Minister defends parents' right to smack

Here is a map of legality of corporal punishment:

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I think it should be legal, light smacking is far from child abuse if it is used rarely and for a good reason.

I don't really agree with smacking. However ... I do agree with using belts. Pain is universal. In my opinion, if their butt isn't bruised, you didn't spank them hard enough. They'll just learn to hide it better instead of not doing it again.

We have two boys, and while both have been given light taps on the hand a few times, we don't go down the 'smacking route' if we feel there's other options.

The only time they got a tap on the hand, if the times when they were about to touch something that would have put them at risk..i.e. about to touch the fire, or attempt to open a cupboard where cleaning stuff is kept, that sort of thing.

As a boy, i was literally beaten by my stepfather...i'd like to think that it did me no real harm, but i'm not so sure.

I was whipped around the back of my legs with a leather dogs lead more than once, and was put across the knee and hit with an open hand so hard and so many times, that i felt i would suffocate with the pain.

If anything, it made me more rebellious not less...and i have always had a very strained and distant relationship with him because of it.

He thought he was doing the right thing, he got the same from his Father.

That kind of cycle needs to be broken not perpetuated.

We find it much more effective to remove toys, TV, sweets etc, and it doesn't cause you to feel guilt, or your kids to deeply resent you.

It's about getting the right balance.

Does one tap?........mmmmmm no.

Does one batter? Obviously not.

It's somewhere in the middle, but where?

The current law is about as sane and sensible as we are ever likely to achieve - slap without leaving a mark.

Not perfect, mind - but light years better than the EU block ban.

Spankings are for children 5 and under..only done light, and only done for quick shock value. The typical 5 and under doesn't understand discussions about pros and cons of doing whatever earned them the spanking.

over 5, the only thing your teaching them is fear and solution through violence.

Originally posted by CJCrawley
It's about getting the right balance.

Does one tap?........mmmmmm no.

Does one batter? Obviously not.

It's somewhere in the middle, but where?

The current law is about as sane and sensible as we are ever likely to achieve - slap without leaving a mark.

Not perfect, mind - but light years better than the EU block ban.

Depending on the age of the kid.
I would say having them dig up a 8x4x2 foot hole in the back yard, then fill it in again would teach them a lesson..possibly much harsher punishment than a quick spanking, perfectly legal, and incomprehensibly dreaded by the typical kid...

no anything (xbox, phone, ipad, etc) until the hole is dug up, measured, and filled back in (and maybe either resodded, or a garden planted).

The more serious the issue, the wider and longer the hole.

I was spanked as a child through 13 because I tried to do stupid things,I would go into the room dad would spank me and send me to my room,Then after the appropriate time had passed he would come in to discuss it and release me.
I understood it WAS my fault and I didn't often repeat things.I didn't hate my father in fact I greatly respected him.
But then again the general culture was supportive of polite children.People weren't self absorbed.

reply to post by SaturnFX

no anything (xbox, phone, ipad, etc)

So true, lol. Id say 99 % of children would rather be spanked than have their computer taken away.

My 18 yr old was smacked (with my hand, and not hard) 3 times at approx age 3, first smack was for sticking her fingers into an electrical socket, 2nd was for reaching up to grab a pot from the stove, 3rd was for running out onto the road...

These were all situations that she could have been seriously injured or killed and as well as the initial smack, she was told why she should not do these things. After that, I never needed to smack her again, the tone of my voice said it all. I only had to use that tone of voice, usually only had to say three words (Right, That's Enough!) and she would modify her behaviour.

She's a well rounded, well behaved young adult now, who has respect, is a model student and has suffered no ill effects from her early chastisement, in fact she's very road aware for a teenager, always uses crossings etc so whilst I most certainly do not agree with beating kids because they're doing something you don't like or because you're angry for whatever reason, I do think that early (and mild) intervention is an effective way to make a young child understand that you are only trying to keep them safe, and with that lesson learned, good communication with your child as they are growing up, leads them to actually listen to you as they know you only have their best interests at heart.

Edit And yes, just saw Saturn's post...removal of the computer and gaming equipment is a very effective punishment for the older child...my daughter's room was never as tidy as when she lost her playstation controllers

reply to post by ollncasino


I didn't know that about the UK. Its commendable to not buy in entirely into the hog wash experiment of a PC world.

No one should beat their kids, but sometimes a smack is necessary. I can count on one hand the times I needed to be smacked. My child will as well I assume. Other kids whose parents don't ever put them in their place you can lose track of how many times they cross the line and SHOULD be smacked.

If you are good you wont ever need to, but sometimes during development an X factor of unpredictability on the part of children can throw all the reason and argument you can have right out the window in favor of wild human nature.

For those instances, a good smack back to reality works wonders and lasts a life time. It has worked up to now anyways. There is no secret to the deplorable state of youth today and the PC crap we were advised to teach them. It is a failed social experiment the philosophy of "equal" relationships between children and adults.

The same way it would be if an apprentice electrician could argue with the master electrician until something goes catastrophically wrong.

reply to post by zedVSzardoz


Your logic is infallable. We are not on equal terms with children. Hopefully we are a bit smarter, but todays society makes me doubt that. As the smarter, more intelligent, and therefore more responsible one we must enforce safety, and good decision making. Letting a 3 year old run the show is insanity.

As I said earlier I have 4 kids, and have never used corporal punishment at all on 3 of them, no need. My oldest however... Sheesh totally different animal, 2 years of war, but I won the war, and now he is an awesome kid, and he hasn't been "smacked" in nearly a decade. He loves his dad immensely, and I would die for him. I simply love him too much to let him run the show unequipped, and unprepared. I frimly believe it would be a completely different story had I not been willing to enforce the rules physically, and repeatedly. When the better solution of reasoning became viable, and worked that is what we used ever since. The physical enforcement enlightened him to the path of reason.