Would you take a ride from a stranger??

reply to post by yourmaker


Thats the trouble with this world. It is stupid. And so would you be if you encouraged her to go without checking him out first. If hes genuine then as i said,. A few simple checks will find out and put her family at ease. Common sense i think its called

Originally posted by Meldionne1
Happy homemaker , how old are you? And I mean no disrespect, but I'm curious. ..because I see a 55 year old man rushing in to be your " knight in shinning armor" . And I see you happy to get away from your current situation,...until...you realize he may like you or want more from you than you want. Please have a secondary back up plan if this doesn't pan out. ....again, I mean no disrespect, but I see an anterior motive .
And, ...you said you have a brain tumor? So.....I hope you are doing something about that and not running from your health issue? ( but no need to answer, just a suggestion)

No disrespect. I'm 42. I have stressed to him that I am not looking for a relationship. He isn't either. He's in the middle of a divorce from his wife, as I am from my husband. Manhater has wanted me out of her home for quite some time now and vocalizes it often. Especially when she's tipsy. She will be loudly vocal. I try to avoid those situations because I don't like fights, but then I just get chased to my room. I've put my iPod in my ears loudly she just gets louder until eventually she gives up about 30 minutes to an hour later. I have money, so if necessary, I do have a back up. I'm a very, very paranoid person by default due to past trauma. I want to stress that this isn't something I just willy nillied out of the blue. I have a child to think about. I can't put myself in danger because I have her to think about.

Yes I do have a brain tumor. Right now it is benign. I'm on a list to be seen by a neurologist but that list is impressively long. I need to have it checked again. It is in an area that they don't like to operate if they can help it. One of the side effects is very severe migraines and narcolepsy. My copy of the MRI is in Manhater's coat closet by the front door, but she and my family like to believe I'm faking all of this. Two years ago I fell asleep at the wheel coming home from the beach with my daughter and almost drove into a 6 foot ditch. What woke me? The car behind me honking it's head off. I can drive, I'm just scared out of my mind to because I worry about the day when I WON'T wake up and I kill someone, and/or myself. I believe in personal responsibility. I can't have that on my conscious.

Are you driving without a license? You would have been ordered not to drive with this diagnosis.

Originally posted by bourbon2nite
Are you driving without a license? You would have been ordered not to drive with this diagnosis.

edit on 1/7/2013 by bourbon2nite because: (no reason given)

My neurologist did not take my license away. My license did expire without me realizing it. Manhater has been on my case to renew it, but I haven't felt comfortable renewing it. I would much rather prefer getting a non-driver's license until I see the neurologist because my instances of falling asleep at the wheel and drowsiness have increased as have the migraine amounts and intensity.

Do you have your own computor? If not will you have one available to you when you arrive at your destination? Can we expect you to update us and discuss the outcome of this trip with us in this thread? Make sure that manhater is available to join in the discussion.

Originally posted by bourbon2nite
Do you have your own computor? If not will you have one available to you when you arrive at your destination? Can we expect you to update us and discuss the outcome of this trip with us in this thread? Make sure that manhater is available to join in the discussion.

Right now I have 2 broken laptops that need repair. I'm using one of Manhater's. She said she would give me one of hers, but whether that still holds true or not, I don't know anymore. If not, my coworker's daughter is dating a young man who repairs laptops. She said I could use her computer until he fixes my laptop for a small fee. I do plan on updating. I plan on staying with ATS for a long time. I happen to like it here. As long as I'm welcome that is. I love my sister immensely. I have no problem with her joining the discussion. I wish words weren't said. And we were closer, but, well, what can you do, right?

I am assuming that since you were in bed when sis replied that you will be reading this when you return from school? Im curious as to your reponse to her remarks?

Originally posted by butcherguy
reply to post by Manhater

 

You should tie her up until she wises up a bit.

So many people disappear each year. So many people are found murdered, as a result of going to meet 'someone'.

It is a very risky thing she is doing. I feel for you. It is tough knowing that a loved one is going to do something risky and they will not listen to your advice.

I love that this came from someone called"Butcherguy".
But he's not wrong, people purposely ask someone to meet them online just to abduct or kill someone.
It's really a sick place we live sometimes, have her low jacked.

I never said you were faking, you just let it consume your whole life. [I can't do this, and I can't do that, and when someone asks you to do something, it becomes oooh this]. What I am worried about, you are not only putting yourself in danger but you are putting my well being and your daughter's well being in danger by letting this guy A) come to MY house in the first place (a Horror writer mind you-wonder where he gets his ideas from or maybe your next on his list of books) and B) if you even make it that far, to your daughter's, her whereabouts. Where's her safety? The only person you are thinking about in all this, is yourself.

What's to say he takes care of you after he lets you see your daughter, he already knows where she's at, and what's to say he doesn't go after her next, and then after he's done with her makes one more stop to my place?

You can tell me he's safe, this and that until your blue in the face, I still don't trust him.

This guy is driving from one state, a bit from where I live, to my state, to your daughters state and then to your friends state. Then he's going to drive back?

Do you not see a problem with that?


You don't this guy from Jack Adam, you are only going by what your AKA co-worker suggested and is his her friend, That you knew 10 years ago.

Please.

That's my concern.

And, I would even be willing to work with on your Narcoleptic episodes of driving. You can sell your car and from the sale, you will buy a train ticket to get to your destination. I mean what's the point in owning car, if you don't want to get your license and you are in fear of driving? You don't need it.

At least you get to your destination safe. That's all that matters.

You don't see anything nefarious with a guy driving at least 4 states away coming to pick you up, then to drive you 5 states to see your daughter; roughly a 13 hour drive, then your going to drive 2-3 states to your destination? Plus, he's taking care of the U-Haul and car tow? So anything can happen between then and there, and do you think your father, your brother or I, are going to be in the vicinity to drop everything to help you?

Ugh, I have another headache.

reply to post by happyhomemaker29

I'm a very, very paranoid person by default due to past trauma. I want to stress that this isn't something I just willy nillied out of the blue. I have a child to think about. I can't put myself in danger because I have her to think about.

You don't seem very paranoid to me if you're venturing a ride with a guy you never met, whom you know nothing about. You don't seem to be thinking about your child's well being or your well-being, or mine for that matter.

reply to post by Manhater

(a Horror writer mind you-wonder where he gets his ideas from or maybe your next on his list of books)

Why don't you bother your arse to read some, instead of just making wild assumptions?.
Sounds like the sort of thing my 85 year old dad said the first time he saw Hellraiser.

Originally posted by Manhater
I never said you were faking, you just let it consume your whole life. [I can't do this, and I can't do that, and when someone asks you to do something, it becomes oooh this]. What I am worried about, you are not only putting yourself in danger but you are putting my well being and your daughter's well being in danger by letting this guy A) come to MY house in the first place (a Horror writer mind you-wonder where he gets his ideas from or maybe your next on his list of books) and B) if you even make it that far, to your daughter's, her whereabouts. Where's her safety? The only person you are thinking about in all this, is yourself.

What's to say he takes care of you after he lets you see your daughter, he already knows where she's at, and what's to say he doesn't go after her next, and then after he's done with her makes one more stop to my place?

You can tell me he's safe, this and that until your blue in the face, I still don't trust him.

This guy is driving from one state, a bit from where I live, to my state, to your daughters state and then to your friends state. Then he's going to drive back?

Do you not see a problem with that?


You don't this guy from Jack Adam, you are only going by what your AKA co-worker suggested and is his her friend, That you knew 10 years ago.

Please.

That's my concern.

As I told you last night, just because he writes horror, doesn't mean he murders. Stephen King writes horror, is it from prison? How about Dean Koontz? There are lots of famous horror writers, doesn't mean they're mass murderers. Let's take Crime writer Ann Rule. Is she a famous Jewel Thief? I understand your trepidation but instead of talking to me, like an adult I might add, you went behind my back. I found out by a PM by one of the responders in here. So not cool. And even more so, you decided to go into my facebook page. I mean seriously, we are not 9 years old snooping in each other's room looking for each other's diary! It's called being an adult. You want to talk to him on the phone? Or have dad talk to him? I'll be happy to pass the number along. Did you bother to ask? No. Why? Because you barely say two words to me half the time. He's actually in the middle of authoring another book that I would help write and yes I would get credit, monitary and name. If you let me finish my conversation last night instead of being dismissive, you would know that. You keep telling me to write something, this is a good way for me to learn how to get a jump into it. I'll bet dollars to donuts that won't be good enough for this family though.

reply to post by happyhomemaker29


Sadly it doesn't sound like you and your sis are going to agree on this decision.......but ultimately it is YOUR decision to make.

I can't imagine living in a home your not welcome in is good for your health. She wants you out of HER home, she doesn't want to meet the person you are driving with at HER home. Her logic is paranoid, IMO....sorry Manhater...your sis has provided information about her health, her plan and her reasons for making this trip in a well thought out manner.

The odds are much more likely that this KNOWN man just wants to take a road trip, make a new friend, and go visit his old friend....he also wants to collaborate with your sis on a writing project....what better way then on a long road trip to do this ! It's highly unlikely his intention is to harm you, your sis or your daughter.....old "hippie" writers aren't generally "serial killers".....

I hope your sis will look at the information you have provided and reconsider her position against your decision....
Have a wonderful trip and visit with your daughter....hope you and your sis work through this before you go...

If anybody in their right mind thinks that this is safe, you need some serious help. She can take a train or a bus to get to her destination safely without any recourse of her actions. She'll be on the road, change her mind and I'll get the call. What else is new...Whatever, this time she's on her own. I have a life and her and her antics are not going to interfere. Period. She wants to be stupid, she can learn from her lesson.

Originally posted by MountainLaurel
reply to post by happyhomemaker29

 

Sadly it doesn't sound like you and your sis are going to agree on this decision.......but ultimately it is YOUR decision to make.

I can't imagine living in a home your not welcome in is good for your health. She wants you out of HER home, she doesn't want to meet the person you are driving with at HER home. Her logic is paranoid, IMO....sorry Manhater...your sis has provided information about her health, her plan and her reasons for making this trip in a well thought out manner.

The odds are much more likely that this KNOWN man just wants to take a road trip, make a new friend, and go visit his old friend....he also wants to collaborate with your sis on a writing project....what better way then on a long road trip to do this ! It's highly unlikely his intention is to harm you, your sis or your daughter.....old "hippie" writers aren't generally "serial killers".....

I hope your sis will look at the information you have provided and reconsider her position against your decision....
Have a wonderful trip and visit with your daughter....hope you and your sis work through this before you go...

Sadly I don't think that's going to happen but thank you. I'm even willing to sacrifice time with my daughter and visit her on another time by bus to calm everyone's nerves. I have texted my father his cell phone number, his real name and his non de plume, what they do with that information is up to them. I have given them the date of my departure, I have told my friend I will meet up with him at a local McDonald's nearby to calm Manhater's nerves, so he won't have her address to come back and murder her with. I won't visit my daughter right now so he can come back and murder my daughter at a later date as Manhater fears. He's paying for the rent-a-car, which he does not have to do. He knows I'm on a very limited budget, that was why he offered to allow me to coauthor. He's coauthored with others before with success, so he doesn't see why not doing it again. I'm willing to give it a try. I've never done it before and if it helps with my money situation and helps jump start ideas for another book, why not? I'm trying to do everything as cautiously as possible, heck, his mother doesn't want him making the trip because she thinks I'M going to murder HIM. *Shaking head at whole thing*

Originally posted by Manhater
If anybody in their right mind thinks that this is safe, you need some serious help. She can take a train or a bus to get to her destination safely without any recourse of her actions. She'll be on the road, change her mind and I'll get the call. What else is new...Whatever, this time she's on her own. I have a life and her and her antics are not going to interfere. Period. She wants to be stupid, she can learn from her lesson.

edit on 8-1-2013 by Manhater because: (no reason given)

This right here, is how my family displays it's love. And there's the "I told you so". Sadly I didn't leave before it struck, but that's ok. My "antics" have not disrupted your life. I've done everything possible to just stay out of your way. You're either super nice, or really ***chty. I never know how you're going to be. I know for a fact how you're going to be if you're drinking. And THAT I'm done with. I'm done with the abuse. I put up with 18 ****ing years of abuse during my marriage only to have Kait pile on more, and then you pile on even more. I'm done.period. End of story. See when you're drinking you tell the truth and when you said you hate my M*ing guts and wished I never came down here and never wanted to see me again. I got it. Loud and clear. But you know what. Your my sister. No matter how much you've hurt me, I will always love you. I'm just sorry you never felt that way.


By the way, my car will be towed behind the rent a car. So if I "change my mind" on the road, why do I need to call manhater about this? Her's a really messed up thought. Can't I just untow my car, get in, and drive it myself, taking lots of rests when I'm tired? I may not WANT to drive my car, but if it becomes a necessity, can't I take back roads using my tom tom at a slower speed, but still get there and take naps in parking lots when I get tired? It just a crazy thought. I'm wondering why I would have to call you to the rescue. I know this family seems to think that because I'm in the middle of a divorce I can't live my life now. News flash, I'm getting a divorce, I'm not dead. My life is moving on and you guys don't like it. You have all tried running my life in one way or another for years, and sometimes it was easier just to let you. My husband let me see that. Well no more. It's my life. As I keep telling you, you are my younger sister, not my mother. Point of fact, I have no mother. I have for the most part raised myself, and sometimes you, since I was 5, I'm not going to stop now. I can, and do know how to live my life, and I'm sorry if this bothers you. I'm not Stephanie. I'm not going to live out on the street doing drugs. But that's what you see and that's fine.

Where do you get this idea, that if you don't like the trip that the guy is just going to be nice and take the car off the tow for you? That's if it doesn't work out. And curious, how do you plan on taking the car off the tow, if the guy refuses?

Do you realize how many things that can go wrong on this trip of yours?

Go the safer route and take a train up there. That's all we are asking.

Manhater and happy I want to tell you my story, I had a Brother, the last day I saw him we argued and had a fight, he went on holiday and drowned and I never saw him again, I regret that fight and I think about him every day.
We fought like cat and dog but I know he loved me and he knew I loved him but to continue fighting without trying to understand each other is getting you both no where.
Please you are blood you have a bond like no other so please both of you sit down and try and sort it out, do not leave each other with such petty feelings between you.
I just do not want you both to regret your fights one day.
Both of you take care BM xxx

Wait a minute. You are getting a rental car and towing another car behind it? I doubt that. Do you mean a rental such as a u-haul? If you are taking a u= haul to carry belongings what happens to them if you unhitch your car?

Why does he not just drive you in your car and rent a car to return?

So many little things just do not add up here?