posted on Jan, 17 2013 @ 02:08 PM
If you have never heard of it, I will educate you here today about the Poppadom Effect. This phenomenon is blighting Curry Houses up and down our
nation today. The Poppodom Effect seems especially prevailant after you have had a few too many jars as well, so don't say I didn't warn you.
Right lets cut to the chase, what is the Poppodom Effect? Well the Poppodom Effect is what happens when you walk into your favourite curry house and
you sit down and are presented with a menu. I normally know what I want before I go in there but for the sake of cerimony I spend a few minutes
browsing the menu before I order my customary Chicken Tikka Vindaloo, Garlic Naan and a Tandori Chicken starter. So here comes your waiter, he brings
you Menu, he brings you drink..... then boom out of nowhere he asks, would you like poppodoms sir?
Damn I am sitting here thinking to myself, I wish you never asked that question. What is going through my head now is that I know I want the variety
of a starter and I always struggle to eat my curry and naan and I certainly shouldn't be jeaprodising this by going all out on Poppadoms before my
meal starts. But then my thoughts do a 180, I start to think, what am I going to do in the lead time to my starter, which could be up to 10 minutes,
I'll be damned if I am making small talk with the wife, anything but small talk with the wife I think. So the waiter seems to have done his job, he
has backed me into a corner he knew I couldn't get out of, I reluctantly say yes please, 1 each sir.
The trouble is and in fairness it is done with the bestest of intentions, the chirpy old waiter brings you out 2 each. I was thinking when I ordered
the one that it would be taking up valuable curry space in my tummy but now 2... and lest not forget the range of chutneys that come with it to pile
on top of my glorified crisp. We got Lime Pickle, Mango Chutney, Onion Chutney, Mint Yogurt and not forgetting the firery Chillie Chuntney. So here we
go, I got a rumbling tummy and ten minutes to burn before the starter arrives, I just lose all self control. I gorge the stuff down, trying various
combinations of chutneys and then bam mafter it is too late my tummy gives out its first warning sign... it is saying to me Michael I am starting to
get a little full now, then it hits me... I have been done by the Poppodom Effect yet again.
My starter does eventually come, but my tummy not so rumbely now and I enjoy it very much still. But then comes the killer, my Vindaloo and Garlic
naan and the brick wall slaps me right in the face. This should be the pinnacle of my meal yet I am struggling to get more than a few mouths full in
my now buldging tummy. Then much to my own disappointment, I give in... half a naan and 3/4 of my curry left.
Damn you Poppodom Effect, you got me again.
This folks is a classical explaination of the Poppodom Effect, make sure you spread the word to help reduce the number of future innocent individuals
from being taken hold by the Poppodom Effect.