posted on Feb, 9 2013 @ 07:01 AM
Part of me wonders if this is hell.
We appear, according to available evidence, to be in a dimensional structure of some kind that supports a corporeal existence without readily provable
meaning, purpose, or reason, beyond our desire to instill it with such. We struggle and suffer to perpetuate our existence and hopefully the existence
of our offspring if we're lucky. Some parts of our world are relatively well off, but those aspects of our species which dwell in those areas do so
wittingly or unwittingly by benefiting from the far less pleasant state of affairs elsewhere.
We don't ask to exist. We just do. And then someday, at a totally unpredictable point in time, we meet our demise. We can never objectively know if
anything of us will persist beyond this existence, and live on some level in terror of this possibility all our lives. At least some of us do. Those
of us with spiritual or religious faith of some form or another may escape such existential terror, but for all we know those beliefs may simply be
responses to that terror. I have no way of knowing and have no assertion or opinion on that aspect of reality personally. I wish I did.
Meanwhile, at any given moment, horrible atrocities are being committed by other human beings. Rapes, murders, of both adults and children, torture,
dismemberment. You name it, it's probably happening at any given moment. Of course, we manage to compartmentalize our knowledge of this truth, so as
to function and find some degree of peace of mind. But in some sense that's just denial, because it's happening right now whether we accept and
acknowledge it or not.
As our lives go on, everyone we ever knew or loved or admired from afar dies. Or we die first. And as we age, we can look forward to increased
suffering, disease, and probably debilitation. We may get lucky and find love and friendship along the way that is profound and lasting enough that it
eases the pain of this reality. But not everyone does, contrary to popular belief. There are people who wander through life alone and face these
challenges alone regardless of their character and treatment of others. Reality, as society, it seems, does not always necessarily reward good
intentions and good will with like minded companions in life.
But even if you do find companionship, either you or they will die, and one of you will have to suffer the unbearable grief of their loss. Now, we may
say, "that's all part of life." And that's true. It absolutely is. But if it's possible none of it matters in the grand scheme of things and we
all just live through all of that suffering and if we're lucky joy, and then die, then to me... that makes this reality a decent candidate for what
some would call hell in my mind.
Just a possibility I consider sometimes. I don't necessarily actually believe it. Or in the existence of the mythical hell at all for that matter.