Why hypenated last names are silly to me

For some reason yesterday I started thinking about these families I know that have hyphenated last names and I wondered how many generations it could go on before people realized it was getting to be a bit much. Here's what I mean:
Bill Smith marries Sally Jones and they become the Smith-Jones family, soon little Cindy Smith-Jones is born.
Larry Edwards and Emma McGee marry and have little Jonny Edwards-McGree.
Later, Jonny and Cindy marry and have little Jimmy Smith-Jones-Edwards-McGee
Somewhere across town, little Susie Johnson-Baker-Matthews-Simpson is born
Years later Jimmy and Susie have little Freddy Smith-Jones-Edwards-McGee-Johnson-Baker-Mathews-Simpson who later marries Jenny Price-Helms-Dart-Nelson-Williams-Goldstein-Wong-Grant to produce young Danny Smith-Jones-Edwards-McGee-Johnson-Baker-Mathews-Simpson-Price-Helms-Dart-Nelson-Williams-Goldstein-Wong-Grant
and so on.
I think people started picking a name less for sexism than avoiding obvious difficulties in introducing oneself. Funny to watch the name list grow though.

Personally, I think using 3 names when clearly 2 will do and ONE is preferred is a sign of insecurity at a very deep level as well as a need to constantly justify and validate one's own existence.

^^ Heavy reply, I know..but I've also put some thought into why some feel the need to make their name a near statement in itself...when no one cares two bits about it. I just want to know what to call someone besidies "Hey You!"

I'm more concerned about people not at least proofreading their thread titles than I am
about people that use hyphenated last names.

just sayin.

I think its time to stick with 2 names, that are in no connection to your family.... it is not the past where you last name is what you do... carpenter, Smith...EdwardSON, RichardSON.. etc.

I see no reason to carry family name since we have all sort of tracking system now.. even then, why do i want to be related to some guy that did something (good or bad)...I can see Bill Gate's son carrying his name...but i don't know....

I think best way to name is...

Your Name(First) + Your Father's(or mother) Name(last), now when you have a kid...

Your kid will have His name(First) + Your Name(Last).

There is reasons, take smith and jones its common so a middle name Smith Lee Jones then a person would know they Smith Jones because of the lee connection. In Ireland they use O' as son of, so O'Donnell for instance say the christian name was john you have John O'Donnell, but in Ireland there are hundreds of thousands John O'Donnelll's so Johan would be called John Hannah O'Donnell or some other name link to the family, so a grandson/daughter could go over to Donegal and say I am the grandson of John O'Donnell and it would mean nothing as they are mostly all O'Donnells but if he said I am the grandson of John Hannah then they know who he is John Hannah O'Donnell not the grandson of John Murphy or John Sweeny O'Donnell. I hope that explains the need for a double barreled name when its a poplular name, Smith and Jones is a very popular name so the need for a middle name is obvious.

My sister uses both her husbands last name and our family name...lol....was important to her for some reason? Thier children have only thier Dad's last name...seemed to work out for them....she always has to buck the system...gotta Love her...

I can understand the sentiment here.

My wife was adopted by her grandparents because her biological parents were 14 & 15 at the time, in Ireland and catholic. The "embarrassment" associated with the birth was significant back in the early 70's and so was strategically hidden without "outsiders' knowing - suffice to say, it was a 12 month exercise in planning. She was very close to being aborted because of this "embarrassment".

Anyway, she grew up thinking her grandparents were her biological parents until it was all laid bare one day.

In honour of their commitment to her, she wanted to keep her grandparents name, alongside mine, when we married - some 8 years after we had been seeing each other.

I had no problem with this - it is a honour.

Prior to my wife expressing this desire, I felt the same way as you OP, and the others here whom have commented thusly.

reply to post by Sublimecraft

That's a really neat story.
If something like that happened I'd have to agree to the hyphenated name. Otherwise, they're taking my name.

Its pretentious bs. In my job I have to fill in names on forms for people. I absolutely refuse to include a hyphen or any other punctuation. If they have two last names, I write the first of those as a middle name. When I call them from the waiting room, I'll only use the second of the last names listed.

Furthermore, if you have a first name that is completely made up, you are now mr/ms. I also will not call you "Heaven" or "Gorgeous", even if your mommy thought it would be really awesome to name you that. I guess I'm a bit of a name snob lol.

Both my children have hyphenated surnames, allowise there would be nothing to connect them as they have different fathers.

So it seemed important to double barrel them, to show there is a sibling link, if not they could easily be mistaken for not being related.

Having said that, it's only on official paperwork, day to day they are just known by their father's surnames.

Sometimes hyphernation counts.

reply to post by TruthSeekerMike


Agreed. The hyphenated last name is a bad compromise. If you want to keep your name then insist on a matriarchal family and start keeping the woman's name in your family. Hyphenating just seems like the woman wanted to look independent but failed miserably. I don't see their husbands sporting any hyphens in their last names.

When my wife and I got married, we actually made up a last name and changed both of ours. We have a new tribe now. Since we only had a daughter and cannot have more, we will start a matriarchal tradition (as it used to be with my ancestors) and we will encourage her future husband (or wife) to take on her family name instead of his.

This used to happen a lot among the aristocracy, because the wife's family might have an old and famous name which they did not want to die out.

A classic example is the Spencer-Churchill family.
Winston Churchill was actually a Spencer-Churchill- the original Churchill line had died out a couple of centuries before he was born.

Originally posted by TruthSeekerMike
For some reason yesterday I started thinking about these families I know that have hyphenated last names and I wondered how many generations it could go on before people realized it was getting to be a bit much. Here's what I mean:
Bill Smith marries Sally Jones and they become the Smith-Jones family, soon little Cindy Smith-Jones is born.
Larry Edwards and Emma McGee marry and have little Jonny Edwards-McGree.
Later, Jonny and Cindy marry and have little Jimmy Smith-Jones-Edwards-McGee
Somewhere across town, little Susie Johnson-Baker-Matthews-Simpson is born
Years later Jimmy and Susie have little Freddy Smith-Jones-Edwards-McGee-Johnson-Baker-Mathews-Simpson who later marries Jenny Price-Helms-Dart-Nelson-Williams-Goldstein-Wong-Grant to produce young Danny Smith-Jones-Edwards-McGee-Johnson-Baker-Mathews-Simpson-Price-Helms-Dart-Nelson-Williams-Goldstein-Wong-Grant
and so on.
I think people started picking a name less for sexism than avoiding obvious difficulties in introducing oneself. Funny to watch the name list grow though.

You're assuming all of the hyphenated names have anything whatsoever to do with "sexism".

My wife has a hyphenated last name for two reasons.

1. When we met we were both in real estate and she didn't want to render the $10,000 in signage she had completely obsolete overnight...nor make it impossible for all those people she handed business cards to for the last 8 years to find her in the real estate companies alphabetic directory. I imagine the same rule of thumb might hold true for any woman who has issuccessful and/or where name recognition or branding is important part of their career such as in the insurance, banking, investment, real estate, legal, consulting, research, scholarly, or creative fields to name a few. You know...almost everything except for being a nameless corporate drone, housewife, or nurse.

2. So the kids friends in elementary school (my step kids) could find our number in the school directory. If she changed her last name to "Johnson" kids looking for the phone number to call the "McCormick" house would have a hell of a time.

You really shouldn't assume that everything is some sort of grand political statement. Maybe they just make more money than you do.

Click here for more information.

I agree, it's a silly thing, but I know for me when I got married I felt like I was giving up part of who I was. It was just expected that I change my last name, which pissed me off. Why should 'I' have to change my name, why not my soon to be husband, kwim? I did it in the end to avoid controversy, I was much more mousy and a go with the flow, stay out of trouble type back then.

I have even considered changing my name back to my maiden name, now that I give less of a care who thinks what of me. LOL

Originally posted by pirhanna
I'm more concerned about people not at least proofreading their thread titles than I am
about people that use hyphenated last names.

just sayin.

Hay know...having tradishunal valus our watts importint, knot fansy book lurnin'.











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Originally posted by MaMaa
I agree, it's a silly thing, but I know for me when I got married I felt like I was giving up part of who I was. It was just expected that I change my last name, which pissed me off. Why should 'I' have to change my name, why not my soon to be husband, kwim? I did it in the end to avoid controversy, I was much more mousy and a go with the flow, stay out of trouble type back then.

I have even considered changing my name back to my maiden name, now that I give less of a care who thinks what of me. LOL

You should do it.

As a general rule of thumb, anything which really bothers the particular demographic of the guy in this video (below) is almost ALWAYS the correct course of action.

Originally posted by milominderbinder

Originally posted by MaMaa
I agree, it's a silly thing, but I know for me when I got married I felt like I was giving up part of who I was. It was just expected that I change my last name, which pissed me off. Why should 'I' have to change my name, why not my soon to be husband, kwim? I did it in the end to avoid controversy, I was much more mousy and a go with the flow, stay out of trouble type back then.

I have even considered changing my name back to my maiden name, now that I give less of a care who thinks what of me. LOL

You should do it.

As a general rule of thumb, anything which really bothers the particular demographic of the guy in this video (below) is almost ALWAYS the correct course of action.

says the video doesn't exist. LOL

Originally posted by MaMaa

Originally posted by milominderbinder

Originally posted by MaMaa
I agree, it's a silly thing, but I know for me when I got married I felt like I was giving up part of who I was. It was just expected that I change my last name, which pissed me off. Why should 'I' have to change my name, why not my soon to be husband, kwim? I did it in the end to avoid controversy, I was much more mousy and a go with the flow, stay out of trouble type back then.

I have even considered changing my name back to my maiden name, now that I give less of a care who thinks what of me. LOL

You should do it.

As a general rule of thumb, anything which really bothers the particular demographic of the guy in this video (below) is almost ALWAYS the correct course of action.

says the video doesn't exist. LOL

Ooops. My bad. I just fixed the link. Try it again or at this link below.

wow, what a loser! Not that I would hyphenate my name, but I would certainly change it back to my maiden name.