This isn't a post about me, really. I'm going to use my situation as an example because it's the best one I have. I'm hoping to discuss what it's like
for everyone in this situation and maybe talk about ways each of us cope with it. I looked around a bit before deciding to start this thread and saw
that no one really covers this, but it seems to me that this particular problem with being an adbuctee either by the military or by non-humans
deserves more than a mere mention on occasion. It's a symptom of the problem that could use a band-aid, so that folks in this situation can
concentrate more on solving the bigger problem.
So here I am; I've had some interesting experiences in my life, seen some things, woke up in the middle of things that folks wish I didn't remember.
Things like that. When my husband and I first got together he was all about how he believed me and learning things. Four years later, things are
different. And the other day he told me a funny story about how he confused someone at work by explaining to them how I was "delusional".
Which wasn't very funny to me... it kind of hurt actually.
Tell researchers your problem and they might, if you're lucky, talk to you long enough to get some information. Then they dump you like so much trash.
Or you're told you're a cabal slave and to go away. (Really did happen to a friend of mine.) Or maybe you'll get lucky and find a researcher who will
talk to you like a real person, but after a few months you figure out you're being blown off and strung along for some other agenda. (Hello, MUFON!)
Go to forums like this one, hoping for some sort of comradarie, and you get blown off. "They're just dreams." And after a while you start waking up in
the morning feeling like you're the only person in the whole world, because there just isn't anybody out there for you. And maybe you're better off in
a cave someplace, living with bears.
Maybe part of the problem is a handler device to keep you from getting help. Maybe that's just paranoia talking. One thing you know for sure - you're
not crazy. The stinking implant in your bird finger didn't get there all by itself. You aren't trying to get attention or convince someone to write a
book about you... you just want to feel part of the pack as it were. And maybe get to talk about your situation, figure things out, find the truth
hidden in the mess of your brain.
And okay, your personality doesn't mesh with mainstream society so you find yourself distancing yourself from people more and more - especially that
MUFON lady who said you weren't "very bright" for not wanting to kill a harmless ladybug. The thing is, in the end you gotta find solace all alone
even though connecting with others would be kind of nice. And there's no feeling like the emptiness you get when no one believes you, even those that
claim they make it their business to... or your own mate, who used your story as a dating device and now has essentially abandoned you for the
Now I think for you out there, this situation isn't always to such an extreme. But I'm sure there are those out there who know what I'm talking about.
I don't have any advice for it. I keep a personal blog on the matter. I write it under an assumed name, I put information in there on the rare
occasions I find time to collect it, and I put my story down, reread, assess, and try to figure things out. My blog is kind of all I have. :-) But
it's also been the most reliable method I've had for years.
How about the rest of you?
edit on 2/10/2013 by kosmicjack because: fixed title