lack enthusiam, will to do anything, and any drive or excitement for
anything and everything seems to exhaust you, even after a long night's sleep. Once I was so exhausted I just couldn't even be bothered to eat food
infront of me as was too much of an effort...
i think depression also sets in after you have detoxed as you realise how many years and lost opportunities went with all that, and how nobody
believed you but called you a lazy person etc. The bitterness also comes from seeing how many people you let down for not being your true self and so
on, when people depended on you or looked upto you for encouragement and inspiration, only to then see you become a lost soul, and thus feel like
they've lost the person they looked to to help them and inspire them. Very sad.
The other thing that makes me bitter is the government and dental associations ruing lives, and futures, careers etc. I was dubbed a genius in music,
and most teachers said they'd only seen my kind of imagination and ear for music twice in their life and had what the 'masters' had. But after
mercury, i stopped playing, as had no motivation, drive, and lost with it the natural ability I had (which has returned after detoxing) to just
instantly have music and lyrics pop into my head as if i heard them beaming into me from a radio station etc...
The memory goes too, so even my music practice was very hard as I just found it hard to learn anything as my memory was just so bad, so instead of
being the prodigious talent i had been, where teachers said I learnt stuff 5 times faster than others, i found myself not really absorbing much and
being unable to focus on my music and would even be so exhausted I'd fall asleep over my instruments...ridiculous ! Like a narcoleptic !
In anycase as I say I didn't really play anymore except the odd burst every 6 months or so, and never even bothered to go to music concerts much or
buy records or listen to them, whereas previously i couldn't get enough of buying records to devour the music in them, and listen to music all day
'learning' all i could by absorbing all the notes and styles etc. It all stopped.
I couldn't even read books anymore as my attention was too short and would fall asleep.... haven't read a book for years.
It is literally like someone sucked away my soul.... Then physical ailments occured, like severe constipations where I'd even get to spend hours on
the toilet every day, and i also had strange pains in my shoulder and kidneys and neck, and i started to think it must be old age at 30 !!!!! nope.
In anycase to cut a long story short, i lost 10 years of my life to this, and with it went my promising career, and its bad enough losing 10 years or
musical progress and career opportunity building, and lost compositions, but what is worst is I've not really played in 10 years either so i lost all
i had known or practiced, and so am very behind. I need to now catch up on lost 10 years development and compositions and career building i could have
done, but need to re learn what i had learnt in the past and get back my skills, and practice, and though my memory and my innate talent for imagining
music has returned, i worry it may have been affected as what fuels it, mu enthusiasm and drive, seem dampened, probably more to do now with the
regrets and anguish i am facing at having lost what I have and thinking that now at 40, it may be very tough to get anywhere with my music, as by the
time I get to where I could have by now, I will be 50 !!! and music industry can be ageist for sure, and even behind the scenes, people could turn
their nose up at me if they think I lack experience and achievements for someone my age.... but that is life...and the bastards in power should all be
sued by everyone who has had mercury fillings whther it has affected them or not, as sticking poison in people when it is a known toxxin and does harm
you, is criminal...