The beezzer's Court The 2nd Amendment The Trial

Okay, I think we are ready. Court is now in session.

The prosecution will consist of;
IKNOwSTuff
superman2012

They will be arguing the current validity of the 2nd AMendment

The Defense will consist of;
wrabbit2000
sonny1
GoOfYFoOt

They will be defending the validity of the 2nd AMendment.

The jury will consist of;
HomerinNC
watchitburn
buster2010
mamabeth
Destinyone
Dembow
charles1952
WP4YT
crappiekat

The fate of the free world will rest in their hands.

Motive, means, opportunity will be discussed.

Prosecution will go first.

Each side can cross-examine.

Both sides will have time for a closing statement.

Please, no interuptions from everyone else. I will run to the mods and tattle-tell on everyone! I have notified the mods and have asked that they pay close attention to this thread.

U2U me for any specific questions.

Chitchat can continue here.
www.abovetopsecret.com...

*bangs gavel*

Let the case begin!

If it please your honor I would like to make my opening statement on behalf of the prosecution.

We are here today ladies and gentleman to discuss a matter of grave importance that has divided many of us normally friendly folk here at ATS.

Myself and my co counsel will be arguing today for the abolishment of the 2nd Amendment (pauses while court gasps dramitically)

This is not about gun rights or gun ownership but more so about the terms of said ownership, to own a firearm is a great responsibility and one which should not be taken lightly.

After going through boxes and boxes of documents with my co counsel and our staff we have come to the conclusion that to remove guns from American society would be akin to taking croisants from the French, AFL from the Aussies or bad teeth from the English.

These things are part of our national character and while outsiders may not understand or appreciate them its a part of who we are.

We ask the members of the jury to forget any prejudices or preconceived notions they may have and approach the issue with an open mind and to rule based ONLY on the merits of the arguments put forward in this courtroom.

We will show (using mainly the 2nd Amendment itself) that it is no longer equipped to deal with the realities of todays society and on that basis it needs to be replaced with something more comprehensive and less ambiguous.

Thank you your honor

reply to post by IkNOwSTuff


Thank you Councillor.

We will pause and wait to see if Defense would like to add an opening statement.

Sir?

GoOfY LeFt FoOt, Esq. for the Defense, here...

I have a Motion to Dismiss, based on the lack of charges levied against my client.

The Prosecution has failed to bring proper charges, they have failed to secure an indictment from a Grand Jury, and my client has been in limbo, unable to provide for his country and fellowman, since this whole debacle started. And his family is now receiving death threats!

I ask that Your Fluffyness, immediately Dismiss this Court and order my client's immediate release!

Unless someone can explain what the Prosecution meant by:

Originally posted by IkNOwSTuff
reply to post by GoOfYFoOt

 

I formally charge the 2nd with being a very naughty boy!!!!!!!!

edit on 13/1/2013 by IkNOwSTuff because: (no reason given)

...and how it is a crime, you must dismiss!

reply to post by GoOfYFoOt


Objection over-ruled.
The move to dismiss, denied.

As this is an international court, we (the court) would like to hear the argument as the 2nd Amendment has been placed on trial by the government(s), the media, and the public.

We request a brief continuance, Your Honor, until co-counsel for the defense, arrives...?

Originally posted by GoOfYFoOt
We request a brief continuance, Your Honor, until co-counsel for the defense, arrives...?

The court will allow that.

I would like to draw your honors attention to the defences attire, the fact he is wearing his everyday clothing along with his facetious claims that we havent found reasonable evidence for this trial to take place tells me he is not taking this seriously, the fact his co counsels are late is also a slap in the face to the integrity of this court.

I move to find all co counsels in contempt of court (pauses once again for dramatic gasps and mumurs from the gallery)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Sits down angrily*

Prosecution also asks for a quick recess as his GF has just told him he is smelly and needs a shower

*watches the procecution's theatrics, yawns and goes back to doodling in his notepad and whispers to Des*
"Hey, when's lunch?"

Sorry double post

reply to post by HomerinNC

Although you have an amazing tattoo, and you are a very intelligent man, I must ask that you not flirt with the gorgeous women of the jury.

Originally posted by IkNOwSTuff
I would like to draw your honors attention to the defences attire, the fact he is wearing his everyday clothing along with his facetious claims that we havent found reasonable evidence for this trial to take place tells me he is not taking this seriously, the fact his co counsels are late is also a slap in the face to the integrity of this court.

I move to find all co counsels in contempt of court (pauses once again for dramatic gasps and mumurs from the gallery)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Sits down angrily*

Prosecution also asks for a quick recess as his GF has just told him he is smelly and needs a shower

Request for contempt denied.

Request for a bath, apporved.

reply to post by beezzer


With all due respect...your honour this is just utterly asinine. I understand that you intend to hold a mock trial, but let me point out some major flaws in your setup: You need to have equal representation on both sides, you simply cannot appoint a jury consisting of your "buddies" and expect anyone to take this the least bit seriously. I can understand if this thread was intended as an attempt at bringing levity to the asinine arguments being heard on both sides of the issue, but if it was not, than you need to rethink the whole thing, starting with a random selection of jurors and equal representation on both sides that consists of somewhat serious, rational people and not just those who will attempt to insert comic relief into a very serious matter (you know who you are). Also, it is well understood by me and many others (although sadly not the majority of American citizens, who also happen to be fools, such is the paradigm in any society) that all rights outlined in the Constitution, and all amendments therein are inalienable and, as such, are not subject to any annulments if you expect your country to steer clear of civil war. Also, the 2nd amendment is the teeth of the entire constitution, and, therefore, if it is removed, all others will follow quite swiftly. In short, I move for a mistrial....your honour....

The court calls for a 2 hour recess.

Smoke 'em if you got 'em, folks.

Good Morning, Ladies and Gentleman of the World Court of Opinion....

While I do not believe it is the intent of the DA to make a mockery of this court, I must insist that he is being quite near-sighted. I can only attribute this to his lack of understanding of my client, and perhaps, a bit to that silly wig, but anyway...

My client, the Second Amendment to the US Constitution, is not a criminal! He has done NO wrong, and in fact, has done nothing but preserve his Country's way of life, in the most respected and revered way possible!

There can be NO fault, found in those 27 simple, yet elegant words. NO meaning could possibly be inferred other than what has been written in them. There can be NO debate! Only the power and assertion put forth, under the threat of harm to any and all in this great Country...The Men that penned these words, did not come to them lightly. Of ALL of the words those Men conceived...this portion...The accused standing right here before you today, is of the utmost significance. For without these words, ALL of the others would, by now, have been forgotten!

"A well regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed."

Thank you, Ladies and Gentleman of the World Court of Opinion and also, Thanks to our Jury...


Your Fuzzyness, I do believe that my co-counsel also has a prepared opening statement...I defer to him...

reply to post by xXxinfidelxXx


I will for this one time, use the trial thread to explain that this court was convened to rationally discuss the merits and validity of the 2nd Amendment.

It has been my experience that you do not need to be serious in order to illustrate serious matters. The point can be made in a variety of ways.

I am also a strong believer in free speech. Providing an opportunity for all sides to have a trial of sorts is my way of honoring that commitment.

What will be determined in this court?

Perhaps a greater understanding on both sides.

Perhaps nothing.

But if we don't at least try to impart our positions on this issue and continue bickering then we will be doing exactly what the government wants. They want us divided. They don't want us talking, learning from each other.

Court asks for recess.

*bangs gavel*

If defense is ready, lets hear their opening statement.

Then allow prosecution to present their case.

reply to post by beezzer

**WITHOUT PREJUDICE**

What will be determined in this court?

I, for one, will have a better understanding of the 2nd amendment. Being a Canadian, I think this is what some American ATS members want. Foreigners to understand their laws/constitution before they start speaking off the cuff. If you want isolationism and no one to care about American issues, then you might want to think twice before calling yourself a Patriot. If you love your country that much, you would want everyone to know why it is great, not just on your terms.

reply to post by superman2012


Your Honor! Would you please ask the prosecution to quit being so logical off the record, while being so illogical on the record...! It's seriously confusing and hampering my ability to stay in character!

If a right is so fragile that it cannot withstand the test of a court, then is does not deserve to be a right.

*ahem*

Okay folks, back in character, please.