posted on Dec, 18 2012 @ 06:11 AM
Ok, here goes nothing!! There is a HUGE stigma in America when discussing mental health issues, plain fact!! I know because I used to be one of the
many ignorant (uneducated), hypocrites who would scream from the rafters about these "mental health" diagnosies being bull pucky!! My mother has at
least 3 ascribed to her "bahavior" and my sister has, well I've lost count at this point! I was so afraid of being lumped in with them due to the
genetics of it all and out of fear for my own mental health stability (and many grudges against my mother specifically) that I refused to see any
validity in the mental health field. I still believe that we WAY over medicate in this country, absolutely yes we do and we are far to quick to hand
out a diagnosis based on less than enough information. Hell even family doctors have gotten in on the Big Pharm action!!
HOWEVER, I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby boy on March 17th 1998. He weighed in @ 8lbs 12ozs and got 9's and 10's on his APGAR scale tests
after birth! By 1 month of age he became so cranky and just wouldn't stop crying! We took him to the pediatrician as any "good" parents would do,
they approached it as colic, changed his diet (because I was breast feeding that meant me changing my diet) and prescribed infant gas drops. This did
no good at all. Months went by and we just learned to live with it, swaddling him tightly and rocking him to the sound of running water would usually
get him to sleep soundly for a few hours. By 1 year old he was already walking and saying a few words, which is a little early, but my first son was
early in his development too, so nothing very unusual there. However the issue was that, while he was sleeping through the night at this point, he
was already seemingly going through his "terrible two's" with defiance and tantrums. His favorite word was "no" and he wouldn't think twice
about hitting or throwing something when he was being "denied" whatever it was he wanted.
By the time he started school he already had already been to the ER 5 times to get stitches from self inflicted injuries during his tantrums! During
those first 5 years I was in and out of the doctor's office, on the phone with family and friends, doing research at the library, everything I could
think of looking for advice and guidance!! There was literally no help available. I would hear things like; "he's just all boy" or "he'll grow
out of it" or "he just needs more discipline"! I was already disciplining him more "strictly" than I was comfortable with and usually out of
frustration or outright anger (which is not healthy for either party) and just felt there had to be a better way!
Fast forward 9 years and that brings us to this year. My son is now 14 and has full run of the roost! My other 2 children (both boys, one older and
the other younger by 5 years) and I walk on eggshells so as not to upset the "prince"! He began smoking weed and running the streets, became
sexually active and completely defiant of any and all authority figures! I would ground him, but he would run as soon as I left for work. He only
attends school when he feels like it and everyone else be damned! The school did little to help aside from assigning detentions (which he never showed
for) and out of school suspensions! He is currently on probation, has community service obligations and is on a 10 day stretch of oss!! He is running
full steam ahead on a criminal path at this point and the local law enforcement is more than happy to assist him in becoming an "incarcerated
criminal"! No one had helped me for the entire 14 years no matter how much I begged and cried and even, at times, screamed for them to listen to
2 Saturdays ago I left work early because he had finally reached a breaking point in his behavior (it actually started a few days before)! The amount
of disrespect and pure vile hatred coming out of his mouth, from his eyes and eveen literally oozing out of his pores let me know this was it! Time to
do something major! So I got home and told him were going to the ER to get a psychological evaluation!! He only fought me slightly on this
surprisingly and got in the car. He cussed and screamed at me the whole way there and we waited for hours and hours to be seen by the hospital's
psychologist, but once we did (and my son had even calmed down immensly by this point) he needed only 5 minutes with my precious son to know he needed
immediate hospitalization! I didn't know whether to laugh or cry! A flood of emotions filled me and nothing could compare to the great relief I feltt
that FINALLY someone else saw what I saw and knew what I knew, he needed help that I simply was not able to give him!
We are a week and a half into this now and talking to my son on the phone is like talking to an entirely different person but one who I have always
known was there, underneath all of this chemical imbalance, manic psychotic, and undiagnosed aspergers!!