Well, sungazing, then having the sun call me out, perceptibly yet, not overtly but I knew. Then walking early spring before the birds came back,
sunshine, and just missed the birds, next morning bird song greeting me. Then a bike race goes on and they stop. Go in make some coffee, yearning
for the birds again. Go out and the birds are singing again through the bike race.
The clouds are horribly depressing and stormy. Now I knew, this was kind of a miracle, and I knew afterwards, this didnt just come to me, it was
given to me, but I hold it in my heart forever.
But these dark stormy pink clouds, thick everywhere and then fast moving black thin sheet way up high. I was like yuck, and then suddenly this spirit
moved in me and I told myself this wouldn't do at all. And pictured pink hearts, everywhere for 20 minutes until I was exhausted. Made some coffee
and came out with a cup about 20 minutes again And there were hearts everywhere, pale nice pink and white ones. Upside down, sideways, big, small,
abstracted, no black anywhere.
My ex was suicidal actually, from diabetes and he was in the hospital for some time, off and on, and he was going blind apparently. He had been
trying to get out to see the kids before he couldn't drive any longer. I spent months, without hearing from him after this, and praying, for his
healing, asking for family to progress his love, increase his light, for the Spirit of Peace and Love to be with him and I spent time holding him in
my heart in meditation, and telling him he was the Light, we were all family, he was my brother, and I loved him, as a brother, and to shine his
light, overcome the dark spots in him. I believed in him.
Well, the doctors in the end said their test results and all that hospitilzation when he was really ill must have been an error of some kind. He's
fine He said in the hospital, after he was feeling sucidal that he had a dream with a mutual friend of ours that had passed away, and he knew he was
helping him, that the dream was real and everything changed after that.
Then he answered a wrong number and got a job for the oil industry and is planning on helping his aged father and kids out. I don't know how it will
end, but its the thought that counts at this point for me.
I don't give up on people, and have had so many weird things happen, was sungazing and had this image around me, everything was fake. Kept seeing it
like hansel and gretel, or a story book with pop out images, 3d. Now its more hellish than that, but thats actions, not the way it was set up, we
edit on 30-1-2013 by Unity_99 because: (no reason given)