Dear North Korea,
If you're reading this and actually do intend to launch a nuclear attack on the United States, could you please aim for the bible belt? Anywhere in
the south would be great, but if you could get rid of Louisiana, Kentucky, Kansas, Florida, Mississippi, or Georgia (I think you get the point), a lot
of us would be very appreciative. Anywhere in Texas other than Austin would be a good start, too. You likely won't have that many shots before being
turned to ash, so you should make sure the ones you do have count.
Also, could you do something about our congress when you have a chance?