How to Become a Mod 101

I saw this posted on a discussion board elsewhere and thought I'd share it. Not meant to reflect on this board in any way, just found it chuckle-worthy.

I was reading over the thread on how to become a mod and I realized how grossly out of date it was. So I decided to make my own topic that would get many great and deserving users modded!

So read up and enjoy your Modship.

Tip #1: PM every mod.
Not just the ones you like. Every and all mods. You will need additional accounts to do this, but the reward is that the mods see you are mindless and worship them without second thought. Which goes on to the second point...

Tip #2: "And Mod said, "I am a jealous Mod.""
Never argue with the mods. This is very important if you want to get "modded". Do not argue with the mods, and agree with everything they say. They are perfect and have never made mistakes. Bash users that say otherwise, because they're probably evil and eat babies.

Tip #3: Follow them into every topic.
It doesn't matter how off-topic you can make the thread, as long as you reply to whatever the mod said you'll get modded that much quicker. Even if what they say makes no sense and you disagree with it, consult tip #2.

Tip #4: Gross use of [face_silly] is key.
This tip shouldn't interfere with your posting habits. Just slap a [face_silly] after it and suddenly your posts are excellent and worth reading. I don't recommend using any other emoticons, and especially not [face_plain]. Use that too much and you will be permabanned.

Tip #5: Post enormous threads.
Don't worry, this isn't as bad as it sounds. Just repeat what everyone has been saying all along and is common knowledge, then combine it all into one gigantic thread. Users won't read the thread, but if you're known well enough by now they'll say "Good read!" just so they can get their +1 postcount. Remember, the object is to get as many replies as possible. Don't worry if some users actually read it and point out its many flaws, you've got the mods on your side, partner!

Tip #6: Make a game that spans many days.
Another important tip. The easiest way to get noticed is to make some stupid-a$$ game that takes forever to complete, and has no reward for finishing. The more players you get, the more popular you will get, and the more the mods will notice you. A quick way is to make multiple games. And don't worry about people spamming your game; as long as they're in your thread you can get away with whatever you want.

Tip #7: Whore yourself on Board Issues
By now you've got the makings of a decent, well-known user. But to truly be branded as a "good user" you've got to go to Board Issues and solve common problems. Likely you can get away with copying and pasting solutions, so use what other users say to your advantage. This is probably the most time-consuming of the other tips, but the reward is modship, so eventually all your hard work will pay off.

And there you have it, my fellow users. Follow my tips and, by Mod's grace, you'll be modded and avoiding the rules in no time. Good luck and Mod Be With You!

#8 Never make a post on how to become a mod.

#9 Never, NEVER pull information from a source without giving it proper citation (ie: link to that source, etc.).

As such, your source of this information is?




seekerof

boards.ign.com...

#10 dont break the rules.

[edit on 26-10-2004 by SpittinCobra]

briliant find!!

Oh wait... you are not a mod, I dont have to kiss your ass!

Seriously, great find. As always, every satire holds some truth....

Or you could be like me and earn your modship purely on breakdancing ability.

I know members who embarass themselves by slavishly following those rules. They will never become mods.

Never wine, "Can I be a mod? Can I be a mod? Can I be a mod? Can I be a mod? Can I be a mod? Can I be a mod? Can I be a mod? Can I be a mod? Can I be a mod? Can I be a mod? Can I be a mod? Can I be a mod?"

Originally posted by wecomeinpeace
boards.ign.com...

Thank you kindly sir/ma'am, wecomeinpeace.


seekerof

I remember a certain Italian pie loving member who wanted to be a mod so bad, but instead got

#11 Let the mods do the moderating .....

Originally posted by Kano
Or you could be like me and earn your modship purely on breakdancing ability.

I knew I'd seen you before.