reply to post by Angle
"My staff of power has been broken"
Well, once upon a time two friends and me were looking to buy a hunting cabin. Not to hunt, but to do adolescent things. we were just finished with HS
and we found this POS cabin in upstate NY for less than 15 grand. The land was AWESOME...
so anyways, my really good friend and me were going to try and get it by ourselves but couldnt afford it (DUH), so we had to bring someone else in on
it and everyone else was broke as hell. There was at the time a horrible person living at my friends house after going through a bad divorce. He was a
real scum bag. BUT we werent dicks and he was still a friend in need. My buddy let him live rent free, and well it ended badly. BUT before it did he
was with us while we were looking at this cabin.
One day we went to go see the land one more time to see if it was REALLY worth the head ache. Our scummy friend didnt come with us. We were pissed at
him for a series of somethings he did and spent the whole trip up there and back concocting a plan to put him in his place.
There was another cabin not too far off from the property we were looking at. We always wondered who lived there . We wanted to be good neighbors.
We decided to make up a hot chick with a huge defect. We told our scum bag friend about meeting this incredible woman who blew our minds and showed us
the time of our lives.
We said we partied and spent all night in Babylon. We said we had to get the property because she promissed to show anyone of our friends a good time
and that she was lonely but liked living there.
The way we described her appearance would put Helen of troy to shame. I mean we sounded like the slickest most convincing snake oil/ car salesmen on
earth. He was practically drooling and begging to go up there RIGHT NOW.....
Well, here came the hook. We swore him to absolute secrecy before. We also made the biggest deal about it. He swore on his child and all that. He was
convinced we were about to reveal the biggest secret in his life.
Ok, so we told him that this Goddess confessed that she used to be a man. That she had a sex change and spent her life savings on the most amazing
operation. We again drilled in her incredible appearance. He was eager but confused.
He started to make fun of us, but we switch hit him with rebukes and he shut up before he could even speak.
We then asked him. Would you still want to have the time of your life with this former man? We kept asking him. He kept trying to side track the
question, but we insisted. He was in a car and my friend was driving. There was no where to go.
Then he said it. F-it, yeah. I would do this and that if she was that good looking. I dont care. He got sloppy with his imagination and very graphic.
We were silent and let him go on and on about how it was Ok and that a man is not a big deal to sleep with as a hetero-sexual...ect..
then he noticed we werent talking but ginning like devils. "OUR STAFF OF POWER WAS THEN FORGED"
We erupted in the longest and most profound laughter an evil conspiring mind ever had. His reign of terror was over. We had this over him. When ever
he got out of place, we would remind him "hey Matt, you would do what to Sam?"...yeah we said her name was Sam....
It was glorious and made having him around more bearable.
Then one day another guy we know F-ed a transvestite while on drugs and openly talked about it. Waking up to this man spooning him naked....so he
broke our staff of power....
When ever we tried to use it on our scum bag friend he would just say "yeah what ever at least I didnt F- a guy like Arthur...."
Our mighty staff of power was broken.
When ever we are utterly defeated and our greatness gone, we say...."my staff has been broken"...or "my mighty staff of power has been broken".....in
a Herculean voice...
We called it a staff because we agreed it was pretty evil, like skeletor evil...and considering how we laughed, it sounded like we were skeletor
laughing over He-mans corpse when we broke it to him that we made the whole thing up and he agreed to do weird things to a dude for no reason...
edit on 5-2-2013 by zedVSzardoz because: (no reason given)