So I was just diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome

Originally posted by aspiechick
Eh... no

ER... yes.

There would be no need to use "tactical ignoring" practices if some of this behavior was not attention seeking, which is RECOMMENDED by many in the field for Aspergers & other childhood disorders, but to me is a cheap pseudo-psychology tactic. They are simply not getting enough of the right kind of attention & guidance. Some parents expect children to raise themselves so they think it's ok to have big families they can't even afford & when they act out it's time to give them meds or play stupid reverse psychology games w/ them & then the kid has issues all their life because they didn't receive parenting. I don't agree with the tactic but it's THE REALITY. It only makes the kid worse... needing more meds.

Look up what "tactical ignoring" is if you think you know so much about aspergers & why it is so upheld for their ATTENTION SEEKING BEHAVIOR. The simple fact of the matter is that in MANY childhood disorders, they're simply seeking attention because people often don't want to raise their own kids. They expect the TV, school system or a therapist to do it for them who are all too eager to test meds on them because they get kick backs from it.

Furthermore! because of the over diagnosis of Autism thought to be "mild autism" or Aspergers... Aspergers was given it's own separate diagnosis in the 1994 DSM-IV because too many cases of Aspergers was being charged to insurance as Autism, which I have said before and I will say it again IS A DIFFERENT DISORDER.

Unfortunately that was not enough to get people who diagnose their own children based on webpages & personality test scores from bringing their kids in & getting a diagnosis from a doctor who just wants to shove meds down their throat. SO, in 2011 the DSM-V made it to where you had to have all 3 of the criteria for being Autistic & eliminated a diagnosis for Aspergers altogether as an Autism spectrum disorder. I don't care how many people say it's Autism, it's not the same thing, but big pharma still pushes it across the web. They're not DUMB. They know how many NET DOCTORS are out there!

And to you people who think the severe disorder of Autism is being shy, introverted or "in your own world"... you're buying into the web craze & you are COMPLETELY misunderstanding the entire criteria.That's not what is meant by being "in your own world" They are DISCONNECTED. UNABLE to respond normally!

These webpages are there so you'll think your "shy" or "quiet" child MUST be Autistic, right?

Hell, they've got GROWN ADULTS all of the sudden thinking they might be Autistic even if they hit every development bench mark on time, they will put them on meds as well!

Autism is diagnosed very early in life, because it is a DEVELOPMENTAL DISORDER

Autism is HARD to overlook!

These kids *often* can't SPEAK, can't WALK, can't even look you in the eye. A lot of them are thought to be deaf or retarded. The first thing they do is put them through hearing tests because THAT is what they mean by "in your own little world" They can't ACKNOWLEDGE their own parents. They have a severe brain disorder. They are *NOT* just "wired different" or "introverts"

Introvert a& extrovert is just a broad personality description which has NOTHING to do with Autism. It's not a matter of mere personality types. It's a severely debilitating disorder & a lot of these kids are actually very social once they find a path for that kid to communicate... a lot of time with pictures or something like that.

They can be extroverts OR introverts. It's got nothing to do with personality, but with FUNCTIONING.

If a child gets up to the age of 5 & has hit the development benchmarks in reasonable time, then it is HIGHLY UNLIKELY that person will EVER truly fit the criteria of Autism.

This is another part of the reason they have had to separate it & separate it some more & they KEEP having to re-establish these separate guidelines because psychologists STILL find ways to get around it. It's a hell of a lot easier for you to get an insurance company to pay for your child being seen by specialists if they have Autism, then if they have something like Aspergers.

By law, a doctor can claim an older child or adult has aspergers, but they cannot make the same claim with Autism because it's kind of hard to miss something that damn severe, regardless of which end of the spectrum it's on.

You can read for YOURSELF that there is a list of severe symptoms that must be met & it is directly due to the over diagnosis issue & all the people thinking their child has Autism because they read a webpage.

If it happens, you are likely dealing with a case of FRAUD, which happens all the time in the medical & psychiatric field to obtain more revenue.

As for Aspergers in children, YEAH... a lot of it is mere attention seeking behavior because that's what children DO & parents of today often do not want to take the time to give a child the positive attention they NEED & keep them IN LINE.

reply to post by NotAnAspie


May I just kindly disagree with your wall of text there for a bit.


So you say that Asperger's could be a trait into getting attention because of large families, well let me throw in some of my experience.

I actually come from a very small family...just started out with me and my sister. I will admit I did do things as a child that could be considered attention seeking, but most of the time, I kept to myself. Usually it got me into more trouble than I can ask for...ie deciding to climb over a fence to pet a cow, and getting stuck in cow poop as a result...then running through a burdock patch looking for farm kittens to play with and getting an entire plant caught in my hair....playing with a dead crow because I thought it would be an awesome pet...

My family members have all attested to me going off by myself, or secluding myself in a corner with various playthings.

Of course I would interact with my cousins and that, but I wanted no part of it, as I'd rather want to play with non-human items (including chicks and ducklings my grandpa used to raise in a cardboard box in the kitchen).

Was this a cry of attention? Was I trying to point out that little Toastman wasn't getting enough love from ToastMom and ToastDad? On the contrary. I simply just didn't want to.

I've gotten plenty of love and cuddles from my parents, even after their eventual divorce, and I had a few friends and that in school. In fact, such interaction could be seen as a path to a normal human developing.

But there was always something that held me back, like if I was stuck in a dimension where I was invisible to others and could only interact with objects and animals.

The point i'm trying to get is...you're making it sound like I, and possibly anyone who has an ASD, are just attention w***ing kids who always get pushed off to the side and neglected. That we're just unloved losers.

Well my family still loves me, even though I don't really show it in ways that most people do, and it's not their fault I turned out the way I did.

reply to post by TheToastmanCometh


Hey Toast, i must have missed this thread when posted but came across it when you told me about your cross stitch and this is the first chance i have had for a proper sit down and think/post etc etc...

i'm pretty sure i am somewhere noticable on the autistic spectrum - not in a "major" way but noticable to me nevertheless, be that on the milder side of aspergers syndrome or high functioning mildly autistic.

i'm pretty much 40, and have spent the last ten years working therapeutically with teens with as/asd and so forth and never really had an answer to the various "differences" i had percieved about the way i handle and prepare for various things in my life etc prior to working in this field and then it all really fitted into place with me (i had next to no knowledge of these conditions prior to this).

things like the sometimes highly ritualised behaviours, hyper focus and abilities in some areas and total inexplicable blocks in others, the huge amount of private rehearsals for some social situations to allow me to handle them without going nuts (usually denying me any sleep the night before them as i tried to process possible outcomes and how to deal with them and so on), the sheer confusion that dealing with some people would cause me, endless post-mortems of conversations/communications and events after the fact to decode them.... amongst other things!

over the last decade i have met and worked with 100's of teens and young adults with these conditions and know that the difficulties i have faced have certainly been a lot milder than their own challenges and often traumas , but the autistic spectrum is a wide one and the correlations are very strong. my own difficulties come and go and can vary due to a wide range of factors, as a younger kid i was a bit of a head in the clouds fruit-loop who found interacting with others a real challenge but had a group of cool friends who were odd balls too, and as adolescence hit things got much more pronounced.. education and relationships became really really tough and later i "self medicated" pretty heavily for a long time which i kinda felt helped in certain ways but obviously that bought more than it's own fair share of problems too. i can tell you that chemical cocktails did not aid me on the long-run.

i've never persisted in seeking a diagnosis with this, by the age i am now i kinda dont think it would pay any dividends for me personally, mainly as i've developed my own strategies for dealing with things throughout my adult life, and well, i'm just me really so screw it

from my point of view, AS may be classed as a disability, and for the stronger cases, i can see why that category is applied (some folks lives are exceptionaly challenged by this afterall), but the simple truth is that AS is only really an issue due to the way the world is set up around us... you dont technically have a problem, you/we just live in a world made for different folk.

You are differently abled, not disabled - i dont mean that in an over PC way, just that you surely have your own deeply awesome skill set and nature. Maybe a lot of folk around you dont see that, but it's true never the less... just like my own crafting i expect yours is of a deeper value to you than many folk who have a "hobby"... things will get a bit easier as you get older, there will be further challenges, but there are for all folk, yours are just different and it's a real shame the world (or at least modern western society) is not aligned with the needs of the autistic spectrum

anyways, i've rambled quite a lot

i hope it kinda makes sense and offers a usefull point of view for you, and for what it's worth when i've seen you around here i've thought you are a proper dude best of luck to you, and if a u2u between us may ever be of use to you, be that for a general chat, a rant or some advice, please dont be shy

I have an employee with aspergers and she is the best I've ever had. She is amazing with details and when she gets into a task she does it to perfection (not that she needs to but she loves doing it to completion). She also excells at math which really helps me out. I only wish others worked as dilligently as she does. Find your strengths and then make your life work around that. What are you good at? What do your truly enjoy doing? If you grew up with some emotional abuse you may need some help with finding those strengths since you have spent your life trying to fit into everyone else's mold but you can and will find them.

reply to post by TheToastmanCometh


Just saw this part and thought I would say good for you for sticking up for yourself. By the way, my sister got stuck in the middle of a cow field when she was a kid too so that's funny to read someone else did that too. Poor kid though - she got in all kinds of mischief like that. Being on the autistic spectrum scale is not attention seeking in any way at all so when you come across people who believe it is simply know that they don't understand the condition, do as you did, and then put energy into good things. Lots of people believe everything is about positive and negative reinforcement. It's not. A way to find your strengths by they way, if you want help doing this is have a psychologist administer an IQ test to you. It will show what your strengths and limitations are (not what the mainstream make it out to be - there is much more to it). Best wishes.

reply to post by Dianec


Thanks diane, I'm actually getting neuropsych testing in a few weeks so I can start getting my life together.

My dad just recently got diagnosed with high functioning autism (Aspergers).
You are no different than who you were before your diagnosis, just as he is no different. You are the same person, the only difference is you have a new label, and in turn, this new label is responsible for your parents treating you with the kindness they should have been showing you regardless.
Don't curse yourself for having it, it could be so much worse.
You're still able bodied, able minded.
Think of all the people with autism whose parents have never heard them speak, or have never hugged their parents or loved ones because they can't stand to be touched.